Nick groaned at the noise from downstairs, but stood up from the bed and left the room anyway. I watched him go, doubts already entering my head the moment he left my sight.
How can he not hate me? I�m so weak. I�m stupid. I�m� just tired.
I�m afraid to go downstairs. If that�s Mike� nothing good can come of that. If it�s someone else� well, nothing good will probably come of that either.
�Kara?�
Looking up from where I�d been staring sightlessly into my backpack, I found Nick standing in the doorway.
�We�re supposed to meet people for dinner tonight��
He trailed off, looking at the carpet as he fidgeted with his jeans.
Do we have to?
But I nodded.
�I� I�d normally say that we don�t have to, but Aaron for some reason decided he wanted to go.�
Wait a second� Aaron?
�Your brother?�
Nick nodded, a teasing smile curling his lips.
�Yeah, the one you like.�
I rolled my eyes and stood up, looking for where I�d left my shoes and socks.
�Do you mind if I go like this?�
�Nah, I�m not changing.�
Yeah, but you look hot in normal everyday clothes. I currently look like a boot camp reject.
Before I could find my shoes, warm hands landed on my shoulders and turned me around again. Nick looked me in the eyes for a split-second before wrapping his arms around my waist and pulling me against him.
I�m not even crying this time.
*
Kara hesitated a moment before pulling away slightly and sliding her hands across my shoulders and putting her arms around my neck, standing on her tiptoes as if it made much difference to her height. She rested her cheek on my chest and held me against her almost as tightly as I was holding her against me.
One of the good real hugs. This is what I wanted last night.
I breathed in the smell of her hair, realizing again how the scent of raspberries followed her wherever she went.
�Everything will be okay, Kara.�
I held her tighter for a second and then let go. My brother is still downstairs waiting for us.
She looked up at me as I helped her keep her balance while she returned to her feet. Innocent and sad, but no tears.
I�m getting somewhere at least. She�s hugging me back without having to be in hysterics.
Stepping away from her before I tangled my hands in her hair and kissed her until she couldn�t breathe, I ran my eyes around the room to find her sneakers piled against the wall.
�Your shoes are over there.�
She turned to where I pointed before turning back to me, curiosity written all over her face.
I was right. She couldn�t find her shoes.
�I�ll be downstairs with Aaron.�
*
I�d put on my shoes and had pulled my hair back up before reapplying my makeup and tiptoeing down the stairs. When I turned the corner, Nick was standing in the foyer talking to another blonde a few inches shorter who had his back to me.
Nick smiled when he saw me over Aaron�s shoulder, making butterflies flutter in my stomach.
�Aaron, I�d like you to meet Kara. Kara, this is my brother Aaron.�
As soon as Aaron turned around, his eyes did a quick full-body check of me, obviously trying to be inconspicuous. Giving me a slight smile, he took a few steps towards me as I took a few hesitantly towards him.
�It�s nice to meet you.�
He nodded and shook my hand, shooting a sidelong glance towards Nick.
�Did they say seven thirty?�
�Yeah.�
Aaron took his attention from me and put it back to Nick who led us out of the door before locking up his house.
�You driving or am I?�
�You. I�m not sure where we�re going.�
My god, they look like the same goddamn person standing next to each other.
�What?�
Nick caught me staring at him and Aaron, a little confused by my probably strange expression.
�You guys could be twins!�
I should think every time I choose to speak, not only when I�m over-analyzing everything.
Aaron chuckled and Nick smiled at me as I felt my cheeks burn in embarrassment.
�Yeah, we get that sometimes.�
Aaron jumped over the porch steps and Nick wrapped his arm around my waist, guiding me towards his car as he leaned down to my ear.
�You�re really cute, ya know?�
My cheeks grew redder.
*
I love you.
I want to scream that out loud even though Aaron would start cracking up. Kara would freak though, so I can�t.
Aaron better be nice tonight. It�s not like that full-body inspection wasn�t painfully obvious.
I opened the passenger side door and held her hand to help while laughing at how she had to climb in.
I love how short and small she is.
Turning her head towards me, she caught me staring at her, her hand still clasped tightly in mine. Aaron was holding back laughter at my pathetic display of obvious obsession.
Looking down at her hand in mine, I found myself confused again.
�How long have you had this?!�
Looking down at her hand, she saw the ring I was studying in the fading sunlight. When I looked up, her eyes caught mine and I saw a slight fear in hers.
�Did you have this in January?�
She nodded.
�And the first time. I got it the middle of junior year.�
I shifted my weight and thought over both days, trying to remember if I�d seen it.
�How did I not know?!�
I yelled the words more to express my own stupidity. She had a silver ring on her finger that blatantly said she graduated in 2003 and the name of her high school.
And I still thought she was my age.
�Dude, Nick, we�re going to be late.�
I looked up at her once again.
�I can�t believe I didn�t know!�
�So why ya gotta stand there
Looking like the answer now
It seems to me you�d come around
I need you now
Do you think you can cope
You figured me out, I�m lost and I�m hopeless
Bleeding and broken, though I�ve never spoken
I come undone, in this mad season�