Chapter Twenty
"Hey, girl, you look great!"
Shawonda sits down next to me at the breakfast table, eyeing me critically. I grin through a mouthful of toast and wink at her.
"You sure did have me running scared there for a bit. I’m damn glad Jennifer had the sense to call for help the way she did." My friend helps herself to a plate full of hotcakes and syrup, and nods when the server brings the coffee over.
"Heck, I was scared, too. At least what little of it I remember, I was scared. Jennifer is a treasure, truly. She picked me up and got me going again after Peter, and now this…" I sip the coffee, savoring the taste. Everything seems brighter, more sharp-tasting, more vivid than before. I guess that’s part of the rejuve process. I know I’m hornier than hell. "Here, try some of the grits--they’re great this morning."
"You certainly have an appetite!" Shawonda laughs.
I wink at her again, lecherously. "For more than food, my dear…"
"Oh, yeah?" She grins. "Get funky with yo’ bad self, girl, just go on…"
We both crack up, and I’m wiping tears from my eyes as Alexandra and Ariadne come walking out to join us for breakfast. Alexandra’s wearing a toga-like affair, very fetching on her slim, muscular frame, and Ariadne’s got her hair done up in a new style today. She goes through about three style changes a week now. Hope she doesn’t pick one that does something undoable… then she’d be in a pickle, I think, smiling at the two young Draka as they sit down across from Shawonda and myself.
"What’s so funny, Tantie-ma?" Ariadne says, picking up an orange and deftly peeling it.
"Yeah, tell…" Alexandra nods, taking the plate of country ham that Shawonda passes her way. It’s returned half-empty, I notice.
"Oh, we were just being old coots, Shawonda and me. That’s all."
"Nah, tell ‘em why we were laughing so hard, girlfriend." Shawonda nudges me under the table, clearly enjoying my deepening blush. Oh, I’ll get you for this, Sha, I think to myself, confining my reaction to a slashing stare for a moment.
"Oh, come on, tell, Tantie-ma…" Alexandra pleads, doing her "sad puppy dog eyes" routine with me. Seeing that look out of her mother’s face, which it is, since she’s a clone of Gwen, always makes me laugh, just for the sheer incongruity of it. Everyone else enjoys it, too.
"I was telling Shawonda here, of the roaming legs, yes, you , Miss Thang, mm-hhmm, that’s no one else’s leg there, now is it? I was telling her what an appetite I have now, after the rejuve."
Shawonda stops laughing long enough to say, "Tell them for what, bean-head!"
"Everything!" I yell, spreading my arms wide, up into the clear morning air. I also accidentally on purpose sprinkle Shawonda’s hair with toast crumbs. Ariadne notices, her eyes widening a bit, and then she grins conspiratorily at me. Alexandra’s too busy laughing, and Shawonda hasn’t noticed yet. I enjoy my tiny victory immensely.
"Everything?" The smooth, almost husky voice of my Muhmis comes from behind me, and then I feel her arms around my shoulders. She buries her face into the curve of my neck, nuzzling, nipping, and I giggle. "I thought we did almost everything last night… thought of something new, my pretty-girl?"
"Aw, Ma…" Ariadne rolls her eyes in embarassment, and Alexa nudges her with an elbow.
"Oh, come on, Ari, I know you say the same thing to May…"
"But at breakfast?"
Alexandra turns to face her sister. "Don’t, please don’t, act the prude with me… I know a thing or two, missy, about you…"
Scarlet, Ari ducks her head to everyone’s laughter. I murmur, "Enough, Alexa, don’t pick on your sister, please."
"True enough," Gwen agrees, sitting down next to me. She reaches for some breakfast platters, and then pauses, a curious expression on her deeply tanned, aquiline features. "Is that a new hairdo, Shawonda?"
"What?" Shawonda reaches up, and touches her tightly-rolled cornrows, fingering the tiny beads, and then discovering the crumbs. "Oh, you…" Her growl of frustration does hold an element of appreciation for a joke well-done, I think, as I wiggle away from her outstretched, tickle-threatening fingers. And of course I don’t mind at all that I’ve just somehow managed to wiggle right onto Gwen’s firm lap. I feel her purr of pleasure resonate from deep within her chest, and she sucks on an earlobe that’s conveniently placed within reach. I hand her a piece of melon, and the way she takes it from my fingers brings back quite direct memories of last night…
Shawonda finally breaks into a chuckle, and stands up, walking away from the table to brush the crumbs free. "I’ll get you, my pretty, and your little cat, too…"
"It was only payback for embarassing me in front of these two young, innocent, delicate flowers of youth," I crow, feeling Gwen’s hand run down my back slowly. Goosebumps appear on my skin, and it’s not very cold out.
"Mmh--hmm." Still smiling, Shawonda takes a glass of juice from the table. "I’ll still get you back. Don’t worry."
"Girls, girls…" Gwen says, grinning at the two of us. "It’s lovely to see all this energy. Perhaps we can put that to good use. Come on." She stands me on my feet, then taking me by one hand, and Shawonda by the other, leads us back into the mansion, and up the marble stairs, to her quarters. It’s a different kind of breakfast we get for the next couple of hours, certainly, but not one that I mind at all. The amused and tolerant laughter of Gwen’s daughters follows us up the stairs.
**
I roll over, onto my back, and feel the cool breeze that’s blowing the curtains into billowing folds of silk caress my bare body. Shawonda’s showering with Gwen; I can hear their laughter and an occasional squeal of pleasure. Grinning, I stretch, luxuriantly alone in Muhmis’ huge bed. I thought I had stamina, even more so after the rejuve, I say to myself, but man, Shawonda… once she gets going, it takes a Draka to wear her out. She’s something else, indeed.
Gwen pads quietly into the room, the sunlight glinting off drops of water that sheen her long-legged, muscular body. "Sleepy head," she croons, leaning over me and dripping on me unrepentantly.
"I’m not asleep, I’m merely inspecting the backs of my eyelids, madam." I tickle her, gently, and she purrs, as her hands begin to explore me. "Again, Muhmis?"
"Whyever not?"
"Well, there is work to be done around here, you know. And I need to check in on Alois, and see how he’s doing with his nanny, and I supposedly have a meeting with Alice around noon, to discuss some household things. Then you and I have to sit down and plan out some ideas on the negotiations, darling, sometime today… mmmphh… hmm… and well, mmmhh… yes, that’s lovely, Gwen… ah, gods, ahhh…"
A few moments later, Gwen’s sitting astride me, a wide grin lighting her tanned face. "And you were saying, my little planner?"
"Pony, you mean, don’t you?" I lick my lips and thrust upward with my hips, feeling the pleasant contrast between her hard Draka body and mine. Although, I think, I have a heck of a lot more muscle and less fat than I ever have before…
"Mmhh… yes, you are my pretty pony. You know my responses better than anyone, actually. One reason you’re my favorite, one of many. But you are lovely as a planner, an organizer, too, darlin’. Keep doing that, though," Gwen returns the motion with pleasure, "and I’ll have to reschedule a lot today. Not that I’d mind. All work and no play makes Gwen grumpy."
"God forbid!"
"Sarcasm? In the position you’re in?" Gwen laughs, leaning down and kissing me slowly, delicately.
"No, I was being quite sincere. I’ve seen you annoyed a couple of times, and I have no intention of seeing you grumpy. That sounds worse than annoyed."
"Well, yes, it probably is…" Muhmis agrees, and slides off me, with a final, long, motion of muscle against my body, splayed under her greater weight. I squeal, softly, and hear her chuckle in reply. "But you don’t have to worry about that, my Erin. Not really."
I sigh, partly with regret that Gwen’s not riding me anymore, partly with relief; sometimes I feel trapped under her, and she knows it. Uses it. Her arm, with steel-like strength, begins kneading my thighs, and I groan softly as her fingers relax me. "Ah, god, that feels so good, Gwen…"
"You feel good, Erin. Very good. Over the years, we’ve grown to know each other’s needs, likes and dislikes. You’re wonderfully responsive, and even more so since the rejuve. Feeling more energetic?"
I roll onto my side, facing her. "Well, yes. In some ways. Food tastes stronger, I can stay awake longer, my libido’s up higher than I can ever remember… but I feel sort of sad, inside, too. It’s hard to place a finger on it. I don’t know, maybe it’s just me."
Long fingers cup my chin, raising my head so my eyes look into her leaf-green ones. Gwen smiles, gently, slowly, and whispers: "Tell me anything you want, my sweet, and it’s yours."
I smile back, sadly. "What I want to ask for, you can’t give me."
Muhmis sighs, and caresses my cheek. "Besides freedom, darlin’… you and I have been through that before, and I don’t really want to go through it all again. But anything else… an island, perhaps? A vacation? A pet?"
"Ah, Gwen…" I look into the eyes, and see honest love there, and some confusion. Most serfs would have a list a mile long, and be ready at any point to ask for something; I’ve never been one of them. The most I’ve ever bent the rules for with Gwen is to beg someone off from a punishment, or to curb one that I think is too harsh for the circumstances. I have enough trouble asking about those instances, I think, so how does she expect me to answer?
"My sweetlin’, my pretty-girl… you’re so valuable to me, you know that? I want to make you happy, guide you somehow. Help you accustom yourself to the new place you’re in, after the rejuve. You’re the first non-Draka to ever receive an unlimited lifespan. Ever. That has to take some getting used to, darlin’…"
"I know. It’s hard, sometimes. I catch myself looking in the mirror, wondering who’s looking back. I don’t know how all of you just accept it, like… like it’s just a thing. It’s more than that. It’s hard, Gwen…"
"Then let me help you. Name it, and it’s yours… within limits."
"Oh, yes, the limits. No, please…" I pull her back to facing me, as she’s begun to roll away, onto her back. Her eyes are clouded, now, and I wonder if I’ve made her mad. "Please, Gwen, Muhmis… don’t be mad. You’ve always told me to be honest with you. Can’t we talk about this some? Or should I be quiet now?"
A snort of amusement. "Yes, precedent, of course. That’s true; I’ve always told you to be honest. Why does the limit on the concept of freedom bother you so much, Erin? Like Alice has said, someone’s always in charge. Do you want to be a Draka, now?"
"No."
Gwen’s eyebrows rise. "Hmm… I remember asking you that before, and getting the same answer. I can’t imagine why, though, for the life of me."
"Gwen, it’s… I was raised to believe that personal, individual freedom was something worth defending, dying over if necessary. That’s what I thought America stood for. After the Nimitz, things seemed different. But that didn’t diminish the value I placed on freedom. When you gave me the choice of serving you or dying, I chose life. But that’s not a choice that made me happy, inside, although I guess if I’d chosen death, I wouldn’t be feeling anything, now would I?"
"No."
I sigh, and trace a line along her collarbones with a fingertip. "Being with you has made me very, very happy in many ways. I have children, a lover, good friends, good health, and now the rejuve thing. More power than most humans. But that doesn’t mean I enjoy power for power’s sake alone. I don’t. If I could, I’d retire and go back up to the mountains, and spend my days studying nature. Or something. Fossil-hunting. Berry-collecting. I’m good at organizing people, Gwen, good maybe at leading them. But sometimes, I don’t enjoy that."
"Why? I don’t understand. Doing that, leading, being in command, makes me feel, well… wonderful."
"Part of you is wired that way; part of it’s that your culture, your society, reinforces those behaviors in you. I’m different."
"Yes, darlin’… but charmingly so…"
I lift her head back up, and place a finger against her lips. "Changing the subject like that isn’t fair, unless we’re through talking. Are we?"
Gwen laughs, and kisses my finger. "No, little missy, I guess not. Although I’m not used to being ordered about like that…"
"Sorry," I grin. "I don’t want to be a Draka. I want, one day, to be a free human who may choose to stay with the Draka or not, and not based on a life or death situation. Does that sound amazing to you or something?"
Leaf-green eyes stare into hazel ones. I hear the laughter of children outside, drakensis and human mixed together. "That’s what I mean, that’s what I dream of, Gwen," I say, gesturing toward the window and the sounds outside. "Can’t you even imagine that?"
"Well, I am a tiny bit short on imagination, Erin…"
"Seriously!"
Gwen sits up, and coaxes me up, too, putting her arms around me and holding me close in the coll breeze. The scent of magnolias and new-cut grass drifts in, and I snuggle against the always-surprising heat of my Muhmis’ body. "Darlin’… seriously? No. I can’t really imagine that. Draka are designed to take charge, to be dominant. Even among those children, the drakensis babes will be the leaders. Always."
"You can’t see any way to change that? Ever?"
"Why should we? It works, we like it, our society has outlasted wars, persecutions, and all sorts of other problems, well into the twenty-fifth century. Not bad for a bunch of folks who were kicked out of their native climes for their beliefs, over and over again."
"But in order to survive, you need to be able to adapt. Somehow. Don’t be fossils, Gwen, if you can help it. Maybe that’s what I’m so sad about; I feel like now that I’m unaging, I might be a fossil."
"Prettiest fossil I’ve ever kissed…"
I snarl with frustration, and Gwen looks startled. "Erin…"
"I’m sorry… it’s important to me, that’s all. And when you get kissin’ and what-not on me, then it seems like you’ve just been, well, tolerating my pillow talk. Is that it?"
"No, certainly not. I just scented that you were getting upset, and thought I’d switch your label on the emotion. That’s all. I value what we talk about, Erin. It gives me a great deal of insight into the human part of your thinking. That, in turn, helps me."
" ‘Life is change…how it differs from the rocks…’ I don’t know if you can understand that. Gwen, you and the other Draka are so magnificent, so wonderous in so many ways, and it’s like this dominance thing is such a silly fl--" I catch myself, blushing. There’s limits, and then there’s limits, girl, I sternly tell myself.
"Go on, finish your sentence, Erin-mine." A gentle giant-strength hug underscores the words, but I’m not sure. I don’t want to make her mad, of all things, and ruin this… exchange we manage to maintain.
"Nah… I was just talking…"
"No, tell me what you were going to say."
"It’s like, okay… don’t be mad. I was going to say: it’s a silly flaw. Something that if you wanted to, you could change somehow. Maybe it’s changing, without you, and your generation, really realizing it. Please don’t be mad, Muhmis…"
"Mad? I hope not. Angry--not that either. Somewhat confused, and amused. Why do you think it’s changing? We’re quite a static society, darlin’…"
"Have you thought about the way the Earth/2 generations of Draka interact with humans?"
"A bit… there’s not the necessity for the extreme measures my mother’s generation had to use, to force the yoke on humans, and there’s more of a relaxed relationship between the youngsters and their saafn. But don’t let that fool you into thinking the younger generation are going to surrender dominance. They’re Draka, dear. Always will be."
"But they can change… we can change things, Gwen…"
"I know you want to, and maybe in some ways, we can. We will. But don’t break your heart, Erin, wanting something I can’t give. No Draka can give that to a human, a kawtuh, or a servus. You’re our saafn, ours to possess, ours to guide and protect. Always."
"Oh."
Gwen wipes a tear from my cheek. "Sweet, please don’t be sad about this. Try to accept. It makes it easier. Believe me. After all these years…"
"I know. I’m just stubborn. Stubborn and hopeful. Still."
Muhmis rocks me for a few moments, whispering sweet nothings into my ear, purring softly. "Is there anything I can give you that you’d like?"
"More times like this, Gwen."
"That’s fine with me. Perhaps, in a few decades, we’ll be closer to understanding each other. We have millenia, now, together, with luck. Give it time, my sweet Erin."
"I know." I snuggle against her, my arms wrapped around her neck. "Do we have time before all our meetings for one more, well… you know…"
"Such a charming full-body blush you have, my dear. Ah, yes… we have time for this, and this…"
Time spins away, the outer world forgotten for a spell, the universe consisting of just the two of us, exploring, reaching places we’ve never touched before. The breeze blows coolness across our passion, and the morning flows by, unnoticed.
**