November 27, 2003...BattleMania Part II (BANG! TV Taping)
The first match that I was involved in that night was Yako Romero vs. "Little Wahoo" Zack McDaniel. The match was great. Of course Yako beat the hell out of Zack throughout the whole match, but Zack did hold his own. In fact he was doing so well at one point that I had to interfere and trip him up. My interferance helped for a while, but in the end Little Wahoo prevailed and got the pin. I hate it when that happens! Afterwords, Zack pulled me in the ring by my beautiful brown hair and proceeded to give me one of his famous chops. Don't get me wrong. I'm not one of those women who cry every time she gets knocked around, but DAMN! That was one of the most painful chops I've ever felt. I'll get him back though. Afterall, he's just a little kid. *LOL*
The second of our matches was Yako and Simba vs. Tommy Gunn and Shane Chung. After being chopped earlier in the night, I wasn't feeling too great during this match. I didn't display my services as much as I usually do. Unfortunately, my team paid for it. Before I realized it, Tommy Gunn and Shane Chung has won the match. I was so extremely pissed! Immediately following the pinfall, Tommy Gunn came over to me at ringside. He said that he wanted to make peace between us, and he wanted me to be with him instead of Yako. As I followed him into the ring, I thought about his offer. After seeing Yako beaten twice that night and twice at BattleManie Part I, I was furious. For a brief moment I was actually thinking about joining Gunn. However, as I said I, I only thought about it for a moment. Gunn opened his arms for a hug (Who can blame him? I mean look at me. *S*) and I quickly drew back to slap him. To my surprise he caught my arm and turned me around, only for me to be on the receiving end of Shane Chung's powerful stunner. I couldn't believe it! For the second time that night I had been manhandled. Needless to say I will have my revenge, and as we all know payback is a b*tch!
Well it was finally time for one of the most anticipated matches of the night...THE EVENING GOWN MATCH! I was finally going to show everyone just how truly dangerous I was as I wrestled "The First Lady of Wrestling" Missy Hyatt. The special guest announcer for our match was none other that Bobby "The Brain" Heenan. As I came into the ring I shook Bobby's hand and kissed him on the cheek. I couldn't believe my eyes when he actually wiped off my kiss. Come on! Who in their right mind would wipe off my kiss? Anyway, I grabbed the mic and quickly let everyone know that I would NOT be wearing an evening gown for the match. I announced that I was not about to degrage myself to the level of Missy Hyatt. Unlike her, I am not accustomed to having my clothes ripped off in front of a large crowd. *LOL* Missy finally came to the ring being accompanied by that overgrown ape "The Reason" Marcus Dillon. As they stepped into the ring, Marcus started to crack jokes on my chest size. He brought two balloons to the ring, and they were blown up to be the size of Missy's chest. First, he held them up to her. Then he came over to me, held them up to my chest, and deflate them. I was already pissed off and he had to push me just a little further. I grabbed his wrist and was just about to knock him out when the ref stepped between us. I don't have to defend myself and the way I look to anyone, and I'm not. All I have to say on that subject is that my chest is a D and they are completely real. Which incidently is more than I can say for Missy Hyatt. *LOL* Anyway, back to the match. As soon as Missy turned her back to me, I attacked her with a double axe handle. After following up with two snapmeares, I turned to celebrate with the crowd. That was my first mistake. She grabbed me and turned me around to give me my second stunner of the night. As soon as I could get up I tackled her to the mat and we began to "catfight". I hate that word but that's really what it was. Somehow she managed to roll over on top of me, and then the b*tch ripped my shirt off! I was humiliated. There I was...a multi champ of many different federations, and I was laying on the mat topless. After that, I was determined to make her pay. I got up and punched her dead in the face. I kicked her in the stomach and hit "The Screaming Teardrop". I have to admit, giving a DDT never felt so good! I ripped her dress completely off and won the match. She was in such bad shape after my finisher that Marcus had to carry her backstage. Poor little Missy. Oh well! She'll think twice about stepping up to me next time. That's all for now, but I'll keep you updated as always. To read more about the show and The Funking Conservatory, visit their website at www.dory-funk.com.
November 15, 2003 - Me, Yako Romero (Sin), Forsaken, and Blake Richards all worked a show for Dory Funk Jr. in Ocala, FL. The show was taped for their TV show, "BANG!" I managed for Yako in both of the matches that he had that night. The first match was Yako vs. Magnum "The Giant". I really showed off my managing skills in that match. After he defeated Yako, I repeatedly got in the face of the 7ft 280 lb. giant and actually put my hands on him while doing so. Trust me when I tell you I paid for it dearly. Magnum snapped and I ended up on the receiving end of his powerful chokeslam. Later that night, it was Yako and Simba vs. Little Wahoo Zack McDaniel and Bret Van Michaels. Again, I showed my perfect managing skills and again I paid for it. After the match was over, I immediately rushed over to take care of my man. Zack McDaniel then caught me offguard and hit me with a baseball slide. I don't know how they can do such horrible things to a woman like me. I'm beautiful, intelliegent, a great manager, and just all around perfect. Well, it's all paying off for me anyway. I was informed after the show by Marti Funk (Dory's wife) that the tape of Dory's show is being sent to WWE this week. Hopefully after the WWE sees how great I am, my career will really start to take off. Dory Funk Jr. and Marti Funk came up to all of us after the show and actually thanked us for our performances. I felt very honored to hear that. Both of Yako's matches were great even though he lost. By the way, that won't happen again. As for Forsaken and Blake's matches, they were great also. That's about all for now, but I'll keep you updated. To read more about the show and The Funking Conservatory visit their website at http://www.dory-funk.com.
