| What I Have Learned as I Mature...Ha Ha YEAH RIGHT! |
| I've learned that you cannot make someone love you. All you can do is stalk them and hope they panic and give in. I've learned that no matter how much I care, some people are just assholes. I've learned that it takes years to build up trust, and it only takes suspicion, not proof, to destroy it. I've learned that you can get by on charm for about fifteen minutes. After that you better have a big dick or huge boobs. I've learned that you shouldn't compare yourself to others - they are more screwed up than you think. I've learned you can keep puking long after you think you're finished. I've learned we are responsible for what we do, unless we are celebrities. I've learned that no matter how hot and steamy a relationship is at first, the passion fades, and there had better be a lot of money to take its place. I've learned that people you care most about in life are taken from you too soon and all the less important ones just never go away. I've learned that caffienated drinks and energy pills are great ways to kick in a new day but it is often bad to mix the two. You end up acting like a chihuahua on speed. I've learned that being flipped off your body board by a rough wave can be the best ride of your life. I've learned that even though the tag might say it's flame retardent, more than likey it will succumb to the power of a cigarrette lighter. I've learned that even if you rip that tag off the mattress, no alarm sounds and no authorites show up on your doorstep to take you away. I've learned that alcoholice beverages and pain killers are not good sleep inducers. I've learned that if you cannot identify what is on your plate or pronounce its name, it would wiser if you didn't eat it. I've learned that playing strip poker with known cheaters will end up with you completely undressed and them still sitting in their sweatshirts. I've learned that scissors are not meant to be carried in your mouth. I've learned that money isn't everything but it sure as hell can pay for it all. I've learned that technology has a mind of it's own and it's bigger than it's owners. No amount of promises or threats to the machine will make it work any faster, more effecient, quieter, etc. I've learned that if you sit on a street corner with a sign that reads "Will Not Work For Food" you will get a lot more attention than if you were willing to work. You will not get any food, however. **Note** I do not endorse the above activites, I am not encouraging anyone to try anything, and these activites were not all experienced first hand. |