When do you say "No" to your child?
a. Only when he has been really bad, like beating someone
or doesn't want to go to sleep though it is very late.
b. As soon as your child makes a mistake.
c. When he wants to play and make noise and you want to sleep for a while.
d. When he doesn't want to help.
e. We should never say "No" to our children.
f. As soon as he has worse results than his brother in school.
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You should say "No" to your child in cases a, c and d.
Explanation:
Having a few clear rules that your child can understand is the correct thing. We should expect our children to help with small tasks and to be quiet for a while during the day.
Don't expect perfection - just a reasonable level of decency: - )
Always picking on a child (b) may have the opposite effect than you want - he becomes even wilder, maybe being bad is his only way of getting your attention? Or he may simply choose to stop listening to you. Other children may become afraid, shy and sad.
(e) You - and other people - will live with your child for many years. A few rules of decency are necessary to make daily life work.
(f) Children are different, progress at different speed, have different interests and abilities. Make sure your child has a quiet place and time for his homework. Expect homework to be done first - then play! Offer your help and give it when asked for it! Help your child study before an exam - don't just pick on him afterwards! Reward hard work - not only top results on exams! Don't compare brothers or sisters with each other - it makes them dislike each other and creates more troubles.
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Helene Ibrahim
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