Buffy: "I'm sorry. But never."
**Xander: "Well, this is new territory for me. I mean, my valentines are usually met with heartfelt restraining orders."
**Buffy: "Sorry to say, Xand, slaying is a tad more perilous than dating."
Xander: "Well, you're obviously not dating Cordelia."
**Buffy: "Oh, Valentine's Day is just a cheap gimmick to sell cards and chocolate."
**Angelus: "Dear Buffy. I'm still trying to decide the best way to send my regards."
Spike: "Why don't you rip her lungs out? It might make an impression."
Angelus: "Lacks... poetry."
Spike: "It doesn't have to. What rhymes with lungs?"
-Giles: "Look, here's another. Here. Um, Valentine's Day. Yes, uh... Angel nails a puppy to the..."
Buffy: "Skip it."
Giles: "Uh, but it..."
Buffy: "I don't wanna know. I don't have a puppy. Skip it."
-Xander: "Oh, no, no, no. It's okay. You know what? It was wrong to meddle with the forces of darkness. I see that now."
-Willow: "Sorry. I wanted to surprise you."
Xander: "Good job! High marks."
Willow: "Don't be so jumpy. I've been in your bed before."
Xander: "Yeah, but Will, we were both in footy pajamas."
-Xander: "Th-that's it! This has gotta stop. It's time for me to act like a man. And hide."
-Giles: "I cannot believe that you are fool enough to do something like this!"
Xander: "Oh, no, I'm twice the fool it takes to do something like this."
-Xander: "Buff, for the love of God, don't open the raincoat."
-Oz (after hitting Xander): "That kind a hurt."
Xander: "Kinda?! What was that for?"
Oz: "I was on the phone all night, listening to Willow cry about you. Now, I don't know exactly what happened, but I was left with a very strong urge to... hit you."
-Cordelia: "Damn it, Xander, what's going on? Who died and made you Elvis?"
-Drusilla: "Your face is a poem. I can read it."
Xander: "Really? It doesn't say 'spare me' by any chance?"
-Buffy (smiles): "Hi, Oz!"
Oz: "Hi."
Buffy: "I seem to be having a slight case of nudity here."
Oz: "But you're not a rat. So call it an upside."
Buffy: "You think maybe you could get me some clothing?"
Oz: "Yes, I can. Just, uh... don't go anywhere." (leaves)
Buffy (looks around): "Really not an issue."
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