TITLE:  A little less numb -- 4/?  (S/D, W/T, X/A, S/B)
AUTHOR:  Bree
EMAIL:  [email protected]
RATING:  PG-13
SPOILERS:  BtVS Season 5 post "The Gift", mention of a character from
the movie
CLASSIFICATION:  Spike/Dawn = friendship
SUMMARY:  The continuation of Dawn's diary entries following Buffy's
death.
DISCLAIMER:  As much as I'd love to claim ownership for all things
BtVS, we all know that I don't own them and many more powerful,
snake-handling professionals do.
DISTRIBUTION:  Athenaeum, Original Sins, Lil' Nibblin, RRS&S, Dawn &
Spike, Fire & Ice and any other lists I'm on that are archiving this
story.  Anyone else, please ask first.
FEEDBACK: If you want to live through the night.  The choice is yours.
NOTE:  Sorry it's been a while since I posted one of these.  If you've
forgotten what's going on, you can refresh your memory(s) at
http://athenaeum.homestead.com/ALittleLessNumb1.html   I actually
forgot that I had written this part weeks ago since I've been so caught
up writing my other stories.  Sorry for the delay, but I hope you'll
enjoy it!
DEDICATION:  To whomever decided to give Spike the mussed up 'bed hair'
in season 5 & now season 6.  You are a god/goddess and must be
worshipped forever, your most holy divine-ness.  I am truly a crusty
minion and not worthy.  *thud*


~+~+~+~+~+~+~+~+~+~+~+~+~+~+~+~+~+~+~


Entry - August 5, 2001




I.  Hate.  Him.

I.  REALLY.  Hate.  Him.

I hate him.  I hate him.  I hate him.  I hate him.
I hate him.  I hate him.  I hate him.  I hate him.
I hate him.  I hate him.  I hate him.  I hate him.

Spike - What kind of a stupid name is Spike anyway?  Lame if you ask
me.  Totally lame.   Might as well be called Rock, or Storm, or Pike.
Well, not Pike.  At least *he* was cute.  And cool.  And Pike didn't
call me stupid names like Platelet, and . . . and Nibblet.  Let's not
forget Little Bit.  And who does *he* think *he* is anyway?  Telling me
I can't go out on a date until I'm 16.  SIX-frigging-TEEN!  Who does he
think he is telling me, The Key, the
thousands-of-years-old-so-old-no-one-REALLY-knows-how-old-I-am Key when
I can go out on a date!  I ought to lock him up in a glass room at
sunrise and throw away the key.  That will teach him!

So *when* does he decide to do this?  On my birthday, of course.  God,
why did he have to pick today of ALL days to become Big Brother?  I'm
SO angry I could just do something really, *really* mean right now if I
had super-powers.  And who knows?  Maybe I do.  I was made up from
Buffy, maybe I've got some of her Slayer super-strength just waiting to
come out and dust some vampires.  Especially one peroxide-headed,
British vamp with a stupid Billy Idol obsession.

I was so excited this afternoon because I got a call from Matt Johnson.
*The* Matt Johnson of the sophomore class, the JV football AND
baseball captain!   Oh my god, I was *so* excited.  We met last year
during the science fair, he was with his friends acting all cool and
stuff, but as they walked away from the table Lisa and I were at he
looked back and smiled at me.  So today Matt calls me and asks me out
next Friday night.  Out, as in a d-a-t-e!

But noooooo.  'Big bad' has to turn all evil on me and shut that down.
And to make things worse, Willow agreed with him!  How could she?  She
knows what it's like to want to go out on a date with a guy.  Well, at
least she did before she decided she was gay, or bi, or whatever.
Still, the point is she shouldn't have agreed with him.  It's not like
they're my parents anyway.  And just because Buffy put Spike in charge
of me doesn't mean he can control when I date.  I really doubt that
Buffy meant for him to make up dating rules.  All of my friends have
been able to date for at least a year now.  Mom was at least a little
giving and you'd think that since it's around my birthday Spike would
be nice about it.

Aaaaah!  I just want to scream, but no, I have to go and pretend I'm
all happy because the Scoobies planned a stupid party for me.  I'm only
going through with this because they're Buffy's friends and if she was
here we'd still be doing something.  But as soon as they all leave, I'm
putting a new bag in the sweeper because Spike is dust.



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*to be continued*
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