Heather Rose

Jewel Kilcher.

Tribute by Joey Kennedy

Our Heather, our friend, our 'sis' - now, our Angel. Where can we ever begin - so many stories, so many memories, so much love ...

I'd like to start with some words from Heather - from an article she wrote titled "Looking Back With Gratefulness": (Heather said) "I want to tell other disabled kids that even though they are disabled, they can get the most out of life ... I got the most out of life ! My future's looking good now ... it might be hard at first but it will be worth it. You have to keep in mind that life has good things to offer - you just have to look for them" (CCA, 1987)

I chose these words from the many inspirational words that Heather wrote - because she wrote them in 1987 - a decade before receiving her justly deserved recognition, respect, and accolades. Before her many achievements became known world wide. Before she ever wrote or starred in her own film, "Dance Me To My Song". Before she ever dreamed she would travel up the red carpet in Cannes in her beautiful gold dress. And a decade before Fiona and I met her and she changed us and our lives forever.

Heather believed from her own life experience that there were some fairly obvious assumptions, misconceptions and outright prejudices when most people met her for the first time. She called it the "Fools and Angels Syndrome" - the stereotype of the 'disabled girl' - either she was a 'complete idiot' - hence the Fool or perfectly innocent - hence the Angel. Our Heather struggled with all her fiesty spirit to let us know she was none of those things - no fool, no angel, no 'poor wee disabled girl' - she was and always will be 'Heather' - the person. As she said in an interview: "Anyone with a disability is still just a person, no more, no less".

Yet we know her to be a person who was truly special - her stark courage and bravery; her wicked and warped sense of humour; her honest and genuine compassion for all of us; her stubborness, strength, drive and determination; her irrepressible spirit; her unbeatable attitude and passion for life; and her gigantic lovable heart - these are just some of the many characteristics that truly made Heather the beautiful person she was.

Not to mention her lusty, naughty, lewd and outrageously wicked flirtatious nature ! And of course her inexhaustable taste for Brandy, Chocolate, Gossip, Bitching, Bands (The Boys !), Brandy, Music, Parties, the 'F' word, Brandy, and the innumerable number of men she flirted with - wooed and pursued - and habitually swore her undying love for ! This is the 'sis' we knew, the 'sis' we grew to love.

On first meeting Fiona in 1997 as a prospective carer, Heather typed : "Fuck, not another blonde bimbo !". This soon proved so not to be the case, and our gutsy friend Fiona became her carer for 5 years, bravely travelled the world with Heather, became her closest friend - and now her nearest and dearest 'sis'.

On my first encounter with Heather, cast opposite her in her film "Dance Me To My Song", she eyeballed me long and hard, then typed a rather derogatary comment out comparing our breasts - "my tits are bigger than your tits.", she typed smugly. I snapped back "It's not a competition !", and held her stare as she looked with those all-seeing eyes into my very soul. She then laughed her cheeky devilish laugh and grinned, then typed up "We Click" - and we sure did.

And so, from 1997, Heather slowly drew Fiona and myself into her world and eventually our roles our roles as carer and co-actress became irrelevant and we became Heather's 'adopted sisters' - which is why we stand here today for Heather - and for all her carers, friends and 'sisters'.

I still remember looking at her tiny body and wondering how she would ever find the strength to get through the film "Dance Me To My Song", but it was she who coached me through my most difficult scenes, holding 2 trembling fingers up to eye level and maintaining eye-contact - 2 fingers to symbolize 2 words - "Go Girl" - our secret salute !

Heather was the original "You can do anything girl" - the original "Go Girl" girl !! So cool, so fearless, so brave in so many ways. As one journalist once said "as cool as Spike Lee, Nick Cave, and Madonna rolled into one. Cool is about being differnt and unafraid." (Ruth Hessey, Sydney Morning Herald).

We will never forget Heather - I will never forget her funny little voice on my phone so many times - "Hiy, Hiy, Hiy", followed by "Sis, pleez call", followed by "Pick up Bitch !".

You have taught us sistergirl - to fight for what you believe in; to question, confront and challenge; to face both our fears and desires; to wage war against life's walls and barriers - to never give up no matter the odds. Your faith in us all; your belief in yourself and your dreams; your desire to leave the eyes of the world open - to turn prejudice and ignorance around; to dare to travel such a difficult road; to make ours and other lives a little easier. All of this has helped so many of us to believe in ourselves and our own dreams; to never forget how blessed we are and how blessed we have been to have you in our lives; to truly understand the universal need to love and be loved.

Heather's golden dress is now on permanent display in the National Museum in Canberra - in an exhibition titled "Eternity" - her stupendous success described by the simple word 'Joy'. And in some ways, today can also been seen as a joyful day, as it is with such joy that Heather has touched our lives. Heather has stirred our souls, awoken our minds, opened our eyes, and brought strength and renewed spirit into our lives, brought love into our hearts - and left us with the hope of a brighter and better tomorrow.

Heather died on the morning after her 36th birthday in the arms of one she loved. But we will always hold her in our arms and in our hearts. She will always be with us. Her burning desire was always to make her mark on the world. 'Sis' - we cant thank you enough for what you have done, and what you have given us. We know you Heather. We applaud your extraordinary life. You fiercely believed in a better life, a better world, and the power of love - and we know you believed in Angels.

And now, we here who gather to say our goodbyes, will always miss you - and love you - maybe we may come to believe in Angels too. Go Girl, Go Dancing. As Frida Kahlo once wrote :

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