| What memories she had were few, grainy, and somewhat misleading. She remembered trips � many short trips with her mother. Bags packed, her small pink suitcase in the backseat with her. She recalled her mother�s anxious face, her eyes darting between her rear view mirror and the road. But the trips never lasted long. She supposed it was something special she had done with her mother � she recalled staying at motels, rather, she recalled sleeping in a bed with her mother. The closeness of her clammy skin. She did not remember her father. Or rather, she had no idea about remembering him or not. Pacey had never shown her a picture, and had never spoken of him. Mera did remember someone � a very tall man with dark hair. She had one particular fuzzy memory of herself at the park with the man. She had ridden the merry-go-round or a train, or something. She just clearly recalled losing sight of the man and panicking. She remembered no more. She had seen a few photos of her mother, but not through Pacey. One night, after babysitting for Mitchell and Catie, Dawson had brought out a photo box. Pictures from when he was 16, he told her. She laughed at the silly photographs that had captured Pacey � most often goofy looks on his face. She had seen photos of her Uncle Jack, her mother�s brother. He only visited once every while, but she knew him well enough to know he had changed since his teen years. There was one photograph that Dawson had captured � no doubt a candid. In it, Pacey�s face shone brightly � his arms wrapped around a blonde girl. She was facing him, her eyes clear. They were so into each other that they had obviously not taken notice of Dawson with his camera. �That�s Andie. She was so happy.� Dawson had said. Andie. Andrea McPhee. Her mother. Mera stared at the photo for a long time. �She�s so beautiful,� she had finally said. �So happy. Pacey never shows me photographs.� Dawson had given her a panicked look then, afraid he�d done something wrong. She�d assured him it was no problem � she did not need to tell Pacey. He had given her the photo to keep, and she placed it in cellophane and in the dresser drawer beside her bed. �God, look at those two,� Dawson had said, gazing at the photo. �They were so in love. Pacey � he�d do anything for her � no matter the cost or the reprimand by his father.� Remembering his comment, Mera thought of Vartan. She thought of him � and how kind he�d bee to her, how he�d just integrated with her and Jeff. �Perhaps he�s my Pacey?� she thought. Maybe she was supposed to take her mother�s lead, follow her heart, be rash. She felt bad � seeing as though Pacey had told her no on two separate occasions now. And yet somehow, she didn�t mind. She did not see it as disobeying him � but rather offering him a chance to see � to give her the choice. She picked up the phone and dialed. �Hello?� �Vartan?� �Hey, Mera,� he said. �What�s shakin� bacon?� She laughed. �Not much on this end. Listen, I just wanted to tell you � if you still wanted to, I can see a movie with you tomorrow morning.� He was silent, but when the voice came, it was clearly ecstatic. �Are you sure? I mean, I�m totally up for it � I seriously want to do this with you.� �Oh yeah, it�s cool.� �With Pacey, too?� He asked, warily. �Because Mera, he�s an awesome guy. I wouldn�t want to get on his bad side�� �He�s fine.� Mera said, shortly. �I mean, we talked about it, and he�s cool.� �Ok. So � uh � I�ll pick you up around 11-ish?� �No,� she said. �I mean � no, let�s just meet downtown somewhere. The old fountain? I kind of told Jeff she could come too. That�s the reason Pacey is cool with it. So � she�d rather meet there.� �Oh, alright,� he agreed. �Then, with Jeff there � it�s not really a date?� �Oh no,� Mera said, her voice strong and sure. �It�s a date.� * * * �Jennifer Lindley.� Pacey cleared his throat. �Hey, Jen? It�s Pacey.� �Pacey! To what do I owe the honour of this phone call, all the way over to my side of the world?� �Oh, you know,� he laughed nervously. �Just checkin� in, wanting to know what�s up, what�s new. How�s the practice going?� �Good�� she was weary. �Listen, Pacey. My assistant told me the call was long distance, so I assume you�re calling from Capeside, and aren�t actually in New York.� �Right you are. You see Jack much anymore?� |
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