| Eventually, the orphanage let him take Mera home temporarily. It took another year for the adoption to become final. When he�d first seen her � without Andie nearby � she had studied him intently. At two years, her blue eyes almost seemed wise beyond their years - though full of wonder and curiosity. He continued to visit her � not once did she speak a word. He read her stories, talked, and told her all about Capeside. The day he �temporarily� took her home to Capeside was the first time she breathed a word. �Mommy isn�t coming back. Is she?� Heartbreaking words from a child almost 3. She had never questioned his identity � how he knew her mother, where he came from. All she cared about was her mother. And he�d lied. Not knowing what to say, he had simply replied, �no, Mera. She�s not.� As the years progressed, she had wanted to know more. Why her mother had not come back. At three and a half, she�d said to him, �Mom�s dead, isn�t she? That�s why she isn�t coming to get me?� At five years, a simple �yes� answer had not satisfied her. He�d been forced on a whim to explain. And he had used all he could think of. He concocted a story about Andie being ill. He�d given her a death bed confession. He explained his past relationship with her, which Mera had long before picked up on. �You loved my mom, right Pacey?� she often said to him. Yet somehow, through the years, she had never asked about her dad. Never a question or a wonder. When required, she referred to him as her father. In her early years, she had shown mild interest, and had �out of the blue � asked him, �where did my dad go?� Also not knowing how to properly explain �after he killed your mom, he disappeared,� Pacey had hedged the question with, �I never knew.� Mera had enquired further, but eventually caught on that when she brought her father up, it angered Pacey. She�d learned not to bring it up, to just accept her dad was gone and her mom had died of a prolonged illness. Though he regretted lying to her in the first place, Pacey never saw � and still never did � another way. His job was to protect Mera. And he was. Protecting her from the truth. * * * The minute Mera walked in the door that Friday afternoon, Pacey sensed something. It was as though smelling something out of the ordinary � some element just not fitting in. But he ignored it. �Hey Pacey,� Mera greeted him warmly. Sign number one � which he was ignoring, of course. When they had their �words� the night before, Mera had been angry with him. She had spent time away � gone into her own sanctuary. Then Joey had called for her to babysit. She had come home that evening in a better mood � having spent time with Catie and Mitchell � but had exchanged minimal words with him. All day at work, Pacey had mulled over their fight � what each had and hadn�t said. He wondered if perhaps he was being too pushy with Mera � if perhaps he was overbearing. When Dawson had called, a short time ago, he�d posed the question of Mera dating. Dawson had hedged the issue � implying it was really his decision. But he had reminded Pacey that at 16, he and Andie were already having sex � after dating no more than a year. When Pacey had spun the question around, asking about Catie � Dawson had merely shot back, �Catie�s ten years old. I should hope she�s not thinking of dating.� And yet somehow � a seemingly sullen Mera had turned herself around and was now happy again. Pacey also chose to ignore the second implication � Mera�s beginnings of mood swings. �Hey, Mera. Dawson just phoned � said to tell you hello.� Mera smiled. �Cool. Has he got a part for me in the new Hollywood blockbuster yet?� Pacey�s brow shot up, and he grinned. �Not yet, though I�m sure the moment the call comes through for a defiantly dangerous 16 year old�� �Whatever.� Mera laughed. �Did he mention when he�d be heading home?� �Nah, but I�d assume when the problem shooting�s finished. Why?� �Ah � no reason. I mean, I can tell Catie and Mitchell miss him. That�s all.� Pacey caught the defensive note to her voice, and raised a brow again. �How was your day, Mera?� �Oh � great! I mean, not too bad. Pop quiz in history � more experiments in Bio�� her voice had regained its peppy nature. �Much homework for the weekend?� She shook her head. �Not too bad. Besides,� she downcast her eyes suddenly, �I figured maybe I�d head out on the town tomorrow afternoon. How about you Pacey?� |
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