Blonde Jokes
RIVER WALK
There's this blonde out for a walk. She comes to
a river and sees another blonde on the opposite
bank. "Yoo-hoo" she shouts, "how can I get to the
other side?" The second blonde looks up the
river then down the river then
shouts back, "You are on the other side."
BLONDE ON THE SUN
A Russian, an American, and a Blonde were
talking one day. The Russian
said, "We were the first in space!" The
American said, "We were the
first on the moon!" The Blonde said, "So what, we're
going to be the first on the sun!" The Russian
and the American looked at each other and shook
their heads. "You can't land on the sun, you
idiot! You'll burn up!" said the Russian.
To which the Blonde replied,
"We're not stupid, you know.
We're going at night!"
SPEEDING TICKETS
A police officer stops a blonde for speeding and asks her very nicely if he could see her license. She replied in a huff, "I wish you guys would get your act together. Just yesterday you take away my license and then today you expect me to show it to you!"
HORSEBACK RIDING...YEEHAW!!
A blonde decides to try horseback riding, even though she has had no lessons or prior experience. She mounts the horse, unassisted, and the horse immediately springs into motion. It gallops along at a steady and rhythmic pace, but the blonde begins to slip from the saddle. In terror, she grabs for the horse's mane, but cannot seem to get a firm grip. She tries to throw her arms around the horse's neck, but she slides down the side of the horse anyway. The horse gallops along, seemingly impervious to its slipping rider. Finally, giving up her frail grip, the blonde attempts to leap away from the horse and throw herself to safety. Unfortunately, her foot has become entangled in the stirrup, she is now at the mercy of the horse's pounding hooves as her head is struck against the ground over and over. As her head is battered against the ground, she is mere moments away from unconsciousness when to her great fortune..... Bill, the Wal-Mart greeter, sees her and unplugs the horse.