Curiosity


My life....My Poetry

Well this is the home page obviously and I am supposed to tell all of you who I am well right now there isnt much to say but I guess since there is something I might as well say it

I have had a rough life and right now I am not at a state where I am going to divuldge any information about that if some of you know something about me consider yourself lucky for I rarly tell anyone anything

These are my poems

Untitled

To look at yourself
In the lake of your own blood
Smiling knowing it will all be over soon

To think to yourself
In the darkest corning of you mind
Crying knowing you'll be alone

To give you love away
Watching as they squeeze your heart
Die as your soul withers Away

To be nothing
Following as your told
Living this world as an empty shell

To be left alone
To be ignored
Is death the same?
.......It is

Because love loved another

I sit there and watch
no smile
no hope

To sit and think
what love I have missed
with no one to hold

To watch your love
love some one else
to kiss them and hold them

while you stand there bear to the world
your hands cold without a warm touch
your arms aching to hold

You would rather die then to see there love
but the best you can do is turn away
to close your eyes and wish it to disappear

You smile and laugh around them
You think happy thoughts
when really you wanna fade away

You try to reach out
only to be stopped by some one else
a barrier that doesnt allow you near them

but still the loved one talks to you and tells you how much they love them
but you sit there and smile and laughed and agree
when ever word they say stabs your heart wounding your soul

but still you grin
still you fight
to live on and conquer such things

You just cant take it any more
you life doesnt make sense
its all a blurr

They where your life
but someone else had to go and grab them away
you are left to stand alone

from then on you are left in the cold
from then on you die alone
from then on your loveless

Just because you love loved another

Fate or my death?

Why is it I stand in a crowd
but I feel so alone
Why is it so warm
yet its so cold
Why doesnt it hurt
when they laugh and turn away
Is it because Im numb
or is it because I dont care anymore
This life of mine
does it deserve to move on?
does it deserve to see another day?
only fate will decide
and hopefully fate will be in my favor
to end it all
to lay in my own cooling blood
to smile at the night sky
lifeless eyes staring off
fate can be cruel
but death...
death is gentle

My cold hands burn to die

Im all alone
In this world of cold
Looking beyond my life
And into the death that would be mine

I am in pain
A pain no one can see
It is just covered up
By the mask that smiles

I can no longer see
I can no longer feel
My body is numb
My mind dead

I am alone in this world of death
My love has left me to die
My heart is now an empty void
No longer to be filled

My life is is ruin
To be just blown away by the wind
I am just ashes
I am just dirt

To be stepped on
To be used
This is my world
This is my life

My mask has failed me
Showing the world my pain
This is my true face
The face of death and pain

I am dead now
To no longer love
Because the love I had
Turned and walked away

This is my world

In this world we are alone
Every step is a step of stone
Our minds gone blurred
From thoughts of home

But from that point
You see no way
But walk straight down
And look just the other way

To die alone
To be afraid
This world or cold
Every ones heart tightly bound

But we are in a world of people
Every step is a step on a cloud
Our mind can be cleared
And thoughts can be gained

From that point on
You see life the way it should be shown
You continue forward
On the path of hope

Because one day
Your hand wont be so cold
Because some one will care
and that care would make you world change

My love will be the death of me

I stare at your face
your eyes
and your lips
just to think you love me
as much as i love you
but theres something you dont know
about my love to you
ill die the day you leave me
ill die the day you will die
i will die trying to protect you
my love is yours along with my heart
i love the way your hair falls around your face
the way the sun hits your eyes
i love the way your skin glowes
during the sunset
you were my angel
my gaurdian but i will still die to protect you
to take you from harm
to keep that smile on your face
to keep you precious blood run through your vains
remember
remember what i have said
to leave me is to kill me
to kill me is to hate me
but i will always love you
till death do us part

Worthless

What is hear is not what i see
but what i feel is no what i hear
am i confused or am i lost
Why cant i stop
did i even start
my life is lost
my eyes are blind
my ears are deaf
my touch is numb
I walk alone
no one to guide me
no one can help me
the world doesnt see me any more and i it
i see no ones faces but there backs as they are turned to me
there is no need for me to live any more for i have abandoned life
for it has abandoned me
my life is worth nothing
and the world worth all

Sleeping

as i rest my head
down to bed
dreaming and sleeping but still i dont know what to do
i wake up just screaming
what have i done to you
get out of my head
i dont want you there
i dont know you your not my friend
as i lay in the corner my bloody wrists staining the wall
i think to myself
think nothing
think nothing at all
good bye this world
youll never see me not at all
anymore

My blood and tears

Tears are falling
There are so many
why are they falling?
Who is crying?

This blood that fall
it is so warm
Why is there blood?
Who is bleeding?

My hand goes to my face
My cheeks are wet
My hands are wet
Tears fall from my hand

I am crying
The tears are mine
I cry because it hurts
I cry because I am no more

This blood is mine
I sit in this blood
I bleed because it hurts
I bleed because my heart

Cant you fix this?
cant my family Fix this?
They cant because there the one to do this
They caused this pain

I promised never to cry agian
They wanted me too.
They did it and left me to die
Well i am dead

I am dead inside
I am a shell of nothing
I would seek death but i am dead
So i sit and wait

Darkness Falls and so do I

Darkness falls slowly over my mind
My sight fails to see any longer
My breath only to be caught short
To die slowly why out love in your heart

To fall down never to get up
To lay there with out the will to move
your only family is yourself
your only love is your self

The darkness smothers me
It begins to get cold
I just stand there and stare
I dont even run

Why would I
Is there a reason
If I was left to die by my loved ones
Then why not let it be

I have died in my heart and my mind
My body is the only thing that stops me from going to hell
but i am not scared I hug this death of mine
But i am scared to die with out love

I lay down now to rest forever
a tear falls from my face
my body cold
but your warm hand in mine reminds me
That you stlll care about me

Endlessly Falling

I float in this life of my
With no control of what way I go
It never ends
My fall to death

I am always traveling to sadness and greif
But I am used to it
I am immuned to the cold
all I can do is smile

I am falling with out grace
I am falling with out heart
These things i do not need
For where i am going there pointless

My body now aches only to bleed
I wait for my next chance to feel the pain
If death wont kill me I will bring myself closer to him
I just wait with my wrist to him

I continue to fall
I no longer resist
because i know tomorrow it we be the same
I know tomorrow there will be no change

I can only wish to die
To smile my last
To breath my last
Beacuse overall I am endlessly falling

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