Mind Games
                                 by Cathryn
TITLE:  "Mind Games"
AUTHOR:  Cathryn (SpikeDchs@aol.com)
DISTRIBUTION:  Michelle's Xander and Deadboy page.  Otherwise, please ask.
I won't say no, I just like to know where my stuff is.
FEEDBACK:  Please!!  This is my first slash fic - actually, my first smut
fic period - and I need to know if it was okay.  But, no flames; I have a
fragile ego and I worked really hard on this story.  Constructive criticism
is good, though.
COUPLE:  Okay, for the Whiteknight people, this is pretty much a
no-brainer, but for the BBETA people, it's Angelus/Xander
SUMMARY:  A sequel to "White Knight Tarnished."  It's smut fic - I'm sure
you can guess.
NOTES:  In case you hadn't figured it out by now, this story does contain
material that may be offensive to some people.  Oh, and, of course, no one
under the legal age should read this, not that I care, but you gotta cover
the basics.
DISCLAIMER:  The characters and settings belong to Joss.  I don't know if
he's gonna want them back when I'm done with them, but oh well.  =)
DEDICATED:  To my anonymous beta reader, who assured me that this story
does not suck, which gave me the courage to post it.

"Mind Games"

"So."

"So," Giles replied.  It was the fifth time in fifteen minutes Xander had
said that; the third time around Giles had gotten the distinct impression
that Xander was trying to work up the courage to say something.  Would he
get it this time?

No.  Xander shrugged and returned to the book Giles had handed him after
the teen had offered a sarcastic promise to not "color on the pages."

It was a couple of days after Buffy had been released from the hospital.
Giles had come in after hours to research an interesting question that had
come up during a conversation with the advanced English teacher.  Shortly
after dusk, Xander had bolted in, looking like he was being chased.  He'd
hastily assured the alarmed Watcher that he'd just given himself a scare,
but was clearly in no hurry to leave, as he'd then proceeded to beg the
book off Giles and spend the next three minutes quietly reading, at the end
of which he'd said brightly, "So!"

"So," Xander said again, trying to imagine the conversation that might
follow if he said what he'd been trying to say for the past quarter hour:
"So, Angel kissed me.  And I kissed him back."  He had no earthly idea of
how Giles would react.  Would he take it calmly, as Xander hoped, and let
him talk and get it out?  Or would he totally wig, as Xander feared, and
really let him have it, saying everything that would confirm his worst
fears about that kiss?

"So," Giles replied wearily, growing rapidly tired of this little game.  He
shot Xander an irritated look when, once again, the boy gave a faint sigh
and returned to the book that Giles suspected he wasn't reading.

After a couple of minutes, Xander took a breath and started to say the same
syllable yet again.  Exasperated, Giles interrupted him with,


Xander, if there is something you wish to say, then do say it because I am
ready to listen.  Otherwise, please be quiet and let me research in peace!"
He didn't think he'd sounded overly harsh, but Xander flinched, gulped,
muttered an apology, and looked down at his book.  Giles sighed.

"I'm sorry, Xander.  I didn't mean to, um . . . blow up at you."  He waited
for Xander to smirk a little at his obviously comfortable use of the
American colloquialism, but Xander merely replied seriously,

"It's okay, Giles.  My bad," and began to read the book in earnest.  Giles
watched him briefly.  It was becoming more and more obvious to him that
Xander was absolutely itching to talk about something, but something else
was holding him back.

"Xander," he said presently, "if you do have something to say, I am ready
to talk, or simply to listen.  *Whatever* it may be," he added.

Xander studied the Watcher intently, and Giles gave him his best
"I-want-to-help" look.

< Sure, he says that now, but I bet he's expecting to hear some
Hellmouth-enhanced teen thing, not that I kissed Angel. >

Xander shook his head slowly.  "No," he said finally, "it's - it's
nothing.  I'm just gonna go now."  Later, Xander would often find himself
wondering how things would have been different if he had told Giles.

Xander stood and headed for the door.

"Xander."

"Your cross."  Xander had left it on the table.  Giles tossed it to him.

"Thanks,"  Xander said absently and left, unaware of Giles's look of
concern.

Xander got about half a block before the same fear that had sent him
running for the library threatened to take over again.

What if Angelus was out?  What if he was looking for Xander?  Xander
couldn't stop thinking about what the vampire had said.

< "I don't know what just happened, but I wanna find out." >

Xander found himself moving a little faster, clutching the cross tightly in
both hands, heading for home instead of the Bronze like he'd planned.  <
Sorry, Cordy. >  Desperately, he tried to rationalize away his fear.  <
I've gotta relax.  I mean, he probably said that to freak me out.  And it's
working.  He's probably off doing his unting thing in the park.  Where I am
not.  Besides, I never run into him anyway.  Why would tonight be any
different?  And why do I get the feeling that I just jinxed the hell out of

myself? >

This question was answered about two minutes later when Xander was grabbed,
pulled into an alley, and shoved, though not overly roughly, against the
wall.  Frantically, he tried to raise his cross, but Angelus knocked it
almost casually from his hand.

"We need to talk," he told Xander.

"No, we don't," Xander replied tightly.  "There's nothing to talk about."

Angelus chuckled mirthlessly.  "'Nothing to talk about?'"  he echoed.  "You
mean, I'm the only one who can't stop thinking about that kiss no matter
how hard I try?  Boy, don't I feel like an idiot now," he said
sarcastically.

"I don't have time for your little mind games, Angel, okay?" Xander
answered sharply.  Angelus's eyes darkened.

"Then *make* time."

"Fine," Xander snapped, suddenly more irritated than anything else he
wanted to think too much about.  "Let's see.  If I reschedule that, and
push that back to tomorrow . . ."  Angelus gave him a quick, rough shake.

"I'm not interested in games right now, either," he informed Xander.
Xander sobered quickly.

"Okay," he answered cautiously, "what are you interested in?  You wanna
talk?  Talk.  You wanna kill me?  Not a lot I can do to stop you."

"And if I wanna fuck you?"  asked Angelus.

Xander could only stare in shock and arousal.  Angelus slipped off his
leather jacket, letting it drop to the ground.  Underneath, he wore a black
silk shirt.

Angelus untucked Xander shirt and slid his arms slowly around his waist
beheath the shirt.  Xander gasped at the sensuality of the cold silk
brushing along his warm skin.  Instinctively, he reached up, putting his
arms around Angelus's shoulders.  Angelus held still, determined to
maneuver the boy into making the next move.

*****
Xander tembled slightly, his every nerve in overdrive; feeling the silk
draw the warmth from his skin, feeling Angelus's fingers move in lazy
circles against his back, until his entire body was screaming for him to
*do* something.

Tentatively, he leaned forward and kissed Angelus.  The vampire's arms
tightened around him and he returned the kiss fiercely.  Encouraged, Xander
slipped his hands down over Angelus's chest, enjoying the feel of the silk,
without breaking the kiss.  His fingers brushed over Angelus's nipples; a
soft moan sounded in Angelus's throat.  Xander did it again.  Angelus
kissed him
harder and held him even tighter, crushing the boy's hips against his.

It wasn't enough.  Angelus didn't know why such minor foreplay had him so
hot so fast.  Of course, he didn't really care at the moment, either.  He
broke the kiss and began to move his mouth along Xander's jawline.  It was
Xander's turn to moan slightly, as his hands moved up of their accord to
grip the back of Angelus's head, fingers sliding through his hair.

Angelus reached the joint of Xander's jaw.  He flicked his tongue briefly
over Xander's earlobe, eliciting a shiver of pleasure from the boy, before
he slid down to Xander's throat.

Xander cringed, trying futilely to stop Angelus's progress, cursing himself
for being an idiot.  Angelus easily deflected his efforts, of course, and
Xander clenched his teeth, closed his eyes, and waited for the bite.

Angelus paid little attention to Xander's fear, focussed completely on his
throat.  He could hear the boy's pulse, hear the blood flowing through his
veins.  And yet, oddly, he had absolutely no interest in feeding.  At
least, not on Xander's blood.  Instead, he hungrily kissed and licked the
soft, delicate skin, savoring the warmth against his lips and the taste on
his tongue.

No bite came, and Xander relaxed, tipping his head back to give Angelus
better access and firmly ignoring the voice in the back of his head that
was screaming, < Are you crazy?! >  Xander moaned softly, causing a
pleasant vibration against Angelus's seeking mouth.  He began to run his
fingers through the vampire's hair.  Angelus licked at the hollow at the
base of
Xander's throat and tried to move downwards, only to be impeded by Xander's
shirt.  He growled in irritation and searched hopefully for a row of
buttons.  No such luck.

"Ahem," Xander said, his voice both tinted with amusement and hoarsened
with lust. "Let me try."  He quickly pulled the shirt off over his head,
tossing it next to Angelus's jacket.

"That works too," Angelus muttered.  Xander's uneasy laughter died in his
throat and Angelus lowered his head and ran his tongue delicately over
Xander's right nipple.  It hardened under his ministrations, and he nipped
lightly at it, sending a small jolt of pleasure through Xander.  Xander
moaned and tangled his fingers in Angelus's hair, trying to hold him
there.  Angelus
acquiesced briefly before moving on to Xander's left nipple, leaving a
chain of kisses stretched across his chest.  He recalled that it had been
the pounding of the boy's heart that had first caught his attention and
desire.  He paused to listen now - the heart wasn't pounding so much as it
was racing.

Abrputly, he straightened up and kissed Xander's lips, placing a hand on
Xander's shoulder and sliding it down over the boy's chest and stomach.  He
cupped Xander's half-erect cock through his jeans.

Xander pulled away from Angelus's kiss even as he arched up to meet his
touch.  He met the vampire's gaze, wide-eyed, and the intensity of the lust
he saw there aroused him further.

Angelus felt Xander harden in his hand.  He began to massage him slowly,
catching the boy's mouth in a possessive kiss.  Soon, Xander was fully
erect.  Angelus ended the kiss and opened Xander's jeans, carefully gauging
Xander's reaction.  He saw a certain amount of alarm - no surprise there;
probably the only hand that had ever been on Xander's cock before was his
own - but it was overshadowed by urgent lust.

Angelus tugged Xander's jeans and boxers down.  Xander gasped nervously,
trying to grab the wall behind him.  Angelus grasped the base of Xander's
cock and slowly slid his hand down to the head, which he fingered for a
moment before repeating the motion.  Xander gasped raggedly again, doubly
shocked by both the unfamiliar sensation of a touch other than his own, and
by the intense pleasure that shot through his body.  He closed his eyes,
trying to orient himself, and was taken by complete surprise when he felt
Angelus's lips slide around the head of his cock, tongue probing lightly at
the tip.

Angelus gripped Xander's hips and pulled the boy slowly into his mouth,
tracing the tip of his tongue over the hard shaft.  Xander shuddered as the
waves of pleasure hitting him grew more intense.  His hands clamped down
onto Angelus's shoulders as he attempted, unsuccessfully, to gain a modicum
of control over the situation.  Angelus scarcely noticed the gesture,
focussed on pulling Xander down into his throat.  He began to contract the
muscles rhythmically around the head.

The pleasure building up inside Xander exploded, and he came with a hoarse
cry.  Angelus pulled back slightly and swallowed the come quickly, feeling
the hot liquid go down his throat.

Xander braced himself shakily against Angelus's shoulders, his breath
coming in quick, shallows gasps.  Angelus stood, holding on to Xander's
arms so that the kid wouldn't fall over.  He'd been suppressing his own
growing need, and he couldn't ignore it anymore.  He kissed Xander hard and
pressed his erection against the boy, silently demanding that he do
something.  Xander responded to the kiss and then pulled away.

"What - what do you want?" he asked, praying that he wouldn't be expected
to use his mouth.

What Angelus wanted was to turn Xander around, push him onto his knees, and
fuck him until they were both exhausted.  Normally, he wouldn't hold back,
but he had spent the last several nights searching for Xander to start
training him to be a good lover.  He'd learned long ago that if you pushed
someone too hard, they wouldn't learn a damned thing, and one look at
Xander's slightly panicked expression told him that the kid was far from
ready.  Angelus gave a mental sigh of resignation.

"I don't care," he told Xander, his arousal and frustration manifesting
themselves in a low growl underscoring his words.  Xander sighed softly in
relief.

Tentatively, he stroked Angelus, marvelling at how taut the leather pants
were stretched over the vampire's hard cock.  Angelus bucked against his
hand.  Xander jumped, startled by the intensity of the response.

"Relax," Angelus almost hissed, reminding himself that Xander had no idea
of how teasing his light touch was.  Xander just gave him a look that said,
< You've got to be kidding. >  Angelus glared at him, tempted to remind him
of how easy it would be for him to simply shove Xander onto his knees and
fuck his mouth.

Hesitantly, Xander unzipped Angelus's pants and tried not to look too
surprised by the size of his cock.  He touched Angelus through the black
silk boxers he wore for protection against the chafing leather, purposely
distracting himself with the smooth texture of the silk.  Angelus groaned,
pressing against Xander's hands.  Xander stroked him harder, one hand
wandering upwards to run over Angelus's silk shirt.  Impatiently, Angelus
pushed Xander's hand back down, pointedly hooking his fingertips in the
boxers' elastic.  Xander glanced up at him uncertainly.  Angelus's
expression told Xander that he would brook no resistance.  Slowly, almost
warily, Xander pulled the silk garment down.  Angelus moaned slightly as
the night air came
in contact with his bare skin.

Xander stared at Angelus's large cock, his unease suddenly replaced with
curiosity.  He ran his hand over the cold, hard shaft, eliciting a moan
from Angelus at the warmth of Xander's palm.  He did it again,
experimentally cupping Angelus's testicles in the other hand.  Getting into
it, Xander gradually increased the speed of the hand stroking Angelus's
cock until he was pumping it hard.  Angelus, gasping for air he didn't
need, leaned forward and braced himself against the wall behind Xander.
Seconds later, he came, spraying both of them liberally with semen.

Xander, suddenly exhausted, leaned back against the wall and closed his
eyes, fumbling to dress himself.  Angelus, far from done for the night,
nonetheless dressed also, glaring silently and making a mental note to be
sure to build the boy's endurance. He picked up his jacket and tossed
Xander's shirt to him.  Xander put it on without opening his eyes.  Angelus
elected not to tell him it was on backwards, saying instead,

"Don't fall asleep here.  It's not safe."  He meant not safe from your
basic human felon, since the scent of a head vampire's come on the boy
would send any other vampire all but running in the oppostie direction.
But then, Xander didn't know that.  His eyes opened and he muttered,

"Right.  Where's my cross?"  Angelus chuckled softly.

"You won't need it."  Without bothering to explain, Angelus walked out of
the alley, in search of a fledgling vampire to vent his increasing tensions
and frustrations on.

< Great.  The return of Cryptic Guy. >  Xander, suddenly in urgent need of
a hot shower, decided to forget the cross, and headed for home.

The End

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