| All stories are written by MadShrubbery, and are the sole property of her and this site. If she finds out you've stolen it, she's gonna so kick your ass. Plus, Grandma will be so disappointed in you. |
| Episode 6: The Funny Farm |
| Page 6 |
| �2001 by Rebecca J. Burke & Hashbrown Casserole for the Matchbox Twenty Soul, Inc. |
| Meanwhile, back near the Ranch� Paul kicked a stone that was in his way, and kept on walking. �Dammit, how much further?� he asked out loud. �It feels like I�ve been walking for miles!� He suddenly heard a twig snap, and turned in the direction of the sound. No one was there. Paul went back to walking, and cursed under his breath, wishing he hadn�t worn sandals. He then noticed that a single car hadn�t passed him on the highway since the Navigator. �That�s odd�I thought this was a busy highway,� he said aloud, since he loved the sound of his own Paulio-manly voice. Another twig snapped, and Paul whipped around to see what did it. No one was there. Now semi-freaking out, Paul broke into a power walk, flexing his little butt as he went. �I might as well tighten my ass as I go!� he thought. And then�he heard it. A whinny. Paul turned. Paul screamed. Paul fell to his knees and wept. Paul saw his beloved sock hat poking out of the mouth of�Mary Lou. �YOU DAMN DIRTY APE!� he screamed (Manly this time.), pointing at the Shetland pony as it stood behind the black fence that stretched along the highway. �DAMN YOU! DAMN YOU TO HELL!� Mary Lou just stood there staring at the upset creature. �Okay, so we meet again, huh? You want a piece of me, huh? BRING IT ON, BEEATCH!� Paul yelled, getting to his feet and strutting up to the fence. �COME ON!� Mary Lou whinnied, and shook her head. Paul ran away screaming across the highway to the other right-of-way, and fell flat in the drainage ditch. �Okay, so I can�t beat her up,� he thought to himself. �Dammit, I need to get my hat back! But HOW?� He slowly crept up the embankment and peeked over the pavement at the pony standing on the other side. �She�s so�deceptive! How can I outsmart her? Dammit, I know I can, I�m educated, and she�s just a wanton beast of the devil! I need to get her to drop my hat so I can grab it. But HOW?� Paul gingerly watched Mary Lou stand by the fence, whipping her tail around, and occasionally shaking her head, trying to keep himself out of sight (Which was easy, he�s quite a little guy, you know.), �I think ponies are like dinosaurs�if they don�t see me, I don�t exist.� He then noticed a piece of broken glass lying directly in front of him, and he cautiously picked it up. �I know, I can use this to blind her, and she�ll drop it then�maybe she�ll even run away,� he thought. Slowly he crawled across the pavement commando-style, and back over to the other ditch in front of the fence, glad that no cars had come while he was on the highway. Paul didn�t realize how stupid a move that was until he was right in the middle, and suddenly thought of his favorite video game, Frogger. Nonetheless, our little hero made it, and waited until Mary Lou moved directly in front of him. Positioning the glass just so, the sun caught it, and the glare blinded the pony for seconds, scaring her, and causing her to drop the sock hat. |