* "Listening to the news! Again?"
"Well, it changes every day, you see."
-Uncle, Vernon, Harry Potter
* "Oh, Ron, how wonderful! A prefect! That's everyone in the family!"
"What are Fred and I, next door neighbors?"
-Mrs. Weasley, George Weasley
* "You don't mind if we don't kiss you, do you, Ron?"
"We could curtsy, if you like."
-Fred and George Weasley
* "Ron, we're supposed to show the first years where to go!"
"Oh yeah," said Ron. "Hey- hey you lot! Midgets!"
"Ron!"
"Well, they are, they're titchy..."
-Hermione Granger, Ron Weasley
* "Yeah, Quirrell was a great teacher," said Harry loudly, "there was just that minor drawback of him having Lord Voldemort sticking out the back of his head."
-Harry Potter
* "Well, yeah," said Fred, "your temperature'll go right up-"
"-but you get these massive pus-filled boils too, and we haven't worked out how to get rid of them yet."
"I can't see any boils," said Ron, staring at the twins.
"No, well, you wouldn't, they're not in a place we generally display to the public-"
"-but they make sitting on a broom a right pain in the-"
-Fred, George, and Ron Weasley
* "The teachers were, of course, forbidden from mentioning the interview by Educational decree number 26, but they found ways to express their feelings about it all the same. Professor Sprout awarded Gryffindor 20 points when Harry passed her a watering can, and Professor Trelawney announced to the startled class that Harry was not going to suffer an early death after all, but would live to a ripe old age, become Minister of Magic, and have 12 children."
* "So... you think it amusing to turn a school corridor into a swamp, do you?"
"Pretty amusing, yeah."
-Professor Umbridge and Fred Weasley
* "Come to number 93, Diagon Alley- Weasleys' Wizarding Wheezes. Our new premises!"
"Special discounts to Hogwarts students who swear they're going to use our products to get rid of this old bat."
-Fred and George Weasley