"I can forgive, but I cannot forget, is only another way of saying, I will not forgive. Forgiveness ought to be like a cancelled note - torn in two, and burned up, so that it never can be shown against one." - Henry Ward Beecher
He opened his eyes slowly; the pain from the brightness of the light was too intense as he opened his eyes. He kept his eyes closed as he realized he was okay. Draco�s eyes flew open in fear and he shot up looking around franticly for his two boys. He saw both of them sitting by his bed, Bari had a black eye while Becan had multiple scratches and cuts. Bari was smiling softly at his brother who was asleep in the arms of his black-haired brother. Draco looked at the boy and smiled, Severus was sleeping in the corner. �Hey� Draco rasped out.
Bari carefully placed Becan into the chair and ran over wrapping his arms around his father, �I love you.� Draco let out a little laugh and managed to say love you. �They... They want to take me into surgery... they want to try again. They want to try to get me... they all want me...� Draco stroked the boys hair. �And... I think I want to.� Bari looked up to see Draco�s startled face, but it wasn�t startled, it was a soft expression. �I... I want to be able to hear music... I love it to death, but I can�t hear it.�
�Bari... what... whatever you want I�ll support you all the way.� Severus had woken up and was smiling at him, �You bastard, I thought it was you at the door.� Draco looked pointedly at Snape. �Now get me out of this hell hole. I hate the smell of hospitals.� Bari�s laughter filled the small room. Becan was slowly brought out of his stupor and grinned at his father, he waved at him wordlessly.
The family got out of the hospital rather quickly with Severus�s careful wording. Draco had his arms around his two boys as he walked to the silver bmw golf that was parked outside. They climbed into Severus�s small car and flinched as his cuts moved around. He knew with Severus�s help his cuts would be mere scars by the time he had to go to diagon alley.
�So what happened after I err... passed out?� Draco asked uneasily. Bari was tapping his fingers on the dashboard oblivious leaving the shyer twin to deal with this.
�Well... you see we had to fend them off...� Becan signed, Draco nodded. �Well he got hold of Bari�s pants and forced them down. I fought the second one and helped Bari who was standing in nothing but boxers.� Becan took a breath in and looked at his twin who seemed to be in his own world.
�Then they, there was only two, tried to get me on the ground... Bari pounced on them and bit one. Then one had both of us pinned the guy who was bigger had me pinned and began stripping me and he actually managed to get all my clothes off... tore them off... and Bari was much in the same state, boxers were still intact.� Becan shivered, �And then... and then Bari managed to get his unconscious. And the man had me turned around when Bari tackled him.�
Draco sat quite stunned. �I see.� Draco didn�t know what the two were after, he was beginning to think it was something more then just that. Something more. Who are these people? Death eaters? Draco shivered at the thought.
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�Draco! Draco!� Bari called out, shaking his father awake. Draco swatted at his son only to hear giggles, �Dad! Come on Severus is waiting in the car for you.� The father of the two boys groaned and pinched the bridge of his nose. He had been fully healed and Severus had never told him why he had come yet. Draco knew he would tell when he was ready. Draco stood up and got out of bed, not thinking about his current state of undress. He then heard catcalls from Bari, Becan was laughing silently from the door frame. Draco stuck out his tongue and stepped into his pants. Both of his boys raised an eyebrow as he zipped up his pants without anything under them, but said nothing.
They were soon in Diagon Alley, Draco looked around and smiled. The two boys smiled at their father as he went into the robe shop. They had told he was going to be resorted, Severus stood behind them waiting to pay.
�Ah, Mister Malfoy! Which of your little boys- oh.� The man laughed, �Not so little any more I see! Well, which one needs a new robe? Or maybe both need-�
�I need school robes... I�m going back to school.� The man clasped his hands together and stated his congratulations. �I don�t know what house I will be in...�
�No worries young man! Don�t worry at all, most first years don�t and we get their robes in enough.� Draco nodded, �Now.. get down to your knickers and-� at the sight of Draco mortified face the man laughed, �Well, you see mister Malfoy times have changed and to get a proper size you have to strip down.� Draco looked up to see his smirking boys.
�Well... you see... I don�t exactly have anything on under my pants... so if you will just measure me like they use to.� Draco smirked as the man rose an eyebrow, �What can I say, I�m not exactly use to wearing any form of knickers after... well after seventeen years of what I do for a living.� The man bent down and started measuring Draco, �You probably just wanted to see me in my underwear! Am I right?� The man looked up, �Ah! I knew I was right.�
�I�m married to a girl, sir.�
The blond-haired-father smiled, �Most of my customers are married to a girl, sir.� Draco mocked. The man shook his head defeated. Draco heard someone cough and he looked over and saw Severus with an eyebrow raised, and Becan laughing silently. Bari was looking at formal dress robes oblivious to the conversation the men were having. Draco shrugged and looked down at the floor.
They were soon looking for books, Draco had a love for books when he got pregnant he started reading more books then he thought he would ever read. Many craved food, he craved certain kinds of books. Then there was that brief time where he craved sex.
�Sev...� Draco whined during one of their tutoring sessions, �Sev... if you ever want to have a go... my legs are open for you.� Severus looked at the boy with a raised eyebrow. Severus had started laughing, �What! I�m being serious Sev... If you ever want to get some... I really want you.� Draco looked offended as Severus continued laughing. �You know what! My offer still stands, but I�m leaving. You will be able to find me in your bedroom with nothing on.� Draco had stormed out of the private potions lab Severus had and went to his Head-of-House�s bedroom.
Draco shook his head at the memories, trying to clear them away. He let Severus pay for his books and then Severus said he had to go do something so that left Draco and his boys to their own devices. Draco wandered for the hour period, letting Bari and Becan mingle with their classmates.
(&)
Severus met them an hour later he had tears in his eyes, but none of the boys questioned him. �I have to go see Remus...� The onyx-eyed man said as he looked down at the floor. He handed Draco the floo powder and said his good byes. �I�ll see you for dinner in three days.� He kissed Draco�s forehead.
Severus aparated home, the smell of cigarettes met his nose. He knew who it was immediately, �Achan... what are you doing here?� The boy was wearing black pajamas pants without a shirt.
Achan Ezra Snape was Severus�s big mistake. He had adopted a child too early in his life; he had been disorganized and alone. Severus was not able to be supportive and the boy had already been a preteen when he was adopted. Achan resented his father; he held great remorse for his family. Achan had been trouble from the beginning, constantly throwing things, swearing, all for the sake of getting his father�s attention. He didn�t ever get his father�s attention though. It was during the war when Achan was adopted, he was a secret Severus had kept from everyone until after the war. Achan was a muggle child; he held no magic and was neglected. The hazel-eyed child had felt abused, he went to jail for a few years, and then just recently got out. Achan was twenty-nine, but acted like a rash, immature child.
�Achan, I asked you a question. What the fuck are you doing here? You let yourself out of this family a long time ago.� Achan inhaled his cigarette and laughed, �And what may I ask is so funny?�
�You.� Achan let out a cold laugh, �Your face.� Achan let out another laugh. �Your family. Everything about you. The fact that even after I let you down and went to prison that you will let me live in your house. I know you Severus.� The man spat out the name as if it was something foul, and sour.
�How do you know that? Maybe I have changed Achan Ezra Snape.�
The dark-maroon-haired boy hissed at his full name, as if trying to make it go away. �That is not my name Severus!� The man smirked, �I am not a part of your family anymore. I will never be part of that family. I refuse to be. I�m not some queer that this family seems to be breeding.� He inhaled his cigarette deeply and blew the smoke into Severus�s face.
�Achan, Achan, Achan... what will I ever do with your lying, cheating, thief of an ass.� Severus was not one to swear, but his former son had always brought out the worst in him. �You went to jail for fraud and now you stand here like nothing happened! Like nothing happened... you are a disgrace. I don�t want to say it but you are my son and for that reason I will always allow you to come to my house.�
Achan laughed and looked at his father, he flicked his cigarette bud at the man. �I need a place to stay, my girlfriend-�
�The whore?�
�MY GIRLFRIEND is going to be here as well.� Snape grimaced, �And you have no say in the matter, she�s already packed and in fact she in on her way now.� Snape growled and looked at his son in disgust. Achan laughed and walked into the house, �You should be happy I went outside to smoke.� The boy took out another cigarette, �Because now I�m going to do it inside.�
�The hell you aren�t.� Severus snatched the cigarettes out of his eldest son�s hand, Remus came in and looked on wide-eyed. �Get in your room and I�ll escort your girlfriend into your room when she arrives and you better not conceive any children while you are here. Only Remi and I can do that!�
�What an excellent idea! I hadn�t even thought of that, I�m sure she won�t mind having sex on your sofa, or better yet your bed.� Severus glared at the man before him and turned on his heel and went into the potions lab. He could still hear Achan�s laugh as he Remus came in behind him.
�Don�t worry he won�t be here for long, he never is.� Remus stroked his lover�s cheek, �Shush now, plus your gonna leave soon for Hogwarts soon so he�ll have to leave as well.� Remus came up behind Severus and wrapped his arms around his lover.
�I... I have that disease Remus.� The black-haired man turned around facing his lover, �I went and took the test because you wanted me to... I have it Rem... I have it.� The golden-eyed wolf looked up at those black eyes that were gleaming with tears. �I�m gonna die Remus... I�m gonna die just like all the other people in my family.�
Remus embraced the man before him as he broke down, whispering sweet nothings into the greasy locks.
(&)
�I want you to be at you best behavior Bari, I know you don�t like Tristram... and his boyfriend is coming over to. Snape gave me a heads up, he said Tristram got a new tattoo and that his boyfriend is emotional, pregnant, and abused.� Bari rolled his eyes, �He also dresses a little oddly,� Bari went to open his mouth, �Yes, odder then Tristram and Uncle Sev.�
Becan came into the room and signed that it was time to go, �Okay Dad, I know. I won�t instigate anything.� Draco smiled and hugged his black-haired son.
(&)
�Orran you are going to have a talk with Draco... about your recent... predicament.� The boy�s multicolored eyes looked up at the black eyes before him. Orran was dressed in his normal black clothing, black pants with multiple zippers and a black t-shirt with fishnet underneath. Black leather bands were snapped across his wrists hiding scars. �He�s going to enlighten you on your choices, he�s not for or against either, he�s just going to tell you the facts of his life.� Orran nodded and looked at Tristram.
Orran smiled at his boyfriend as Tristram leaned forward and sealed their lips in a kiss. Orran blushed; he was rather shy about displaying affection in front of other people. Tristram was wearing a dark green button-up shirt; it showed the pale skin and black fishnet beneath it since the top few buttons were undone. �Love, it�ll all be fine.� Orran smiled shyly and then leaned forward and placed a chaste kiss on Tristram�s lips, his blue hair fell into his green and blue eyes.
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Tristram�s green hair made Bari�s eyes narrow into mere slits, �Tristram.� The deaf boy greeted in a cool tone, Becan rolled his eyes skyward and elbowed his twin. �I know.� He hissed to the boy with blond hair who was doing a poor job of holding in silent giggles. Bari�s eyes then fell onto a certain pregnant teenage boy who was quivering as he saw Draco.
�Oh, you must be Orran!� Draco greeted cheerfully, �Come on now, lots to chat about.� Draco smiled and placed a hand on Orran�s back, trying to ignore the way the boy flinched. He sat the boy down on the ledge outside the restaurant, where Draco sat down across from him. �Now I am not here to judge or in anyway make you feel like you are a failure. I understand that your father abuses you and in turn has made you pregnant.�
Orran nodded and looked at his shoes, �Not the ideal way for me to get rid of my virginity... I mean my other foster parents hit me but... got rape? That�s just... man.� Draco nodded and then placed his hand on Orran�s chin forcing the boy to look up.
�But you are not a failure, it is not your fault. She in my case it was, in yours it was just a bad thing that happened. Mind you the result of this abuse can either be seen as good or bad.� Orran nodded, and Draco took his hand away from the boy�s chin. When Orran looked down in shame Draco forced it up again, �We are going to do this eye to eye, even if I have to hold you and force you to look at me. You will.�
Draco dropped his hand and Orran flinched a bit, but didn�t look away. The blue-haired teen started stroking his stomach with affection and Draco let a small smile tug at the corners of his mouth. �Now when I got pregnant I was in shambles, my father wanted me to abort. I didn�t as you can tell. I let them think I was gonna put it up for adoption. Then when I gave birth I couldn�t part, and I knew I had to keep them. I ended up at Severus�s door, he let me stay until the twins were past the diaper stage. He then practically kicked me out dealing with his own troubles, and love life.
�I then went and... and I had to find a job. I was a gay, single, poor father. As you can tell that did not get me any job that I desired, I did not finish school which I regret and am now going back for.� Draco looked down and then glanced back up to Orran, �It�s hard for me. I am a prostitute. I needed money so I took the job, it... it pays fairly well. Hell, I�m still here and my boys are healthy.
�You see, everything I did was for my boys. Everything I did was for them. I would give my life for them, I almost did until Severus found me starving on the bed while Bari and Becan were at Hogwarts.� Draco ran his fingers through his hair nervously, �God, I love them.�
Draco looked through the window and smiled fondly as he caught sight of Bari saying some insult to Tristram, only to result in Becan to laugh silently. �That�s the reason I would say to keep it, that even though you will live through hardships... you�ll love the little one or ones. You�ll love them and put everything you want for them. And you�ll never get another chance to father your own child... I mean adoption is great, but that feeling that I passed this kid through my rectum and I�m raising him is a feeling you only get once. But serious consequence in you being so young is something that you don�t want to take lightly. Think for a while and come to a decision.�
Orran smiled and clasped his hands around his stomach with a slightly dreamy look on his face. �Come on, we have people waiting.� Draco said with a smile, �Congrats by the way. You�re a good kid Orran, you�re a good kid.� Orran smiled shyly and blushed.
(&)
Draco came up behind the dark-haired twin and then signed against his back, �You didn�t kill Tristram did you?� Bari laughed and smiled at his father. �Hell I wouldn�t put it past you, you and him are like fire and water. And you happen to be the water...�
Bari then slurred a response, �If only I did kill him, thanks for the idea though Dad. I�ll have to put that plan into action.� His voice startled Orran. The way it seemed like his tongue was too big for his mouth and then he saw the way Draco was signing into Bari�s back.
The dinner consisted of good food, well intended jokes, smutty puns, and many insults that flew between the death boy and Orran�s green-haired boyfriend. Orran noted how Bari signed everything he was saying and how Becan�s eyes followed those hands as if it was some new form of religion that he believed in blindly, the mute boy seemed was memorized by the quick hand jesters and movements.
Tristram�s hand, sometime during the dinner, managed to find Orran�s thigh. Orran had smiled and placed his hand on top of Orran�s. Bari said an early good bye, and ran out to go find his own lover, Keeley. Leaving the pleasant glow of fullness, and the sweet smells good food behind.
�Bari?� Keeley asked rubbing his eyes as he felt someone�s hands wrap around his mid section. He tried to rub the blindness away from his eyes, but he couldn�t and the boy with maroon, curly hair knew that. �Bari don�t scare me like that.� Keeley signed.
�Sorry, love.� Bari signed back. �I�m going to my boarding school... you know Hogwarts.� Keeley gasped, but the gasp wasn�t heard by either of the two boys. �Yeah, I know it sucks, but...� Keeley grasped Bari�s hands, it had the same affect as if Keeley had placed a finger to someone, who was speaking, lips.
�I go to a wizarding school too.� Keeley signed to his boyfriend. Bari smiled and hugged the blind boy that was currently happily wrapped up in his arms. �We can write by owl.� Bari smiled and nodded at what his boyfriend was signing and placed a kiss on his lover�s lips.
