"Did Bobby,.. hurt you?" he asked.

"No, no. Never." She paused, choking on her words. "It was my stepfather. I was little."

The rage that flooded his heart manifested itself on his face, and he was glad she couldn't see it. Everything in him wanted to hunt down and kill the bastard that had done this to her. It was primal, an instinctual, overpowering compulsion for vengeance. Then Harry was hit with every taunt and every manipulation that he, himself, had put her through while he was undercover, and he felt sick with shame.

He wanted to fall at her feet, but he lay over her instead and held the back of her head in his hands."I'm sorry, I'm sorry...I'm so sorry Diane."

After a few minutes she took a deep breath and went on, "It's just that I learned to, to separate my life. What happens to me and what I feel aren't connected anymore. I guess I had to disconnect them to survive."

Harry rolled over and lay next to her, stroking her hair as she continued. "I don't talk about it because I don't want anyone looking at me like I'm broken, and I don't want you preoccupied with thinking how you're going to keep me safe."

"You're a great cop, Diane. Everybody knows that," he said, trying to be encouraging.

"Yeah well, the other side of the coin is the bad stuff, right? She's one great cop, so cool, SO in control." Diane was angry now.

She slammed her hand on the floor.

"Dammit, I'm tired of shutting down everytime I start to feel something, but it's like I'm on automatic pilot! I don't want to lose another friend without having ever really known them. I don't want to be afraid of needing you because I lost Bobby."

"I've been trying to make some changes of habit, as well," he said clearing his throat.

"I know you have. If I weren't sober too, I'd just get drunk, chalk up the last year to fate.. But Katherine said that everything that's happened this past year has been for a reason; that it's leading me to something greater, and well, I think she's right. I want to live and REALLY feel and find out what it is."

"How, Diane? How are you going to do that?"

"I don't know," she sighed. "But there's just no getting around the fact that you, Harry Denby, are part of it."

He loved finally being a part of something, even if he didn't know what it was. Harry now had a mission, and he would stick to it whatever it took. But at the moment, there was a gorgeous woman beside him who had given him a precious jewel, her trust.

And he felt like a king.