Kona, HI (Sept. 30, 1999) The H_O_N_D_A Press has declared incumbent Gary Winklosky to be the winner for the office of Susan's Husband. Though the vote will not take place until October, 7 1999, it is being reported that he secured his re-election based on a strong showing this past week in Kona.

 The recent campaign trail led Winklosky from his Illinois headquarters through Wisconsin, Mississippi, New Jersey, Nebraska, South Carolina, and Hawaii; plus brief stops in California and Georgia. Another stop is scheduled this weekend for North Carolina.

 One analyst credits Gary with running a realistic campaign. He basically was able to follow the "is the union better off now than it was four years ago" approach as a base line. Plus, Susan is a straight shooter, so it was good that he didn't throw out a lot of superficial campaign promises that other candidates make such as promising to commit more resources to household chores, cutting waste from computer game time, or the popular "More Nooners" platform.

 When Susan was asked about how the week went she said, "Terrific." Another analyst noted that her comments, while succinct as always, speak volumes. "If they can survive an 11 mile hike in a constant rain, and actually have a good time, they have something pretty special."

 Success in this election marks a much needed change in momentum for Winklosky, who learned last month that his term as Favorite Son In Law will end in late June of next year with the marriage of Susan's sister, Diane.

 When asked about the campaign Winklosky said, "You'd think running unopposed wouldn't require so much travel."

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