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| 2003 (slowly recovering.) |
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| 2003 JANUARY TOO FAST/BULEMIA We went too fast. The pain seems to grow. Why couldnt I wait? I curl up and cry. No relief. From the feelings inside. I promised to stop, And I have. No escape from my fears. We went too fast. Eat to console. I made you want more. Make myself sick. I know it is wrong. I wont slit, My wrists this time. Why am I doing this? What happens now? (1st) CONFUSION All those words still hurt. Can i forgive, The one who 'said' them? Betrayed, By one I thought I could trust. Who proved me wrong. I was a fool, I am a fool, If I give him another chance. He took my life, Tore it apart, Threw it back. Now wants to re-start. Will I let him, Hurt me again? (20th) Watched the blood flow, From my wrist. Swore I'd never again, Take this risk. My life means more, Than his words. I'm not a slut or a whore. I am a person, A girl inside. I cannot cope, With all his lies. (20th) VALENTINE From an acorn grew a tree, One short moment endeared you to me. It grew and grew despite many storms, We're still here. The tree did not fall. Winter yule log on the fire, Could not outmatch our desire. Christmas past, New year too. We're still here, Me and you. The tree may yet live a very long time. All this my weird way to say, Will you be my valentine? (26th) FEBRUARY DAISY LOVE I love him, I love him not. Each daisy petal fell to the floor. Like another I loved not, Thrown away once more. Now finally at last, I reach the daisy's heart. All my die are cast. I loved him from the start, And will love him forever more. (4th) I WANT....... When you're not here, I long to be with you. When I'm with you, I want to touch you. When we are close, I want to know your thoughts, feelings, everything. When you tell me how you feel, I want it to last forever. If you ever want to leave, I wont be able to let go. (17th) JELEOUSY Jeleousy-a cursed emotion, A curse of mine. Watch her from across the room. Watch her smile as she talks to you. Know that some day soon, You'll hurt her again. SAFE DANGER Messed up. My emotions die. I sit here, Try not to cry. I love him still, Yet care for you. I never thought, I'd break too soon. Before that moment, Triggered by a kiss' I never thought, You felt like this. (Thought I was safe getting pissed, Until that moment when we kissed.) (24th) MARCH FICKLE WORLD Smile, And the world doesnt notice. Cry, And you'll cry alone. This world doesnt care about the person you are. It cares only for the act. It's all about the clothes you wear, The things you say, The way you seem to look at life. They dont want the person inside. They wont help with the pain. They say they are your friend. But cry, And they will leave again. To this world, Emotions dont count. (3rd) |
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