Will You Marry Me?
Perhaps those four little words hold no fear for you but if you are one of the many women out there, like me, they scare the crap out of you. It's not the commitment that scares you it's the monser that comes with those words, and that is The Wedding.
Sure, it's great in the begining. Everything is wonderful in those days or weeks of euphoria after you have become engaged to the most wonderful person in the world. But once that euphoria wears off reality sets in and you realize you have to plan a wedding and you don't have a clue what to do or where to start.
You pick up wedding magazines and your head swims with images of elegant weddings that only the rich and famous can make realities. Then you get depressed becuase you can't have your dream wedding and not go bankrupt. Welcome ladies, you have entered the ring of hell Dante never told you about, Wedding Planning.
They say this is the happiest day of your life but in reality this is a day you will work your butt off to make perfect for everyone, not just yourself. Maybe you have to incorporate two religions, or perhaps you are trying to make it so universal that no one religion is represented. Perhaps you have feuding family members that cannot see each other or heads will roll. Perhaps some of your guests have dietary nedds or allergies that you have to consider as you plan. There are an infinite amount of possibilities for things you have never thought of to suddenly come up and kick your planning behind back to aquare one.
And of course, there is the absentee groom. More often that not the groom has very little to do with the planning of the wedding. He's more of a chauffer, getting you tot he food tasing and other meetings. Ask him for an opinion of flowers or colors and you may get the universal response of "whatever you want is fine by me homey." That may make you think he doesn't care about the wedding and you may be right, but that doesn't mean he doesn't love you. The bottom line - He could care less what happens that day, so long as you two end up hitched the day is a success to him. Now, I say this not to degrade the groom, not all of them are as hands off as the aforementioned stereotype, some of them jump right in and plan the whole deal. But there's a reason we have a stereotypical groom, you all know who you are, and we still love you.
If you feel turned off to the whole wedding process already, congrats, you have allowed a little does of reality to enter into your romantic heart. But that doesn't mean you have to stop dreaming about your perfect day. It can still happen and with your feet firmly planted back on the ground you are now ready to get to work on your wedding. I will do my best to tell you how I went about planning my own wedding. from the rials and tribulations that made me cry and want to give up on the whole thing, to the surprising and amazing lengths people will go to help you and support you. As you plan you will learn who your friends are and sometimes who your real family is too. It may surprise you to find out that the people you thought were the ones you could depend on are the ones who will let you down first. It's a crazy, fun, awful, stressful rollercoaster ride. So hold on to that lap bar becuase here we go! |
