EPISODE 7
Recap by Gordon Pepper
Original Airdate:  October 24, 2001

Welcome to the Pre-Halloween episode of The Amazing Race. In this episode, 2 people will be dressing up as an eliminated team. Which people? Well let's find out...

We start the episode by everyone getting pissed at The Husband and Husband team for their shenanigans from last episode. Team Guido has now gotten the name 'Team Bert and Ernie' from the rest of the teams. Well if that is true, then what does that make their furry pal Grover? (Oh, I better stop now before the Children's Television Workshop come after me with a blunt wooden mallet).

Frank and Margarita start out first and they have a detour - either ride a set of bikes to the next destination - or get a taxi ride there - after spending some time in an airplane glider. Frank and Margarita decide C. None of the above and use the Fast Forward  (after four episodes without it - we finally get to see it) - this allows a team to go straight to the end of the lap - but a team can only use it once ever. The objective is to find the Fast Forward in the moat by Ferrara Castle. Frank, who speaks Italian, talks to the driver who knows where the castle is, so away they go.

Team Guido decide to go bike riding. The Lawyers take the glide route, as do the Frat Pack, who don't want to get stuck with Bert and Ernie (though Im not sure the Greeks have enough coordination to ride a bike). Nancy and Emily decide to go biking, as do Lenny and Karyn, who have called themselves 'Team Butthead' after last episode (I'm not feeling much love here - are you?)

Frank and Margarita find the fast forward - which will send them to Agra, India - they go to the airport without much problem and they are on their way to New Delhi. The bicyclists are on their way to nowhere, as they are all following each other and are getting lost in the process. The Frat Boys are on their way to having some donuts and coffee, as the Lawyers get to the gliders first and all the Greeks can do is to wait their turn until the Lawyers are done. Gee Nancy and Emily look real happy to see the Guidos, don't they?

Everyone is getting lost on the bikes - or learning how to unsuccessfully ride them. The Lawyers get out of the plane (If you haven't heard 'One Million Lawyers' by Tom Paxton yet - please do so - you'll really appreciate it now..) Both Frat boys get on the plane - and go flying - does that plane really look sturdy enough to hold both of them?

Team Guido gets to the end first - and find the next destination - Red Fort Marketplace, India.  There is no flight directly there, and when they get to the airport, they see the Lawyers are right behind them. Since there is no direct flight, the Guidos decide to take a train to get to Milan  airport. The lawyers catch 'Bert and Ernie' and take the same train.

Meanwhile, Team Familia Femalia (yes, Nancy and Emily are the only dual female team left) and Team Butthead finally find the clue to get to India - but they get there before the Frat Boys. The 3 of those teams team up to get the plane. The 3 teams try to stall while Kevin is getting the flight info - and they're stalling long enough to bring the train conductor down to bitch-slap all of them. They successfully stall, though, as Nancy and Kevin get the information, and away they go.

Let's see what going on with Frank and Margarita. Team F/M are already in New Delhi, and get to Agra, and are in first. And thats all we get to see of them this episode. Yee Haw. NEXT!

The new triple threat alliance get to Milan airport and fly to Copenhagen. They run into the Lawyers and Team Guido - so the other 5 teams are together when they get to New Delhi. Such love and togetherness (awwwwww).

The teams find out the ugly truth about India - they are a very poor people who, when they see toursist, see 2 things, a free ride to go anywhere, and free money. All of the teams get approached by the teams - and none of them pay them money. Wonder where we get the term 'Ugly Americans' from?

It's a ride to the finish as we get to see cows, and arches, and bikini thong-wearing beauty queens (ok, maybe not the beauty queens). The lawyers and Team Butthead get stopped for the toll - or a toll hike. Meanwhile, kids stop by and ask Nancy and Emily for money - well maybe New York isn't as different as New Delhi, after all.

This Roadblock is simple - hire a rickshaw and find a shopkeeper, who has the directions to the final destination. After a lovely montage of people running around in rickshaws and Indians waving for the camera, team Guido gets a sculpture of the Taj Mahal, which is where to go - Taj Khema Hotel (near the Taj Majal), is the final destination. Karyn finds it next, then the Lawyers and Team Guido. Nancy finally finds it - but she is in dead last. Can she and Emily make up the time?

Team Butthead have to tell some Indian families that they aren't getting a free trip to Taj Mahal. But Nancy makes the runner-up dumbass move of the episode by taking wayyyy too long and asking the natives where to go, instead of going to the taxi stand and asking them (they should have some sort of idea where the Taj Mahal is, shouldn't they?). Nancy knows she took too long too, as she has a bout with angst right before the next commercial break.

Emily has been waiting for 9 years for her mom...well maybe not, but she's been waiting for a while while the rest of the teams go by. Surprisingly enough (or maybe not), the Taxi drivers don't know much more than the contestants apparently, as they are all clueless. The kids and adolescents are looking for money and Emily is calling the Indian people bad names and are making fun of them as she and Nancy both break down in the car together. The sympathetic Indians (who don't realize that they are being made fun of) push the car on the way to Agra.

Lenny and Karyn's Taxi driver makes the dumbass move of the episode by not knowing where they are and trying to milk more money from them in order to get to the right direction. All of the teams are having problems with the taxi drivers as none of them know where to go. Both the Lawyers and the Frat Pack switch drivers but Team Guido is the only group to find a competent driver and they come in second place. The Lawyers, who about to write their own vacation pass out of there, come in third and team Greek come in fourth. Nancy and Emily, who also thought they were toast, come in fifth and scream and hug each other (awwwww) - and get a round of applause. Not so lucky are the last place Team Butthead, who can now start looking for Beavis, since they now have plenty of time to do it.

Whereas Paul and Amie's trip ended in I love you, I love you too, kiss kiss kiss, Lenny and Karyn blame the other person for the fact that they are in last and realize that they are 2 different people. Iloveouybuhbye to the team, and Iloveyoubuhbye to the relationship. I don't think this is what the producers had in mind.

To be continued...