Whatcha doin? Fuggin click the touch me button.

holy Toledo!! this is chapter 1!!!

Chapter 2!!!Read it or i'll kick your ass!!!

Dear Abby! I have a severe case of boredom! What should I do? Dipshit in Ovalville.

How many licks does it take? With me? Not very many.....

Touch me

Click it you fuggin bloody idiot. ] 

Dear Highman,

    I feel like such a loser. I ask girls out all the time and they always say no. I'm not an ugly guy. I am nice to people. I'm funny and nice to women. What should I do?

                Loser via Email

Dear Loser,

    Harry shot the sheep. Download some porn. 

 [email protected]  

Support Doug's date fund. Send him money. 

[Doug claims the right to be self-centered. If you feel you know of something else he should be centered around, please inform of your thoughts.]

Due to bandwith restrictions, I am not allowed to put downloads on here. HorseCrap.