Disclaimer: I don’t own the BCS board or its residents, or pretty much anything else appearing in this fic, except for any and all trout.
Robin, the Crossover Junkie: *voiceover* “Previously, on GA’s boardfic and Anthony’s Survivor fic....”
______________________________________
’69 Gremlin: *facing VS, the
only boarder standing, with an evil grin* “You people like fish almost as much
as the Boss, and he spends his spare time filming the bottom of the ocean....”
As he opens a portal to 1969
to use on VS, he is suddenly tackled from behind... by GA.
’69 Gremlin: “You fool!
The portal’s out of control! We
could both be sucked in!!!!”
GA: “Erin! The lever!!!”
VS looks and sees she’s standing next to a lever marked “trout release” and
connected to the containers of trout above GA and the ’69 gremlin. She gulps, tears in her eyes, and reaches
for the lever....
VS: “Close your eyes....” *she pulls the lever*
With that, a massive pile of trout fall atop the struggling pair, causing the portal to flare completely out of control. There’s a bright flash, and when it clears, the ’69 gremlin, the trout, and GA are gone.
From Survivor, Chapter W:
The last day of Homecoming.
Anthony sits in the lobby, waiting for his bus. Green Armadillo walks into the lobby.
ANTHONY: You? I thought you'd be half way home by now.
GA drops a bag of comics.
ANTHONY: That's a lot to be wagering.
GREEN ARMADILLO: I've got to know.
Shot from behind Anthony of GA in the distance. Shot from behind GA of
Anthony in the distance. In the shot, we see trouts come down, wrapping around
GA's hands.
Black.
__________________________________________________
Kellner: *packing bags* “Everything is going perfectly as I planned. Which means it’s time for me to go pay a visit to my favorite board’s homecoming.... to gloat!”
Suddenly, Kellner hears a noise from the stairwell leading to the roof.
Kellner: “Who’s there?”
The door opens to reveal the beaten body of James Van Der Beek.
Kellner: “Van Der Beek! You fool! You lost to those boarders?! And why have you dared show your face here?! You know the plan depends on people not realizing we’re working together....”
Van Der Beek’s body is kicked into the room, revealing standing behind him....
Anthgelus: “The plan’s changed.”
A run down chat room lies mostly empty. Empty except for the worn figures of... Spot and Larry.
Larry: “If only those boarders hadn’t destroyed the Central Programming Grid... everyone in the world would still be the devoted fans of the WB....”
Spot: “Pika....”
Larry: “And I would have liked it if Bravenet hadn’t reduced your vocabulary to that of Pikachu again.”
Bravenet: “Silence, fools! If it hadn’t been for your incompetence....”
*suddenly, the door is blown in by a rocket*
Talia: *holding a flame thrower at ready* “You’d STILL be toast.”
F=j: *lowering her rocket launcher* “Did ya miss us?”
Miesl-Dru: “I’ve got a few words for you regarding some mind control....”
Bravenet: “No! Not you people again! Why must you thwart my plans?!”
Bagel: “Well, I’m not sure it’s totally fair to call them YOUR plans. After all, the WB was responsible for setting up the Dawson’s Freak control grid.”
Bravenet: “So I took over when I got the chance after the WB’s plan proved more successful than they could have expected. It was STILL MY world!”
A voice softly croaks from the corner: “N... no.....”
F=j: “KELLNER!!!!!!” *she reloads her rocket launcher to toast him*
Ozzie: “Wait, f=j.... we thought he was dead...”
Kellner: “Why....? Why?!”
Roxymoron: “Maybe because you suck?”
Kellner: “Why did you cut your hair, Keri, why? And why did I cancel Buffy?!”
Talia: “I think he’s lost it.”
Bagel: “I think he lost it a LONG time ago.”
Kellner: *seriously* “It wasn't supposed to go down like this. Nobody saw him coming. I figured it for Ant's big day. But I thought he was here to stop the Freaks, not to bring them forth. Then Van Der Beek had to think he was a big shot, tell Anthony how to do things. Then he reverted to Anthgelus....”
Ozzie: “The entire thing was a publicity stunt... you thought you’d play chicken with Joss Whedon for long enough, and you’d keep the show citing the dedication of your fans... the whole Dawson’s thing was just to get us to cooperate in your scheme... and you would have gotten better ratings than ever.”
Kellner: “Yes! But Anthgelus changed everything! There was only one way to stop him. And that was impossible, because the temporal displacement capacitor did not exist back then...”
Miesl-Dru: “But you’d only need one of those in order to resolve a temporal anomaly....”
Roxymoron: “Of course... THAT’S what happened to.....”
Talia: “Well, I’ve had some experience with time travel before. I think we can solve that particular problem, and stop this particular mess from ever happening. Let’s go.”
The boarders head out.
Bravenet: “You can’t leave! I am the coolest chat on the internet!”
F=j: “You’re the sorriest excuse for a chat the world has ever seen, and the only reason you’re still around is because you’ve got three prisoners here to subject to your suckiness. Without anyone using you, you’re dead.”
Larry: “Let us out... please...”
Spot: “Pika... pika!”
F=j: “I don’t ever want to see either of you two again.”
Spot: “PIKA!!!!”
Kellner: “I’m free!”
F=j: “I didn’t say YOU could go anywhere.”
Kellner: “But.... Bravenet....”
F=j: “Well, let me think here.... you cancelled Buffy.... you engineered a scheme to brainwash the entire world with the bad programming that remained on your pathetic excuse for a network... and you’re an idiot. I think you two deserve each other.”
Bravenet: *walks up, puts an arm on Kellner’s shoulder* “I’m the coolest chat on the Internet!”
Kellner: “NNNNOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!”
Robin: *looking around the aftermath of the
’69 gremlin attack* “What a mess.... we’re going to need to re-wallpaper.”
SocKs: “Whoo hoo!”
Bracken: “We’ve got bigger problems. Someone trashed the Van Der Beek residence,
no sign of Anthony... Anthgelus... or Mitsy.
Kira: “What about Kellner?”
Bracken: “His office too. Who knows where they’ve gone.”
VS: “More importantly, how do we turn
Anthgelus back into Anthony before we have to hurt him?”
Hazel: “I don’t know. Why is everyone looking at me? Because I was Vincent Schiavelli last chapter?”
(ED NOTE: Vincent Schiavelli played Jenny’s uncle, a fun fact that I had no
idea of, but Hazel did)
Laura: “Say, didn’t he die in that episode?”
Hazel: *turns pale as a sheet* “No! I don’t wanna die in another fic! Listen, gremlin people, just cause I was
gypsy uncle guy last chapter doesn’t mean I know too much! Really, I don’t know how to restore
Anthony’s soul!”
Berry: “Don’t worry about it, we’ve got the
answer right here in The Book.”
*scrolls up The Book on a computer*
Hazel: *reading from The Book* “To restore
the soul of Anthgelus, he must hook up with his one true love.”
VS: *arms crossed, knocks on GA’s computer
monitor* “Aren’t you in enough trouble these days as is?”
GA: *sitting at the computer writing fic,
ponders that for a moment* “Oh, alright.”
*scratches this paragraph from the fic*
VS: *reading from The Book* “In order to
restore the soul of Anthgelus, it is necessary that he be neutered,
post-haste.”
Hazel: *glaring at GA* “HEY!”
GA: *sighs, scratches THIS paragraph from the
fic*
F=j: *reading from the book* “When the soul
of Anthony departs, leaving only Anthgelus...”
GA: *sternly* “Evil one....”
F=j: “What?”
*innocent look*
GA: “Please tell me whatever your idea is
won’t require me to make more of a mess of this section of my fic.”
F=j: *sobs* “I never get to be evil!”
GA: *looking skeptically* “You just got to
condemn Kellner to eternity with Bravenet.”
F=j: “Oh yeah!” *perks up, wanders off happily*
GA: *sigh*
Heather: “Oooh! Oooh! Can I read?”
GA: *covering face with hands* “At this
point, I don’t see why not....”
Heather: *riff, riff* “You’re being
mean. Paaaaaain!!!”
Bob: *grabs the book, tries to run off with
it*
Bracken: “Hey, isn’t that a website? What did he do, take the computer off the
table?”
GA: *sobs*
Lydia: *reading from the book* “To restore
the soul of Anthgelus, it is necessary to broadcast the writings.”
Erinn: “What writings?”
Lydia: “It doesn’t say.”
Bowen: “So basically, my dad is running
around somewhere without a soul and bent on brainwashing the world, and we
don’t know where?”
Kuzibah: “Wait a minute.... maybe he’s where
WE are all supposed to be right now....”
SocKs: “Oh god... the homecoming! I’d completely forgotten in all the
chaos....”
Kira: “He wouldn't dream of missing it....”
VS: “Especially as Anthgelus, he’d find it
necessary to show us all how he’d won....”
Saria Angel: “Great. What else can go wrong?”
BCS Homecoming, Chicago
Ant is sitting in the lobby, patiently
waiting. The ’69 Gremlin walks into the
lobby.
Ant: “You?
I thought you’d be halfway back to that cave of yours by now, especially
after I took care of Van Der Beek.”
’69 Gremlin: “No, you didn’t.” *throws down a bag of comics*
Ant: “That’s a lot to be wagering.”
’69 Gremlin: “I need to know.” *a pair of trout slide down his sleeves, one
into each hand*
The two charge each other, crossing the room
in the blink of an eye, and turn to face each other again.
Ant: *wiping a small trickle of blood from
his cheek* “Not bad, you drew blood.
That hasn’t happened in as long as I can remember.”
’69 Gremlin: “I’m going to do a lot more than
that. After all, I’m evil now.”
Anthgelus: *game face* “What do you
know? So am I.”
’69 Gremlin: *takes a step back in fear*
“Ant... Anthgelus?!”
Anthgelus: *evil grin* “Did you miss me?”
BCS war room
Suddenly, bos bursts into the room.
Bos: “Guys!
We’ve got a problem!”
Lindsers: “What now?”
Bos: “When everyone thought I was frightened
of the ’69 gremlin....”
JodithGrace: “You were convincing...”
Bos: “Well, I was actually luring him close
enough to get a sample for a multiple restriction fragment length polymorphism
test....”
Everyone: “HUH?!”
Bos: “DNA fingerprinting. I was hoping to find out why the gremlin
suddenly picked up the ability to affect any post it chose to with the ’69 bug
after its fight with GA, and after I saw that Saria and Jodith are for some
reason immune to its power, I compared it’s DNA to theirs.”
Roxymoron: “What.... did you find?”
Bos: “Jodith and Saria are immune to the
powers of the ’69 gremlin because.... 50% of their DNA is a PERFECT match for
its....”
Saria: “But... how can that be? The only people who should have that level
of a match with us are our parents.....” *her voice trails off suddenly, with a
slight sob as she realizes what that means*
Lindsers: *in tears* “But.... how?”
VS: “He was sucked into the temporal vortex
with it....”
Bos: “And now Green Armadillo shares a body
with... the 1969 Gremlin!”
TO BE CONTINUED......
Back to GA's boardfic page.