Disclaimer: I don’t own any characters or shows appearing on the WB, or any members of the BCS or ViV list extended community appearing in this fic.  All trout appearing herein, however, are my own......

 

BCS Board, the present

 

At GLR headquarters, SocKs, Greeneyes, Lindsers, and Anthony are seated around a table, eating Golden Graham treats.  Anthony is hard at work writing the next part of his hit BCS board “Survivor” fic, making use of GA once again to do the Wayne’s World flashback noise.  Meanwhile, the girls are talking about the latest recruitment drive, with membership over 560 as it stands.  Suddenly the phone rings.  Ant keeps typing away, while Lindsers, Greeneyes, and SocKs just look at each other for a moment.  Then they all break for the phone.

 

Greeneyes: *jumps over Lindsers*

Lindsers: Hey!  You bent my Riley!

Greeneyes:  What?!  *stops in dismay*

SocKs: *reaches the phone*  HA!  *to the phone*  Thank you for calling GLR!

Mysterious Voice: Is this your leader?

SocKs:  Uh... yeah, why?

Lindsers and Greeneyes panickedly attempt to repair the Riley doll

Voice: There’s a spoiler of great import to your organization.....

SocKs: What?  MB and Joss haven’t said anything major yet.....

Voice: It isn’t strictly Buffy related..... the word is that Riley will be paying visits to other shows.... Every show on the WB..... I’d check it out if I were you.  *hangs up*

SocKs: That was odd.

Greeneyes and Lindsers finish repairing the Riley doll

Lindsers: Who was that?

SocKs: I don’t know... but they said something very.... Disturbing.

Greeneyes:  What?

SocKs: They said there are plans to have Riley cross-over into other WB shows.

Everyone:  What?!

SocKs: This could mean trouble, if it’s true.

Lindsers: But how do we know that it wasn’t some crazy guy?

SocKs: We don’t, but this bears following up.  I mean, who would be crazy enough to completely make this up?  Can you guys investigate?

Greeneyes: Sure.  I’ll poll the organization, talk to other spoiler sites, see what I come up.

Lindsers:  Okay, I’ll try to get in touch with MB.  If Riley’s crossing-over, he’ll have to know about it.

SocKs:  Thanks.  And try to keep things low profile.  I can’t stand it when people fight over this, and I’m SURE the Dark Side might have that reaction if they find out.....

Greeneyes: Right.

Lindsers:  Okay.  Come on, Ant, we’re off to find Riley!

Anthony:  Off to find Riley.... That’s it!  How to get myself off this island without voting myself off!  Lindsers wants to elope with Riley, and I’m going to win her back, by force if necessary!  I’m brilliant!

 

DS inner sanctum

(Being a GLR commando, I know nothing of the workings of the DS inner sanctum, so let’s just say they’re doing DS inner sanctumy things.)

The phone rings.  The DS’ers look at each other in preparation for making a mad rush for the phone when suddenly a loud “click” is heard.

 

F=j: *loading rocket launcher*  Anyone want the phone?  *waves launcher menacingly*  I didn’t think so.  *goes over and picks up phone, doesn’t say hello or anything but barks into the phone*  WHAT?!

Mysterious voice on phone:  Uh.....this is the Dark Side, isn’t it?

F=j:  Hey!  Who gave U this number?  I’ll bet it was someone from my list!  They’re SOOO gone.... *reaches for flame thrower*

Voice:  No, that’s not the point!  I have a very important spoiler you NEED to know about!

F=j: Listen buddy, I don’t care that this is a phone and not IM, one more word and you’re getting a WARNING.

Voice:  But.... Riley is crossing over to all the other WB shows!

F=j: Oh SURE.  I really believe that.  *about to hang up phone*

Voice: And... uh.... He’s going to hook up with Liz Parker on Roswell!

F=j:  AAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!! 

 

F=j slams the phone down, starts storming towards the door as the DS’ers back away from her slowly.  She looks back at them. 

 

F=j: Well?  Aren’t you coming?

Max:  Uh.... Where are we going?

F=j: The same place we go every night!  To kill Riley!

 

DS’ers nod assent with this plan

 

Fred: *sitting in the corner, depressed*  But I wore out my whip on the Survivor island!

F=j: *holds up a small card which says “Forgwyn’s Watcher’s Card:  Don’t even think about leaving home WITH it, this means YOU f=j!”* Get a new one.

Fred: *grins evilly*  I’m in.

 

 

Board Central

AnGel X, Kurupt, and Riv are discussing the latest in board happenings.

 

BM: I can’t BELIEVE the number of people who sent me this stupid “Riley’s going to be on every WB show” so-called spoiler.

Kurupt:  Yeah.  I mean, who needs to see a naked guy on more shows?  I mean, if it were SMG that’d be one thing......

BM: *glares at him*

Riv: *slaps him upside the head*  Cut that out!

Kurupt:  Sorry.  *starts collecting topless SMG pics for COTN*

Riv:  Well, BM, I know it isn’t sensible, but these things usually blow over eventually.

Kurupt:  Yeah, I mean at least we don’t have 30 name-less newbies posting it in all-caps all over the board, not responding to threads, bashing the character and actor, and generally breaking all the rules on the board.

 

BM and Riv look at K horrified as he says this, and sure enough said posts materialize on the board as they watch.

 

BM: You said it, Shaun, YOU’RE loading the delete page.

 

 

On AIM

 

Talia hesitantly types in her password, barely remembering it after 20 years.  Looking at her watch, she realizes it’s 4 AM EST, so there prolly isn’t anyone on.  Up comes her buddy list, showing Heather and BoB online.

 

Talia: Heather!  BoB!  I haven’t seen you guys in SOOOOO long!

BoB: Yeah, it’s been a good day or two.  Weren’t you grounded?

Talia: *realizes that they HAVE seen the Talia of the present recently* Uh... yeah, I just snuck on cause there’s something VERY important!

Heather: What is it?

Talia: It’s Larry!  He made up the whole Riley Crossover rumor thing to provoke a board war!

BoB: Not HIM again.....

Heather: Yeah, I haven’t seen him since the “Cutie 2000” chat.  Who told you this, Talia?

Talia:  Well, Green was explaining it to me a bit ago....

BoB: Green Armadillo?

Talia:  Uh... yeah.... Why?

Heather: *looks Talia over*  You’re not thinking about marrying him, are you?  Cause you CAN’T!  He’s forbidden to marry!  Nosiree bob!

BoB: What?

Heather: No, not you, shoosh you!

BoB: Heather, I think GA is the ONLY person who actually shooshes to that.

Heather: Well, people SHOULD!  Especially when I’m their mother!

Talia:  *looking at the two of them edgewise, like they were crazy or something* Are you two married or something?

Heather and BoB turn to her simultaneously: NO!!!

BoB: Where IS GA anyway?

Heather: He’s probably off acting like Wesley in that list of f=j’s again.  “Evil one” indeed.  *riff, riff*

Talia:  Uh... guys?  Plot to destroy the board?  Hello?

 

 

The Marcus Blucas Mansion

*cue music from the Mission Impossible 2 trailer*

Lindsers: *being lowered down an air shaft via cables*  This is SO cool!  Even if the rumors AREN’T true, I’m going to get to meet MB!

Anthony: *operatiing the winch system* Couldn’t we have used the door?  He might have answered?

Lindsers:  Yeah, but this way we might catch him with his shirt off!  There’s a bit I’d like to say to him if I catch him that way.....

Anthony: *mutters* Me too, like ‘STAY AWAY FROM MY WIFE’!

Lindsers: What was that dear?

Anthony: Nothing, honey.

 

Lindsers touches down and starts sneaking through the house.  Suddenly, she bumps into another person, also sneaking around.  They spring away from each other and assume combat poses, which are remarkably similar. 

 

Lindsers: MOM!

F=j: Daughter!

Lindsers: What are you doing here?!

F=j: Ima kill Marcus Blucas!

Lindsers: No!!!!  He’s so dreamy!

F=j: ACK!  I won’t have my daughter going anywhere near him!

 

The two are about to fight when a voice is heard.

 

Marcus Blucas: *wearing a bathrobe, yawning* Who are you people and what are you doing in my house?

Lindsers: *THUD*

F=j:  You!  Even after everything else that you’ve done I STILL didn’t believe that U would hook up with.... HER!  A relationship between Riley and Liz Parker must be stopped at all costs!

Lindsers: *jumps in between them*  No!  I won’t let you!

MB: Uh.... What are you people talking about?

Lindsers and F=j: QUIET!

Anthony: *comes running up, having gotten in through the door*:  Uh, guys, did you hear what MB said?  He doesn’t KNOW about any Roswell crossover!   That means the rumors aren’t true!  He ISN’T going to be on every show on the WB!

 

Lindsers and F=j stop, for a moment, think about that.

F=j:  You’re NOT going to hook up with Liz Parker?

MB: Who’s Liz Parker?

F=j:  Oh.  In that case I’ll let you live... for now....

 

F=j turns to walk away, MB breathes a sigh of relief.  Suddenly the phone rings.  Not wanting to turn his back on everyone, he hits the speaker phone button.

 

MB: Hello?

Voice: Hey Marc!  It’s Joss!

Everyone in the room: JOSS WHEDON?!

Joss: The one and only.  Listen, Marc.....

MB: Yeah?

Joss: About those rumors?  The ones where you’re going to cross over to every show on the WB and hook up with Liz Parker on Roswell?

MB: Yeah... *looking nervous*

F=j: *looking angry, ready to pounce*

Joss:  Well, they’re all true.

Everyone in room: WHAT?!

MB: *nervously* Uh... Joss..... I think now may not be a good time to chat.  In fact I need to RUN.  NOW.  BYE!  *hangs up the phone*

 

An ominous silence fills the room for a moment......

 

 

The secret lair of.... LARRY!  *duh, duh, DUNNNNNNNNN*

Mysterious Voice 1: Well, all is going according to plan.  *steps out of the shadows to reveal.... Larry*

Mysterious Voice 2: Yes indeed.  I’m quite proud of those phonecalls I put in.  Wouldn’t have thought it would be so hard to get the Dark Siders to crusade against Riley, though.  *steps out of the shadows to reveal..... Spot*

Mysterious Voice 3: Never, never underestimate any of these boarders.  They’re more formidable than they look.  And I’m worried about these chronometric readings I’m getting...... *stays hidden, what you think I’m going to give away the identity of the head baddie in part 2?!*

Larry:  Uh..... what?

MV3: Time travel.  I fear that someone has come back in time from the future to attempt to foil our plans.

Spot: They must have discovered our involvement in things!  *pokes Larry*  I KNEW you were too fat to go unnoticed!

Larry:  Hey!

MV3:  ENOUGH!  They do not know of my involvement, so they will not be able to stop us.  We shall just have to start controlling more boarders sooner, to undermime their efforts from within.....

Larry: But if it gets out that I’m involved with the spoilers, the boarders won’t possibly believe them!

MV3:  I think we have a.... *pauses evilly for a moment* ...reliable source.  Don’t you agree, Splatty Boy?

Joss Whedon: *steps out of shadows*  Yes Master.  *a Dawson’s Freak mind control chip is visible at the base of his neck*

 

TO BE CONTINUED..........

Back to GA's boardfic page.