`Bert is Evil!:
Intercepted E-mail Correspondence with Jeffrey Dahmer
  The following is a series of E-mail correspondence between famed murderer/cannibal Jeffrey Dahmer and Bert. Contains violent language, reader's discretion is advised.

      to: Jeffrey Dahmer (jd@ieatkids.com)

      from: Bert (bert@sesamest.com)

      subject: Greetings!

      At 11:37 AM 11/26/94 -0800, Bert wrote:

      Hello Jeffrey! Remember me.. Bert! We met once at the

      Evil People Convention. How's it been hanging?

      I've been busy myself. Are you still doing a lot

      of carving? How's the meat this season?

      Bert

      to: Bert (bert@sesamest.com)

      from: Jeffrey Dahmer (jd@ieatkids.com)

      subject: (re:)Greetings!

      At 8:31 PM 11/27/94 -0700, Jeffrey Dahmer wrote:

      Bert,

      	Of course I remember you! You were the one who gave

      me that recipe for Infant Soup. Thanks a million.

      	I've been fine, the seasons been great, lots of fresh sweet meat.

      I love kids. BTW if I remember right you have a Children related occupation.

      Do you think you can source me some seven year olds?

      Jeffrey

      to: Jeffrey Dahmer (jd@ieatkids.com)

      from: Bert (bert@sesamest.com)

      subject: Kids

      At 9:43 PM 11/27/94 -0800, Bert wrote:

      Jeff,

      Sure I can! How many do you need?

      There are lots of kids here. (nice and plump)

      I'll send you a sample soon.

      Bert

      to: Bert (bert@sesamest.com)

      from: Jeffrey Dahmer (jd@ieatkids.com)

      subject: (re:)Kids

      attachment: Butchering.txt

      At 7:20 PM 11/30/94 -0700, Jeffrey Dahmer wrote:

      Wow, the leg you sent me was excellent! I want more.

      Can I get some by the bulk?

      Also attached is a file on how to prepare the meat.

      This way you can keep the meat in prime condition.

      Jeffrey

      to: Jeffrey Dahmer (jd@ieatkids.com)

      from: Bert (bert@sesamest.com)

      subject: Sweet Meat

      At 6:24 PM 11/31/94 -0800, Bert wrote:

      Jeff,

      Thanks for the text file you sent. It was very

      informative. I'll make sure the next batch of

      meat I'll send over will be prepped this

      way.

      Bert

      back

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