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| MATTHEW TOPHAM |
Steven "Zip-Zip" Ella Eric "The Schlong" Simms Greg "Money Man" Barwick (or Bubbles) 7'2" 100kg to 150kg depending on fitness Dome of Thinking, Knome that's Blinking When Home of Drinking is closed At the same pub as Peter Tate |
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| One of the co-founders of the club, Topham carries the burden of ensuring players are ready to play each week. All of this organising means that Topham has no time left to mentally prepare for the game each week, and as a result he is often found venting his anger at the referees early in the game. Topham took up a lucrative contract in the USA in 1975, and as a result did not participate in the premiership winning Roosters side. He returned in 1971, when he decided that the Seppos can't play footy to save themselves, and he would rather a good game than the cash. Topham is the king of fitness, and often spends 20-30 hours a week in the gym. All this leads to probably the most agile player on the field, who is able to break tackles with one single, decisive run. Topham is also the biggest fan of post-match tinnie consumption, and often pulls up 5-10 minutes before full-time in order to start early on the Cold Gold. He is also a fan of sneaking a quick tinnie in at half time. |