* * * * *
Meisinger and I stand in the grand lobby of the Paris Opera exchanging the obligatory pleasantries with the members of Paris society and accepting the congratulations and well wishes of friends to be passed on to both mother and Allen. I have no doubts about what my mother will accomplish tonight but Allen weighs heavily on my mind. Will he show up at all? If he does will he even play? Will he play well? Dietrich can read my mind as the usher parts the curtain for us to enter our box. With a gesture he waves the usher away and pulls the curtain to our vestibule area closed.
�Patrick, you mustn�t tear yourself up over him. It�s completely affecting your own work. You can�t see it but I can. There�s something missing. Your playing is suffering and it has nothing to do with your hand either. You must put your heart completely back into your work Patrick. Allen may wish to completely self-destruct but that�s his prerogative. But he doesn�t need to take two people with him. You have your own career to think about right now.�
�Dietrich, how can I possibly do that when my heart is breaking? I can�t stand to see my brother like this. I�ve always been able to fix things for him but I haven�t a clue how to make things right now. I love him so much, I just wish to see him happy once.�
�You will Patrick. You will. I love him as well and of course I want the same.� He takes my face in his hands and continues. �I love you too Patrick. So very much.� Dietrich puts his arms around me and kisses me on the cheek. He holds me close and I am quite overcome with emotion for I realize at that moment that without him here I would be sitting in this box by myself with no one to talk to about the brother that I love slipping away from our grasp�
Just then the curtain to our little vestibule parts and Allen is suddenly there.
�I�m not interrupting anything am I?� He says in a tone of voice I had never heard before.
�Of course not little brother, in fact it was you we were just talking about. What are you doing up here? Shouldn�t you be in the pit?�
�I�m not needed until the second act remember?�
At that moment the house lights begin to dim.
�Of course, yes. I�m sorry Allen.� I say as I part the curtain for him to step down into the box. �Do sit down.�
Allen chooses the chair to the far left and Dietrich takes the center with me at the right. There�s no time left to talk to Allen for the conductor has taken the podium and receives a very warm welcome from the standing room only crowd. Even in the relative darkness I can see that Allen is looking at me the entire time until the curtain rises on the first act�.
In Jules Massenet�s opera Thais, the heroine does not appear onstage until the latter part of the first act and the anticipation in the house grows steadily until it reaches a truly fevered pitch. When mother finally makes her entrance as the famed Egyptian courtesan the audience interrupts the action to welcome her with an extended ovation. She breaks character for a second to accept the greeting with a slight curtsey then nods to the conductor to proceed. From that point forward she completely mesmerizes the audience but no one notices the brief look she directs toward our box as if to include us as accomplices in her master deception.
