BIRTHDAYS:  Astronomer Percival Lowell, 1855; publisher Walter Annenbert, 1908; Sammy Kaye, 1910; L. Ron Hubbard, 1911; Neil Sedaka, 1939; Deborah Raffin, 1953.

THIS DAY IN HISTORY:

On this date in 1781 Uranus was discovered.

On this date in 1852 "Uncle Sam" was born (full grown, no less) in an editorial cartoon in the New York "Lantern".  The character was based on an officer from the War of 1812, Sam Wilson.

On this date in 1877 a patent was issued to Chester Greenwood for earmuffs.

On this date in 1881 Czar Alexander III was assassinated.

On this date in 1884 World standard time was established.

On this date in 1935 Tennessee outlawed the teaching of evolution.

On this date in 1972 Clifford and Edith Irving pleaded guilty to conspiracy charges.

On this date in 1974 the Arab nations agreed to end their five-month oil embargo.

On this date in 1992 the House of Representatives unanimously voted to publicly identify 355 current Capitol Hill check bouncers.

MEANINGLESS FACTS:  English muffins were first made in America... Venetian blinds were invented by the Chinese... The Belgians were the first to make French Fries.

TRIVIA:  How many calories does one Hershey's Kisses chocolate contain?

     My apologies in advance to those sensitive to humor such as follows -- "My wife and I were happy for 20 years.  Then we met."  Rodney Dangerfield

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Thanks to M/M Riverrats --

Passengers on a Lufthansa flight heard this announcement from the captain, "Ladies and Gentlemen, I am sorry to inform you that we have lost power to all of our engines and will shortly crash into the ocean." The passengers were obviously very worried about this situation, but were somewhat comforted by the captain's next announcement. "Ladies and Gentlemen, we at Lufthansa have prepared for such an emergency, and we would now like you to rearrange your seating so that all the non-swimmers are on the left side of the plane, and all the swimmers are on the right side." After this announcement, all the passengers rearranged their  seating to comply with the captain's request. Two minutes later, the captain made a belly landing in the ocean. The captain once again made an announcement, "Ladies and Gentlemen we have crashed into the ocean. All of the swimmers on the right side of the plane, open your emergency exits and quickly swim away from the plane. For all of the non-swimmers on the left  side of plane...

"Thank You For Flying Lufthansa."

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Thanks to LBS for this one:  Thinking of You With Humor

Sometimes, we wonder why friends send jokes to us without writing a word, maybe this could explain it:

When you are very busy, but still want to keep in touch, guess what you do -- you forward jokes.

When you have nothing to say, but still want to keep in contact, you forward jokes.

When you have something to say, but don't know what, you forward jokes.

To let you know that: you are still remembered, you are still important, you are still loved, you are still cared for, you are still wanted, guess what you get? A forwarded joke from me.

So, dear friend, next time you get a joke, don't think that I have sent you just a joke, but that I have thought of you today, and wanted to send you a smile.

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Thanks to JLLH:   CHRISTIAN BUMPER STICKERS AND SIGNS:

A family altar can alter a family.

A lot of kneeling will keep you in good standing.

Are you wrinkled with burden? Come on in to Church for a faith lift!

Coincidence is when God chooses to remain anonymous.

Do your best and then sleep in peace.  God is Awake.

Don't put a question mark where God put a period.

Exercise daily. Walk with the Lord!

Fear knocked. Faith answered. No one was there.

Forbidden fruits create many jams.

Give God what's right, not what's left!

God doesn't want shares of your life; He wants controlling interest!

God loves everyone, but probably prefers "fruits of the spirit" over "religious nuts"!

God promises a safe landing, not a calm passage.

Having truth decay? Brush up on your Bible!

He who angers you, controls you!

He who is good at making excuses is seldom good for anything else.

He who kneels before God can stand before anyone!

If God is your Co-pilot - Swap seats!

Kindness is difficult to give away because it keeps coming back.

Man's way leads to a hopeless end! God's way leads to an endless hope!

Most people want to serve God, but only in an advisory capacity.

Nothing ruins the truth like stretching it.

Plan ahead. It wasn't raining when Noah built the ark.

The task ahead of us is never as great as the Power behind us.

The Will of God will never take you to where the Grace of God will not protect you.

This Church is "Prayer Conditioned"!

Watch your step carefully! Everyone else does!

We don't change the message, the message changes us.

We set the sail; God makes the wind.

We're too blessed to be depressed.

When God ordains, He sustains.

Wisdom has two parts: 1) Having a lot to say. 2) Not saying it.

Worry is the darkroom in which "negatives" are developed.

You can tell how big a person is by what it takes to discourage him.

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Thanks to JLLH:  THE FAMILY RESEMBLANCE

 The following ideas about science were gleaned from essays, exams, and classroom discussions.  Most were from 5th and 6th graders.

 *  Q:  What is one horsepower?
   A:  One horsepower is the amount of energy it takes to drag a horse 500 feet in one second.

 *  The law of gravity says no fair jumping up without coming back down.

*  When people run around and around in circles we say they are crazy. When planets do it we say they are orbiting.

 *  South America has cold summers and hot winters, but somehow they still manage.

 *  Most books now say our sun is a star.  But it still knows how to change back into a sun in the daytime.

 *  Water freezes at 32 degrees and boils at 212 degrees.  There are 180 degrees between freezing and boiling because there are 180 degrees between north and south.

 *  There are 26 vitamins in all, but some of the letters are yet to be discovered.  Finding them all means living forever.

 *  Vacuums are nothings.  We only mention them to let them know we know they're there.

 *  Some oxygen molecules help fires burn while others help make water, so sometimes it's brother against brother.

 *  Some people can tell what time it is by looking at the sun.  But I have never been able to make out the numbers.

 *  We say the cause of perfume disappearing is evaporation.  Evaporation gets blamed for a lot of things people forget to put the top on.

 *  To most people solutions mean finding the answers.  But to chemists solutions are things that are still all mixed up.

 *  I am not sure how clouds get formed.  But the clouds know how to do it, and that is the important thing.

 *  Water vapor gets together in a cloud.  When it is big enough to be called a drop, it does.

 *  Cyanide is so poisonous that one drop of it on a dog's tongue will kill the strongest man.

 *  Isotherms and isobars are even more important than their names sound.

 *  It is so hot in some places that the people there have to live in other places.

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ANSWER:  25 calories.

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