Good
Morning: It's Thursday February 22, 2001!
BIRTHDAYS:
George Washington, 1732; Frederic Chopin, 1810; Sheldon Leonard, 1907;
Robert Young, 1907; John Mills, 1908; Senator Edward Kennedy, 1932; Julius
Erving, 1950.
THIS
DAY IN HISTORY:
On this
date in 1630 Indians introduced Pilgrims to popcorn.
On this
date in 1862 Jefferson Davis was inaugurated as Confederate President.
On this
date in 1879 Franklin W. Woolworth opened his first five-and-ten cent store
in Utica, NY.
On this
date in 1889 four more stars were added to the flag as North and South
Dakota, Montana and Washington became states.
On this
date in 1924 Calvin Coolidge delivered the first presidential radio broadcast
from the White House.
On this
date in 1973 the U.S. and the People's Republic of China agreed to establish
liaison offices.
MEANINGLESS
FACTS: George Washington gave New York the nickname the "Empire State"...
The only state in the United States to be named after a president is Washington...
A check of today's birthday list shows that Ted Kennedy was born exactly
200 years after George Washington (I fail to find any other comparisons
worthy of mention, though...)
TRIVIA:
Who was told by King Solomon not to pass the brook Kidron? What was
his punishment for disobeying?
Here is a quote from birthday-boy Edward M. Kennedy -- "Frankly, I don't
mind not being president.
I
just mind that someone else is." OK, on to the real stuff!
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Thanks
to MAv for this one (NOTE: For my friends in Texas...)
You
Know You're from Texas when:
You
only know five spices: salt, pepper, Ranch dressing, BBQ Sauce and ketchup.
You
design your Halloween costume to fit over Wrangler Jeans and Cowboy Boots.
The
mosquitoes have landing lights.
You
have more miles on your tractor than your car.
You
have 10 favorite recipes for Deer meat.
You've
taken your kids trick-or-treating when it was 90 degrees outside.
Driving
is better after it's rained because the potholes are filled with mud and
you don't have to take those backroads to go "mudding."
You
owe more money on your bulldozer than your car.
The
local paper covers national and international headlines on .25 percent
of the page, but requires 6 pages for local sports.
You
can write a check at Dairy Queen for 2 Hunger-Busters and fries.
At least
twice a year, the kitchen doubles as a meat processing plant.
The
most effective mosquito repellent is a shotgun.
Your
leaf-blower gets stuck on the roof.
You
think the start of Deer season is a national holiday.
You
frequently clean grease off your barbecue pit, so the coyotes won't prowl
on your deck.
You
know which leaves make good toilet paper.
The
major county fund-raiser isn't bingo - it's sausage making.
You
find 70 degrees Fahrenheit a little chilly.
The
trunk of your car doubles as a sauna.
You
attend a formal event in your best clothes, your finest jewelry, and your
Cowboy Boots.
You
know 4 seasons - Almost Summer, Summer, Still Summer, and Deer Season.
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From
a friend: Best first-date conversations...
* I
really don't like this restaurant that much, but I wanted to use this 2-for-1
coupon before it expired.
* I
refuse to get cable. That's how they keep tabs on you.
* I
used to come here all the time with my ex.
* I
never said you NEED a nose job. I just said it wouldn't hurt to consider
it.
* Could
you excuse me? My cat gets lonely if he doesn't hear my voice on the answering
machine every hour.
* I
really feel that I've grown in the past few years. Used to be I wouldn't
have given someone like you a second look.
* I
know you said you don't eat anything with a face. But a good butcher will
cut that part off for you if you ask.
* It's
been tough, but I've come to accept that most people I date just won't
be as smart as I am.
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From
a friend: Things to ponder in 2001
Living
on Earth is expensive, but it does include a free trip around the sun.
Birthdays
are good for you: the more you have the longer you live.
How
long a minute is depends on what side of the bathroom door you're on.
I have
noticed that the people who are late are often so much jollier than the
people who have to wait for them.
If ignorance
is bliss, why aren't more people happy?
Most
of us go to our grave with our music still inside of us.
If Wal-Mart
is lowering prices every day, how come nothing in the store is free yet?
You
may be only one person in the world, but you may also be the world to one
person.
Some
mistakes are too much fun to only make once.
Don't
cry because its over; smile because it happened.
We could
learn a lot from crayons: some are sharp, some are pretty, some are dull,
some have weird names, and all are different colors ...but they all have
to learn to live in the same box.
Everything
should be made as simple as possible, but no simpler.
A truly
happy person is one who can enjoy the scenery on a detour.
Happiness
comes through doors you didn't even know you left open.
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From
a friend: Oats
"Oats"
While
driving in Pennsylvania, a family caught up to an Amish carriage.
The owner of the carriage obviously had a sense of humor, because attached
to the back of the carriage was a hand printed sign... "Energy efficient
vehicle. Runs on oats and grass. Caution: Do not step on exhaust."
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Thanks
again to AB:
A fifth
grade teacher in a Christian school asked her class to look at TV commercials
and see if they could use them in some way to communicate ideas about God.
Here are some of the results:
God
is like BAYER ASPIRIN ... He works miracles.
God
is like a FORD ... He's got a better idea.
God
is like COKE ... He's the real thing.
God
is like HALLMARK CARDS ... He cares enough to send His very best.
God
is like TIDE ... He gets the stains out that others leave behind.
God
is like GENERAL ELECTRIC ... He brings good things to life.
God
is like SEARS ... He has everything.
God
is like ALKA-SELTZER ... Try Him, you'll like Him.
God
is like SCOTCH TAPE ... You can't see him, but you know He's there.
God
is like DELTA ... He's ready when you are.
God
is like ALLSTATE ... You're in good hands with Him.
God
is like VO-5 HAIR SPRAY ... He holds up through all kinds of weather.
God
is like DIAL SOAP ... Aren't you glad you have Him. Don't you wish
everybody did?
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Thanks
to JLLH for this one: FEAR OF QUESTIONS
In
a terrible accident at a railroad crossing, a train smashed into a car
and pushed it nearly four hundred yards down the track. Though no one was
killed, the driver took the train company to court.
At
the trial, the engineer insisted that he had given the driver ample warning
by waving his lantern back and forth for nearly a minute. He even
stood and convincingly demonstrated how he'd done it. The court believed
his story, and the suit was dismissed. "Congratulations," the lawyer
said to the engineer when it was over. "You did superbly under cross-examination."
"Thanks,"
he said, "but he sure had me worried."
"How's
that?" the lawyer asked.
"I
was afraid he was going to ask if the lantern was lit!"
In
a similar way, we often go through our lives afraid that someone will ask
us a particular question. "If someone asks me why I believe in God
and not evolution, what will I say?" "What if someone asks me how
I can possibly believe in the resurrection?" "What do I say if someone
asks me why I believe the Bible truly is the Word of God, or why I believe
that it teaches this or that?" Instead of being detrimental as in
the case of the engineer above, though, such questions provide us
with an opportunity to share our faith. "But sanctify the Lord God in your
hearts, and always be ready to give a defense to everyone who asks you
a reason for the hope that is in you, with meekness and fear." (I Peter
3:15).
Don't
be afraid for anyone to ask!
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ANSWER:
Shimei was told not to pass Kidron, and his punishment was death -- a punishment
inflicted at the order of the king by Jehoida. I Kings 2:36-46.
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