Dressed in red
All fat and hairy
And you wonder why
Kids find him scary
A fat old freak
Who drinks too much
Who stinks like farts
And gropes his crotch
He sits and waits
Deep in his lair
He never bothers
With underwear
He�s contemplating
Girls and boys
He knows they�re queuing
To ask for toys
He calls them in
One at a time
He waits a year
To commit his crime
He sits them down
Upon his knee
A gift for them
A grope for he
Parents with cameras
His eyes like berries
Children in terror
He grabs their cherries
ho ho he bellows
To muffle the scream
This makes nightmares
It doesn�t make dreams