The heavy rain embraced my sympathy for a while as i waited for a bus which never seemed to come.36 minutes had passed and nothing bigger than a jeep turned the street's curve. I was getting tired and the black clouds swung my mood. Atleast i had something to sit on- a short but long brick wall covered in grafitti- which was still a bit wet from last hour's rain.
So i began to worry... I was always the type to get carried away when i was left alone and waiting, waiting for something i wasn't sure of. Overdosed imagination was a problem which brought about paranoia; Ghosts and revengeful spirits, and in this case, the loss of the boy closest to my affections. What if he had got hit by a car... it was his style to cross streets at the stupidest times. What if the bus had an accident... Then thoughts ran through my head and my brain started functioning harder; Making another world with sad endings... and going to the point where i would psychologically put myself in there! And i got lost in those thoughts. I felt as though i could cry. Was it because i was feeling the loss of him, or was it just my chemical imbalancements again? It didn't really matter. Or did it? I missed the feeling- The heart burning, aching feeling that could and would tear apart someone's sanity- That feeling i once used to experience so much more... and now i missed it. I was too used to it.
A car went screeching past me and made me jump. Such a coincidence for my worrying thoughts. The cars were getting on my nerves. The big roars, the sudden screeches, the speed and toxication... it was driving me crazy! It felt as if they were war. Yes, as if they were war.
I looked once again at the street's curve and saw nothing. I jumped off the small brick wall and frustratidly walked back home. The leaves on the ground looked so innocent; Raped by violent winds and crushed to the floor by busy feet. It started raining again and i unlocked my front door and walked in, silently and dreadfully. It started raining harder now. No one was in the house. A perfect setting for the deep and down mood.
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