If you are like me , you are intirgued by the situations and circumstances that we encounter in life. Prehaps the greatest topic of intrest to me is relationships and love. Now there are many type of relationships and where the human heart is concerned there is no definite aproach to love. However the situations we encounter, the circustances we face in relationships is unique to any one but rather they are quite common. Think about it, how many people have the problems that you faced, how many have found the joy and happiness in a relationship that you have. I am sure that if you look carefully , you will discover that you are not alone in any one extreme or the other.
But what makes a relationship work, what makes it memorable? Well to answer that question, you must look inside yourself and decide what you want, how serious do you want your relationship to be. How much are willing to sacrafice. Inorder to have a loving relationship, there will be some sacrafices made by both parties. In the end it will all be worth it.
Three of the most important materials when building a relationship are honesty, trust and forgiveness.
An open and honest relationship is what so many of us desire, but somewhere along the way, we fall short. Espically when it comes to saying how we really feel about something our loved one did or did not do. Hiding your feelings, keeping them to yourself and not expressing yourself will only cause you to feel resentment toward your loved one. If you never express your desires, you likes and dislikes, how will someone know how to make you happy. Sure we would all like it if our mates could be psychic every now and again and read our thoughts, but they are just human, they cannot. Along with being honest comes having discretion and being understanding.
Have the discretion to know when is a good time to talk and also know that just blurting out your feelings without any thought of how you express what is on your mind can be extremly damaging to a relationship. It is not often what you say but how you say it. Express yourself with thought to the other persons feelings. Let them know without shouting at them, or being to over bearing.
Prehaps one of the greatest mysteries to us men is that no matter what we do, women want to know. I myself have been guilty of this with my queen, I thought I was doing good and protecting her from hurt, I was not guilty as such of anything, but I was guilty of underestimating how understanding a woman could be. Guy's if a woman is trying to check you out or is trying to take you away from the one that you love, let her know. Hiding your actions towards this woman looks incrimnating and if you your lady love finds out some other way it could mean trouble for you. Women I give the seem advice to you, be honest with your man. If a man is constantly coming on to you let your loved one know because it can cause quite a bit of confusion if they both are in the same place at the same time. If both partners are open and honest, it will keep suprises and a potentially relationship ending situation from arising.
Another important ingredient in a good relationship is trust. I know that in a world where so many of us have been hurt, where we so constantly hear of the games that people play on each otheer, it is difficult to trust anyone. But if you want a happy relationship, you are going to have to learn to trust someone. Men, many times we are the guilty party in a relationship, women know this and so it is going to be difficult for you to gain her trust. At times you feel like giving up when trying to win a womans trust, it may seem like all that you is in vain. I know, I have been and I am still where so many of you are. It hurts to know that no matter what you do it seems that your trust is always questioned I have have come to realize that trust is not what you do and how often you do it, it is how long you can do it for. Gaining a woman's trust takes time.It get's fustrating at times but it will be worth it. Some ponters for helping you to gain her trust: 1)Be open and honest 2) Always stand by what you say. 3)Always keep your word, if you say you will do something do it. 4)Do not make any promises, let your word be your bond. Women just be open and be honest and never hide where you were or lie about where you are going from us. For women and men, never act shady around your partner, introduce each other to your friends, don't leave the room when you are the phone, don't talk as if you are trying to hide what the other person is saying on the phone, you have to be yourself and talk normal. And for those internet chatters out there like me, don't quickly close out your dialog box everytime your loved one walks by, appears very suspicious.
To ere is human, to forgive is devine. This is the one area that takes much trust, much honesty. From time to time in a relationship feeling will be hurt and things will be said that we do not like, that will hurt us. If you want your relationship to last, you must forgive each other. Forgiveness is not always easy, but it can save a relationship. Everyone deserves a second chance, don't be t hasty to call things quit. Many times times after you have forgiven someone the relationship is much better than before.It is almost like a muscle, after being torn it regrows stronger than ever. Like this your love can brcome so much stronger, after being tested. However you have to know when you have forgiven someone enough times, you have to know when it is time to call it quits. If the person refuses to try to change and continuously cheat, lie, etc , then it is up to you what to do.
The greatest advice I can give to you is to put God first in your life and your relationship. Represent his love in the way you love each other and treat each other the way you feel that Christ would have you to show your love. Let people know you for your love of god and for your love of a loved one. Let them them see peace and unity when they you and your loved one. be the type of person you want your loved one to be. I know that hard times will come but as long as you have the Love of Christ holding you together, as long as you stand upon his word, you can and will have a sucessful relationship. Always remember, no matter how much you love your mate, love God more and show your love to him and your mate and you will have a better life. |
