I walk into my apartment with the mail which included the lastest issue of People magazine. I flop down and open it up to the page of the article with the Backstreet Boys. Each member had their own section of the interview and I scanned until I saw Nick's name in bold:
He's the youngest, the cutest, the most popular, he's Nick Carter and he shifts around on the seat in the back of the limo like a restless child and looks over at me hopefully,
"Can we go to like the park or something? I've been trapped inside all day." I nod and his bodyguard orders the limo to pull over. We make our way across the street and begin to walk through Central Park, I can see him take in deep breaths,
"This can't compare to the smell of the Florida Keys." He looks over and smiles slightly. It was apparent the smile was simply on his face it wasn't in his heart,
"It's like fish and salt in the Keys. You can smell things that don't smell you know? Like feelings. It's calm and peaceful and relaxed, it's in the air, thats what I feel when I'm there, I feel like me." He spots a group of girls and instantly steps to the other side of me and makes an unexpected right turn as he looks behind him for security. His bodyguard gives him a comforting look and he seems to relax,
"So what does New York City smell like?" He frowns slightly,
"Pain, anger, bad stuff." He looks over at me and laughs,
"And pee." He points at a bum in the bushes relieving himself. His hair blows in the wind and I see the little kid, well at least at this moment. He may not get the attention his youthful counterpart of NSYNC, Justin Timberlake, gets but his good looks are something different. He's more adorable than sexy, more beautiful than handsome. All that goes out the window and he turns into the heartthrob when a couple of young ladies, a bit older than the expected twelve year old Backstreet fans, come over and ask to get a picture with him. His hand, down by his side, signals to his ever present protector that it's ok. The awe-stricken and flirtatious fans weren't even aware the quick non-verbal conversation took place and they were saved from being turned away by Nick himself. He gives them looks to die for and works them like a pupeteer as he listens to them talk about the last time they saw him. The conversation lasts about a minute before he puts on a pained look and apologizes for having to leave so he could finish our interview. We all know he can sing but he's one hell of an actor too. Once they leave, his sunny disposition disappears immediately,
"What's it like being single and having young women come up to you all the time? You don't have to worry about going up to a girl, they come up to you." He shrugs, something he does a lot,
"People think it's easier, it's not. I'm just like everyone else, I get turned down, I get screwed over." The bitterness in his voice is obvious and I see what I can get out of him,
"When was the last time you had a bad experience with a woman?" He laughs, but it wasn't a joy-filled laughter, it was one that seemed to say you wouldn't believe me if I told you,
"Actually today." I figured I would have to pry for more but he was willing to talk and I decided to play the role of therapist and listen,
"Someone I really cared about, I mean I still do but it didn't work out. She wasn't upfront about some stuff. She was the kind of girl that you would be in a relationship with and I think I wanted that, with her. She knows how mad I got but she probably doesn't know how much she hurt me." He looks over at me,
"I'm not whining, I mean this happens to everyone. You know, but whatever." Everyday celebrities talk about how they can't trust anyone and I roll my eyes at it all the time but as I think about what I'm about to ask him I realize they don't tell us all the time, we ask all the time,
"Do you think she was caught up in who you are?" His answer was automatic,
"No, absolutely not. She's not like that, she just made a mistake you know." He defends her character without hesitation and it makes me curious,
"You seem to really care. Is there a possibility you will give her another chance?" It's a long time before he answers,
"I learned a lot from her, about people and girls and I'm a better person because of her. If I go back, I wouldn't have learned as much as I thought I did. You have to keeping moving forward, you can't go backwards. But I'm sure I'll be a better boyfriend to someone out there because of her." He seemed to have thought about that for a long time, as if he thought more about how his mystery girl would come off than himself. Maybe this one time he should think about taking a step backwards, with the way he seems to think of her it might be the path to taking two steps forward.
A tear drops from my chin and splatters on the page. That must have been the interview he had to do after our argument, which was the last time we talked. That was three weeks ago and it was still tough. I decided not to call him, it was my fault we fell out, the least I could do was repsect his wishes to end the line of communication. Obviously, that's what he wanted, or thought was best because he hasn't called. I cheated on John, who broke up with me instantly, and I hurt Nick. I went from no guy to two guys back to being alone again. Funny, all those times I talked about how I would be good for Nick and I would treat him right and be different from all those other girls and I hurt him. Hurt him enough for him to do what he's never done before, talk about it in a magazine. If they knew it was me he was talking about, I'm sure my name will get some votes, the fans would make sure I was the subject of another anti campaign. I smile and shake my head, yep, me and Mandy, two of a kind.
~THE END~
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