Tired can't even begin to express what I'm feeling right now but what I will feel when I'm with Juliana is even better and worth the sleep deprivation. She followed behind and kicked her shoes off immediately,
"Nice room Brehan." The thing is I don't much pay attention to my room unless something is wrong with it. I've been living in hotel rooms since I was fourteen years old so they are par for the course for me. Come to think of it, Juliana has been in more than her share so the fact that the curtains match the bed and whatever has caught her eye seems strange to me.
"So, how is everything going now that your schedule is more hectic than ever?" I've worked hard in this modeling thing for a long time but it just blows my mind that it's even more than before. I knew I wasn't going to be able to sit on my ass, that maintaining success is even harder than gaining it but I underestimated the workload. I'm at a point where everyone wants me and I can't say no to anyone. Not right now, while I'm just beginning to get the supermodel exposure.
"I can't say that it's not exhausting but it's what I wanted." She nodded,
"I'm glad you have it in perspective. The worse thing someone in the industry can do is act like they didn't bring it all on themselves. You ask for the fame and along with it come all the other things. It's a package deal. You don't have to like it but you do have to accept it." She was the media and I shouldn't be surprised she thinks like that. I hate that dotted line shit that everyone uses to justify invading people's privacy and shifting the blame off of themselves for wanting to know more than they should and doing immoral things to get that information. It is the biggest cop out, blame the person who is being victimized for doing something they love as the reason people go through their garbage and exploit them to make money. She stood before me and helped me remove my shirt,
"What's on your mind?" Once the shirt was from over my face it revealed a frown,
"Huh?" She smiled ever so slightly,
"You look like you're thinking about something. Something wrong?"
"Nothing, I'm fine." She grabbed my face gently and kissed me slowly. I couldn't help but moan as her tongue slipped inside my mouth and all I felt was how warm it was as it explored my mouth. My eyes remained closed as she pulled back, her hands still on either side of my head. After a few seconds of silence and no movement I opened my eyes to see her staring at me.
"What?" She had a look on her face that I couldn't figure out,
"What is it?" She seemed a little devious and the first thing that enters my mind is that she has a little fun in store for me once we make it over to that bed.
"How is Steven treating you?" There was a slap in the face that brought me back to reality. Juliana and I just don't see eye to eye when it comes to Steven and I feel she has a total lack of respect for my feelings and me when she mentions his name. She isn't going to say anything positive and she knows it will upset me.
"Everything is fine just so you know." She shook her head at me and instantly made me feel like a child. She and Steven are the only ones coincidentally enough that share that ability.
"You consider having his wife file a lawsuit and a restraining order against you fine?" That hit like a ton of bricks. My first thought is how did she know but I shouldn't be surprised; she is an editor for a magazine. It's their business to know everyone else's business then make sure everyone in the world knows it too.
"Fuck off." I turned away from her and walked off only to have her grab my arm and pull me back,
"You wouldn't have to deal with this if it weren't for him." It wasn't Steven's fault it was Evelyn's fault. If she hadn't barged into my home none of this would be happening,
"You look for anything you can to blame Steven. This is all because of Evelyn." She gave up on trying to hold me in place and removed her hand from my arm,
"It isn't just Steven's fault but it's not Evelyn. It's you, you're the other person who is at fault." It's not my fault; I was the one who was disrespected in my own home.
"You don't even know what happened." She nodded,
"Yeah, I don't know the entire story. Why don't you tell me?" She sat down on a chair next to the table and propped her feet up. She was so full of herself right now I wish I could just shut her up.
"She came to my place screaming at Steven about not getting enough money then she attacked me. I was defending myself." She shook her head and looked at me as if I were the dumbest person in the world and what I had just said was ridiculous,
"Maybe if you and Steven hadn't made her look stupid by going behind her back and breaking up her family she wouldn't be so angry." She is supposed to be my friend; she is supposed to support me,
"What the hell are you talking about? She was the one who messed it up not me." How dare she? Like her life was an example for the pure and moral. I ran my hands through my hair and shook my head,
"No Juliana. Look, Steven and I are just living our lives. She needs to get over it. It's not like she knew we were together before they separated." She laughed at me and once again made me feel stupid,
"You honestly think she didn't know Brehan? I'm sure she knows about the others too." I don't know who came before me but right now there is just me, I'm the only one Steven loves and she attacked me and is going to have my name in the middle of some gossip bullshit.
"You don't like Steven so it's not like you're going to try to understand." She stood up and walked towards me,
"You're right, I don't like Steven. And I never will because he doesn't have your best interest at heart." I laughed at her,
"Of course he has my best interest at heart, he's my manager." She held my face in her hands and whispered,
"Not professionally, personally. He is all about himself he doesn't care about you. You have never had a real relationship in your life. You're twenty years old. Don't you want to experience that? Steven isn't going to give you that." How could she even think those things let alone say them to me?
"Like you've ever tried to give me that. All you have ever been about is having sex with me so I hardly think you are the one to judge Steven. Honestly, you just described yourself." Anger was all I felt and red was all I saw.
"But you didn't say I was wrong about Steven."
"I didn't think I needed to. Of course you're wrong. He loves me and I don't know why it's so hard for everyone to see that." She nodded
"Everyone? So I'm not the only one. Shouldn't that tell you something?" She completely disregarded what I said about her. I pulled from her grasp and stared at her,
"And you didn't say what I said about you was wrong. When have you ever thought about me being in a healthy, as you put it, relationship? If you were concerned about that you wouldn't be fucking me while I'm in a relationship now." I thought I might have had her on the ropes but this was Juliana we're talking about here,
"If you were in a real relationship I would completely respect that. I'm not just out to have sex with you Brehan. I care about you. You know that. I've loved you more than Steven ever has." She leaned in to kiss me as her hands ran down and settled on my breasts.
"Are you crazy?" I threw her hands off me and put some distance between us,
"Here I am arguing with you, you've totally pissed me off and bad-mouthed the man that I love and I'm going to marry. Are you out of your mind? I'm not some man that is distracted by sex." She looked at me and I could tell she was surprised by my outburst, usually sex does make everything ok. Steven did it to me all the time.
Chapter 80
Stranger Than Fiction
Stories
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