We made our way through the airport and I was ready to be home soaking in a hot bath. Pam travelled back to New York with me and was tagging along side me,
"Ok, do you want to stop somewhere before you get home?" I grunted,
"Are you serious?" Where there hell would I want to go after an eight hour flight. Not to mention the fact when I woke up it was seven o'clock in the morning and now, after that eight hour flight, it was only eleven o'clock. I still had a whole day to survive, there was no way. I planned on crashing right after my bath. I hated transcontinental flights and I always had to make them in order to work, go figure. Once we made it outside I was happy to see a towncar waiting,
"Ms. Locke." I nodded and sat down in the back of the car, followed by Pam, as the driver loaded our bags. I took my small travel pillow from her and lay it on the window and relaxed,
"Wake me when we get there."
I dropped my purse on the floor and collapsed on the couch as Pam began to put my things away,
"Hit the button on the answering machine." I called out as I kicked my shoes off. I heard the usual from friends, agents, lawyers and then a youthful cheerful voice filled my apartment. My eyes opened as I listened to Nick's message,
"Hey Brehan, it's Nick. I know you're in Paris but I thought I'd just call and leave you a little message. Hope your trip was ok and get some rest I'm sure you're tired. Gimme a call whenever. Talk to you later." He even left his home address so I could send his little sister that picture. I looked over to see Pam smiling at me,
"Why are you smiling at me like that?" She shrugged,
"No reason." Suddenly Steven's voice filled the air and my smile disappeared,
"Brehan, make sure you get to my office in a couple of days, there is some paperwork you need to take care of. I'll be in town the day after tomorrow." I sighed, what an asshole, why couldn't he just have them couriered over like he usually does. Now he's treating me like I'm just anyone. I rolled my eyes and sighed,
"Pam, I need a latte." She nodded,
"Do you want anything to eat?" I nodded my head,
Yeah, get me get a soy burger." She nodded and left for the small cafe abot three blocks that I loved. I went in the bathroom and started my bath as I stripped out of my clothes, I felt so dirty from that long trip. My phone rang and I walked through my apartment naked to answer the phone,
"Hello?" I can't believe this. Why didn't I check to see who it was,
"Yes, may I help you?"
"Brehan honey, it' mom." I know exactly who it is. Which is all the more reason why I wish I would have screened the damn call.
"I know who it is." For years the only contact I had with my family was every eight or so months when they would try to talk to me and I would turn them away. Lately, they've been calling more and more, it's mainly been her,
"How have you been?" What is this? Why is she doing this? Making such an effort,
"I've fine. I have to go now-" I could hear her sigh loudly into the phone,
"Brehan Elaine, I've had it with you, we're family. Why do you avoid us and hate us so much? All we've ever done was be there for you and love you." I shook my head, I didn't want to hear this shit,
"When no one else would right? That's what you want to say. Well, I didn't ask you to take care of me. It's not like you gave a damn about me. It was all about looking good. 'Oh look at us taking in this poor orphaned baby.' The only reason you took me was because you thought you couldn't have kids but as soon as you had Amanda you totaly forgot about me. Well except when the checks came in from my modeling. Just leave me alone." Can this conversation please be over now? I don't know why I don't just hang up,
"Why are you being like this?" I snorted,
"You made me like this. You know, kids are a reflection upon their parents. That's what they say. Well, I guess you did a horrible job. I'm not talking anymore. Don't call me anymore." I hung up and turned the ringer off. I picked up a vase and threw it across the room and it shattered into pieces leaving water and flowers on the floor. Why can't they just leave me alone? Why can't they just let me forget where I came from?
Brehan was over at her friend Mallory's house spending the night. Mallry looked over at Brehan,
"What does it feel like to be a crackbaby?" Brehan frowned,
"What?" She had no idea what her friend was talking about,
"Your real mom was on crack. They took you away from her and Mr and Mrs Locke took you in." Brehan shook her head,
"That's not true. They are my real mom and dad." Mallory shook her head as she continued to look through a fashion magazine,
"No they aren't. You're adopted. Your mom and my mom were talking about it this afternoon when your mom was over here." Brehan felt the tears sting her eyes,
"You don't know what you're talking about. You're lying." Mallory just shrugged,
"You don't have to believe me if you don't want but it's true. They were talking about whether or not to tell you or if you even needed to know. When you go home tomorrow that's when your mom is going to tell you. Your dad doesn't think you should be told yet. He thinks they should wait until much later." Brehan shook her head as she ran out of Mallory' room and into the bathroom locking herself in and crying hysterically.
I wouldn't even come out of that bathroom until my father came over and finally took the door off the hinges. After that it was all down hill with my family. No matter how many times and how many ways they tried to explain I just couldn't get over being lied to and more than anything embarrassed about who I really was. I shook my head at the mess I made on the floor, Pam could take care of that when she got back. I walked over and picked up the phone to call the flower shop and deliver more flowers, all mine were almost dead and there was something about a house full of flowers that made me feel good. I went back to the bathroom to see the bathtub almost filled with bubbles. I turned off the water and stepped in, it was so hot I had to slowly get adjusted. For me, the hotter the water the better. I slid down and closed my eyes, I was already exhausted from the trip and now she had to go and call me, making it worse. And top of all that there was Steven, when it rains it pours. The only thing that hasn't set me off since I stepped off the plane was Nick's phone call. A month ago I was ripping him at a photoshoot, now we're playing phone tag, it's a weird world we live in. I need something to take my mind off all this, I stepped out of the bathtub and into my bedroom. I took out my bag of pot and a lighter and mde my way back to the bathroom. As I lit up I lay back and let my body float, I'm not going anywhere for a long time. The phone rang, do people fucking track me? It's like they know I'm back. I listened as the answering machine took their message,
"Hi Brehan, it's Julianna. I'm going to be in town tonight. I'll be staying at the Waldorf. Give me a call, I haven't seen you in so long." Julianna was a former model, now she was a fashion editor for a fashion magazine. We probably see each other every few months so we felt compelled to make the most of the time that we were able to spend together. It's always crazy when she's around, she was wilder than me and I think that's saying alot. It's a good thing it's early in the afternoon, I am going to have to rest up for her.
Chapter 35
Stranger Than Fiction
Stories
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