Shayna fell asleep on the couch and woke up to see the blue screen on the TV watching her. She picked herself up off the couch and went upstairs to brush her teeth. As she looked in the mirror washing her face she thought back to the phone call last night, more like this morning. As mad as she was about being called, she still couldn�t help but wonder if he was ok and what had set him off. His temper was never something he was good at controlling. There were times when he was mad that he could be a real asshole. He said things in the heat of the moment that in her heart she knew he didn�t mean, but they still cut like a knife. Then he would cry and say how sorry he was then would make love, well actually he fucked her until she forgave him. Damn, she thought, no wonder he never communicated, she never made him. She just held him when he cried; they never talked about what the problem was then they had sex. She began to realize she never held him accountable and maybe he was right. Maybe she did hold him responsible for her happiness. The only time she hung out with her friends was when he was on the road. Other than that, she had no time for anyone or anything else. She always said she wanted to go back to school but that never happened once Nick came into her life. She didn�t have time for that. Doesn�t matter, she thought, this is not my fault, he had hurt her for the last time. She stood there in the mirror and thought back to one night about three months after she had moved in with him.
It was two-thirty when he walked in the house. Her company�s president and his wife were in town and there was a dinner to discuss the plans for the company�s future. She couldn�t get out of it; it wouldn�t be cool she told him. He pouted about it but got over it and said he�d hang out at home. When she got home he wasn�t there and there was no message or anything. She tried to call him on his cell phone but it was off. She was a little worried and sat up waiting. He walked through the door, looked at her and stripped his clothes off in the closet. She walked over to him and put her arms around him,
�Hey baby.� He shrugged from her grasp and she frowned; she could smell the alcohol and see the glazed over look in his eyes. He didn�t look trashed but he was definitely feeling good.
�I was worried about you.� He turned in her direction and gave her a cold look before he walked out of the closet. She could see lipstick on his neck and followed him out,
�There�s lipstick on your neck. You could have least wiped it off before you walked through the door.� He turned and began to yell at her,
�This is my house don�t tell me what I should have done before I walked into MY house.� She shook her head,
�Are you still pissed because I had to cancel tonight?�
�We had plans and you know if I backed out on you at the last minute you would bitch about it.� She sighed,
�Nick, they just told us about this dinner three days ago and I told you two days ago, it was important.� He snorted,
�Important, you ate fucking dinner.� She shook her head,
�It was more than that, it wasn�t about the dinner it was the president of my company. If the president of your record company wanted to have dinner with all the Backstreet Boys you would not show up?�
�Whatever Shayna, fuck it.� She pulled his arm as he tried to walk away,
�So who was she; some random girl at the bar? Did you sleep with her?� He pulled away from her and took her arm in his hand and screamed in her face,
�And if I did? Can you blame me? All you do is lay there; you have got to be the worst lay I have ever had. All the other girls try to fuck my brains out and impress me; but not you; not my girlfriend.� She stood there stunned as he walked out of the room. She figured he slept in one of the guest rooms.
She woke up when she felt him shaking her,
�Baby, wake up.� She moaned,
�What time is it?� He looked over at the alarm clock,
�Its seven. Look baby, I�m sorry for all that stuff I said. I didn�t mean it.� She opened her eyes, which were puffy from all the crying, and remembered what he was talking about. She didn�t say anything she just kept looking at him,
�I�m sorry, I didn�t mean what I said, I was just drunk and mad because you didn�t stay with me. I didn�t sleep with her. I didn�t sleep with anyone. I-� his voice began to shake and he lay his head on her chest. She looked up at the ceiling at first, not wanting to forgive him, until she heard him sniffle. She raised his head and she saw the tears,
�I didn�t mean it. I promise. Don�t leave me, I love you.� He began to kiss her and in between his kisses he kept saying how sorry he was, how he would never to do it again and they made love all morning.
She shook her head at herself in the mirror; she fell for it every time. He hurt her and she was the one holding and consoling HIM afterwards. She went downstairs to cook herself some breakfast before she would go out and have a day of fun for herself.
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Chapter 8