Shayna and Bill were sitting around his house with a couple of her friends. She made spaghetti and they were hanging out having an early dinner before the girls went shopping that night when Nick and the rest of the guys appeared on the TV. Her stomach dropped at the sight of him; he looked so good and she could feel her body respond instantly. They were talking about making their new album when Carrie turned to Shayna,
�I didn�t know they started recording again. Has Nick let you hear any of the new stuff?� Shayna locked eyes with Natasha, she felt like a deer in headlights; Natasha was the only that knew she had never told Bill who her ex-boyfriend was. He looked over at Shayna,
�Nick? Who�s Nick?� She was about to say something but Carrie was on a roll,
�The blonde, that�s the dreaded ex.� Carrie and Marla laughed as they sat on the floor unaware a secret has just been told. She looked over at Bill who was looking at her; she couldn�t read his expression and she quickly looked down at her hands in her lap. She avoided his eye contact as the night went on.
The girls were walking out the door when Bill called out,
�Shayna�let me talk to you for a moment before you leave.� She turned to the girls,
�I�ll meet you guys in the car.� They waved by to Bill and she walked back over to him,
�Yeah?� She knew what he wanted to talk about as she stuck her hands in the back pocket of her jeans. He ran his hand over his face,
�Why didn�t you tell me?� She shook her head,
�Tell you what?� He rolled his eyes,
�Don�t�you know what I�m talking about. You dated a Backstreet Boy?� She shrugged,
�I didn�t think it was a big deal. You haven�t given me the run down of your dating history.� He leaned against the wall,
�It�s not the same.�
�Why not?� He walked over to her and looked her in her eyes,
�If it�s the same then why were you so nervous after I found out?� She frowned and shrugged her shoulders,
�This is probably why? I didn�t want all the questions. What�s the big deal anyway? Look, they�re waiting for me.� She walked out and didn�t look back. She knew it was different, in some way she didn�t know how, but it just was. That�s why she didn�t tell him.
She dropped Carrie and Marla off at their apartment and they were sitting in the car; when Natasha reached for the door Shayna blurted out,
�I started sleeping with Nick again.� Natasha looked over wide-eyed,
�What? When? Since you�ve been with Bill?� She nodded her head and fought the tears,
�Yeah, a couple of weeks ago he came over one night and he said all these things to me Nat�and when he touched me�it just all came back. Then the next morning I skipped work and we slept together again�Bill came over while Nick was there.� She placed her hand on Shayna�s shoulder,
�What did Bill do?� Shayna shook her head,
�Nick hid in the bedroom�he wanted to stay and take care of me Nat and I lied to him and got rid of him because of Nick.� She began to cry and lay her head on the steering wheel. She looked over to see Natasha waiting patiently,
�What was I thinking?� She could Natasha was about to say something she didn�t want to hear, she could see it in her eyes, the expression on her face,
�Shay, leave Nick alone, ok? Its nothing but bad news; it never works out when you sneak around.� Shayna wiped the tears from her face,
�You said Bill doesn�t do for me what Nick does.� Natasha smiled,
�That wasn�t permission to go out and cheat Shayna and you know it. Choose, one or the other.� Shayna laid her head back on the seat and cried,
�Bill is really good for me.�
�And Nick?� She sighed,
�He�s a sweetheart; you know that Nat. He�s sensitive, he makes me laugh, he�s so carefree and even though he�s lived the life of an adult since he was a kid�he�s pretty na�ve and almost innocent in some ways.� Natasha nodded her head,
�And the sex is amazing.� Shayna shrugged,
�What�s wrong with that?� Natasha shook her head,
�Nothing and obviously the sex with Bill doesn�t compare or you wouldn�t risk your almost perfect relationship for Nick.� Shayna looked over at her,
�My relationship with Nick wasn�t that bad.� Natasha shrugged,
�If you say so, look, this is about sex for him. If he wanted you back he would have taken the opportunity when you wanted him back�but he didn�t he walked out the door and he didn�t even look back�now he gets all the perks of being in a relationship with you but he doesn�t have to put in any of the work�and the cherry on top is he gets to sleep with other girls and not have to hide it.� She never thought about Nick and other girls, she looked down and the tears rolled down her face,
�Don�t tell me you think Nick isn�t sleeping with other girls? I mean, you�re dating and you think he�s just going to sit around by the phone waiting for your call? He�s using you sweetie. You used to say what Nick wants Nick gets why are you letting him do you like this? Shayna struggled to catch her breath and stop the tears and Natasha reached over and pulled her into her arms as she brushed her hair,
�It�s ok.� She pulled herself from Natasha�s grasp and smiled weakly,
�He didn�t make me do anything Nat, I could have said no but I didn�t want to, its just as much me getting from him as him getting from me.� Natasha opened the door and placed her foot on the ground,
�Really think about that Shay; when have you ever had control in your relationship with Nick?� Shayna watched her go inside her apartment and they waved before she closed the door,
�We both wanted it.� Didn�t they?
Home
Full Circle
Chapter 36