QUALITIES OF A GREAT PARTNER
1. A HAPPY DISPOSITION- look for a happy, optimistic person.
Find someone who has a sense of humor and can laugh at
himself/herself..True happiness springs from a
content heart. Beware of the person who is only
happy when you are around. You're going to
get tired of being responsible for another person's
happiness. You could end up feeling guilty when the
person slips into bouts of depression...
True happiness is...a part of a person's character,
regardless of the circumstances...
2. THOUGHTFULNESS - How does your date treat his parents and
yours? Chances are you'll get treated very much the same
way. Does he see things that need to be done and offer to
help? Or does he put his own needs first? Does he open the car
door and wait to seat you at the table? Manners are important-
and they seldom get better after marriage.
3. NOT EASILY ANGERED - ... Temper outbursts... can be the
symptom of internal hostility. This hostility is often
repressed during courtship as a person is trying hard to be
on his best behavior... Take seriously any outburst you
observe, and check with others who have known this person in
different situations to see if they have noticed this trait...
The way a woman treats her younger brother may be an indication
of how she will treat her husband... Be leery of the person who
has not learned to express his anger in words and instead merely
harbors angry feelings in his heart. Going silent and withdrawing
from a loved one because of anger is unhealthy and damaging to a
relationship... Be sure you date a person long enough to observe
how easily he or she becomes angry and how these feelings are
expressed. Ask yourself, "Is this what I want to live with for
a lifetime?"
4. WILLING TO SOLVE PROBLEMS - It's almost impossible to solve
relationship problems by yourself. Marry someone who will be
honest enough to admit being wrong, who doesn't have a habit of
blaming others...
5. PURITY - Purity is not just an old-fashioned virtue... it's
just safer to date someone who hasn't played around... At the
same time you should not hold it against a person for past
sexual involvement. You cannot always judge a person's true
purity by virginity alone... Mind purity is equally important.
Is your date pure in his thoughts and speech, as well as
behavior? What jokes does he tell? What music does she listen to?
What movies does he watch? What books or magazines does she read?
Are they pure or suggestive? Mind pollution can lead to disrespect
of the opposite sex.
6. TRUTHFUL - Too often couples play games when they are becoming
acquainted... playing games in a relationship is a form of
dishonesty... Marriage isn't a game. It's a serious lifetime
commitment. Search your own feelings and share honestly during
your courtship. Be You.
7. GOOD HEALTH HABITS - No one wants to marry a slob - and few
do...Bad health habits are difficult to break. That is why it's
best to look for a person who has already established positive
health practices.
8. ACCEPTS RESPONSIBILITY - Here are some questions that might
detect irresponsibility: ... Does she see things that need to be
done and do them? Does he volunteer to help? Does she get to
places on time? Does he make lame excuses to get out of
responsibilities? Does she take her talents seriously and work to
improve her skills? Does he take care of his car and other
personal possessions?... Think about it. Just how responsible is
the person you are dating?
9. GOOD SENSE OF SELF-WORTH - Often in a dating relationship,
individuals with a poor self-esteem glean a sense of value
from the person they're with. They become dependent on their
to make them feel good... If you don't want to live a lifetime
having to tiptoe around a person's fragile ego or having to
hold yourself back for fear of how your spouse will react,
then be careful not to get emotionally involved with someone
who has a low sense of self-worth.
10. LIKES CHILDREN - Before marriage you may discuss children,
but unless you're around a lot of children and can observe your
date interacting with them in a wide variety of situations, you
really don't have any idea about how he or she may discipline
your children in the future. Seldom do both parents totally
agree on how a child should be raised. Finding someone who at
least likes children is an advantage.
11. A PERSONAL RELATIONSHIP WITH GOD - It's very important for a
marriage partner to have a personal relationship with God. Look
for someone who is spiritually sensitive and willing to follow
God's law. A Spirit-filled life is one filled with love, joy,
peace, patience, gentleness, goodness, faith, meekness and
temperance (Galatians 5:22,23). A person who exhibits these traits
is certainly easier to live with than someone who
doesn't... What about your date? If you're interested in a real
Christian, make sure his faith is part of his life twenty-four
hours a day.
12. ACCEPTS YOU JUST THE WAY YOU ARE - True love is unconditional
love... The important question to ask is, "Do I love her faults?"
Only when you can truly love the total person, including all the
points and bad habits, can you accept your mate for who he is
and not secretly wish you could change him.
13. WILLING TO GROW - Good marriage partners grow together. They
encourage each other to maximize their knowledge, skills and
potential... Make sure the person you date seriously is the kind
of person who is open to learning and will make changes when
changes need to be made.
14. AFFECTIONATE - The ability to express love through words and
actions is vital for an intimate love relationship... look for
tender words, acts and touches that are given naturally and
"appropriately" throughout the day, and not just in private.
