Seeking happiness: finding pain
There is someone at the office who is voicing my inner feelings and placing me in front of a figurative mirror. She says she sees potential in me far beyond this place; if I could get over my fear and figure out exactly what job I want. She also said she doesn't want to see me here in a year.
True, Ebay, Staples, and tape stock ordering (what I did today and will do in the future) were not part of the plan of my life. My goals for this job were to learn to project 35mm and become Apple Certified in Final Cut while having a high-speed internet connection. So far, I have tackled neither. I need to refocus.
Someone else said to me that I really wouldn't have to work very hard to get what I wanted. Odd, but just when money was becoming a real hardship, this comes along.
I know it will be easier to get out sooner rather than later, but I still need/like some of the perks that come along with the druggery.
To me, this job is a partial perfection, so close to what I dream for myself, and yet so far away.