CHEERLEADER NINJAS
PLOT-A holy-roller school official heads off a smear campaign against a group of college cheerleaders.
VIOLENCE-Comedic ass-stomping.
SEX/NUDITY-Full nudity and a couple topless shots, courtesy of Skinemax dynamo Kira Reed.
WHY I WATCHED IT-Cheerleader movies are an institution unto themselves, and have contributed some of the best (and worst) entries in the realm of b-movies. The title alone was too great to pass up, and Kira Reed has always been one of my favorite late night cable actors.
THE DOPE-Ever wonder what a Troma movie would be like if you removed all the gore and sex? Thanks to CHEERLEADER NINJAS, you need wonder no more. Taken on its own merit, it's a silly low-budget romp that is frequently fun to watch and dripping with b-movieness. However, given that it seems to really want to be something sicker, CHEERLEADER NINJAS comes across as "Troma Lite": a goofy exercise in bad taste, featuring silly humor and gross jokes, with none of the pesky blood, dookie, or excessive nudity to get in the way of the confusing plot. There are indeed several hilarious moments in the film, but overall it does play like a watered-down Troma film. With a few more head crushings, amputations, and lots more nudity from the cast, this would make a fine, classic entry in the Troma library. But as it stands, this Lions Gate release looks and feels like Troma (no doubt thanks to the presence of CITIZEN TOXIE and TERROR FIRMER director of photography Brendan Flynt) but lacks the sickness and sexiness we've come to love from uncle Lloydie's beloved company.
Fans of "star" Kira Reed, who knocked it out of the park in past starring roles (and is prominently featured on the cover box) will probably be disappointed that her role is actually quite small, as she only appears in a couple brief fantasy sequences and is the only person who gets naked in the movie. Strangely enough, Kira also serves as the body double any time one of the other female cast members opens up their shirt! I didn't see if she got credit for "stunt boobies", but she should have.
I really wanted this movie to be better than it was. It felt too long and, as I said, was a bit too old-school b-movie for me. Instead of this, I recommend the excellent SCREAM BLOODY MURDER or Kira's flick ALIEN FILES.
MEMORABLE SCENES-One of the geeks has an older, dumb jock brother that keeps invading his sexy dream sequences. Whenever this asshole appears, yelling and beating up the geek, I laughed pretty damn hard. The dialogue and performance is great.
NOTES-The DVD release from Lions Gate will feature a director commentary track. I must admit, this movie's Official Website is even better than the movie itself. Check it out.

(November 2003)

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