Abusestoriestwo

Page Two -

Abuse Survivors
Stories

Megan's Story Of Domestic Violence

Hello my name is Megan and I am 20. All my life there has been abuse in my family, since the day that I can remember. But it wasn't just with me - my mom was married to a man that hit her. I was the youngest out of 11 children and I always thought that nothing was going to hurt me. I always said that all the things that had happened to my mom were never going to happen to me.

Then when I was 14 I met this man that I just had to talk to. He was 18 and we had nothing in common, but I always had to be with an older man - everyone told my mom that I was looking for a dad. The first year I was with him was so great, we did all kinds of stuff, then at 15 I came to be the mother of his baby. My mom gave me the choice of having an abortion or moving out - I chose to move out. My mom gave this man the right to marry me - I had no idea, I was still only a child myself. I lost my own child to a beating that happened because I did not come home on time from school. This was not a beating from my mom, but one from my husband.

That was my last day of school. After that he sent me out to work while he stayed at home and drank. I always tried to be at home and made sure that things were just right, I knew that I could die if something was wrong. All this time my mom and I talked and she said what was happening was part of being married and that it would stop after a while. There was never any sorry from him though, instead it was always next time I will end your life. At this time I was 17 and found a friend and wanted to go out and do things. On my birthday he came around to the house I was at and beat me with a wooden bat. I didn't know what I was supposed to do, this was the man that loved me. He sent me to my mum and she got me cleaned up - I think that was the day that I was supposed to die.

He had a plan for me because he thought that I was no longer pure to him, and him alone. I tried to stand up for myself, but all this got me was harder and more abuse. He finally got a job and I stayed home. He made good money and all was good until the day that he came home and I was gone. I bought a bus ticket and left on the bus - but it wasn't good enough, he was there waiting for me. I ran, but still he was there. It seemed that it wasn't my time. He was scared - scared of what?

By then I was 18 and he had taken my life and left me with nothing. I was in a shelter and still he came to find me. Then I met another man, he was so great, he stood by me all the time I was in the shelter and then I finally got on my feet. My husband left me and I was free with the man of my dreams standing right in front of me. I let it all go though because I thought that he wasn't the man for me. I went back to my husband and got beaten for another year. But then my husband left me for another girl and once again I was free. The man that stood by me and helped me is now the person who is in my dreams. I call him my husband, and he calls me his wife, and we live a great life.

I want everyone to read this and know that even when you feel that there is no way out there always is.

Story of Domestic Violence

I had met this guy, Ash, and thought he was SO cute, charming and everything I wanted. We started dating only a few days of knowing each other, and then moved into our own house only after 3 weeks of dating. Everything was "perfect" at the beginning, but soon started going downhill. He started drinking more, smoking weed and taking pills. He'd stay out all the time (when he wasn't working) with his friends, and I never went with them. So I'd stay home, cleaning, cooking, doing laundry, watching TV, etc. I didn't have a car, so I couldn't go anywhere. Well, he'd only come home like once during the day, to eat something, and then leave with his friends again. He started "dealing", buying from another state and selling in ours. He obviously quit working, and I would ride along with him, just so he wouldn't do anything too stupid. Plus I used to live in the other state. Things started getting out of hand. He'd be out dealing, and then he'd come home, all messed up, and yell at me. He'd call me names, insult me and make me feel like trash. We were supposed to be "engaged" by then, but it didn't really seem like it. Then one of the times, he went to the other state, to buy, he got "jacked" of $525. That was our rent, and some of his friends money, so people started threatening us.

He cheated on me with another girl, and i was SO mad. She wasn't even pretty, so that made me feel worse. Although I was mad, he said he'd never do it again, so I believed him, and we stayed together. Then he started talking crazy, saying he really liked her, and that he liked me too, but didn't want to have to choose just one. I was so hurt, but figured we didn't mean it. I told him he needed to choose one. Well, we quit sleeping together, because I never knew if he'd just been with someone else or not. Then one night, this girl, Lindsey, told him that I said something, that I didn't. We both barely knew her, and he believed her over me! We all left, and went to his Dad's house and Ash got really drunk. He came outside, where I was and started yelling at me to come inside. I did, and then he chased me and pushed me on the bed and started punching and hitting me. He got on top of me, and started choking me, I could barely breathe. I was screaming for help, and his Dad came and tried to hold him back, but Ash threatened to kill him. Ash kept hitting me and calling me names, and then I got away and ran outside. He ran after me and kept hitting and punching, this whole time, it was mostly in the face. His friends and Lindsey, were going to leave and then Ash went over to ask Lindset one more time, if it was true. She sat there, looking at my bruised face and told him that it was. She was known to get scared by just about anyone, so I knew she was lying because she was scared.

He told me to get into the car, because we were going home, and on the way he kept calling me name and yelling at me. He kept swinginghis fist at my face, and I started to cover it, because I didn't want him to break my nose, and then I saw that I was bleeding from my mouth. He asked why I was covering my face, and I told him cause I was bleeding, and he said, "good, I want to see you bleed." He told me, he was going to kill me when we got home and I was so scared. We got home, and he was too tired to keep hitting me, so he just laid on the bed, and I went to look in the mirror, at my face. He had busted both my lips, bruised the side of my face and my neck, from trying to choke me to death. I cried some more, I couldn't believe this happened, and I felt so bad, like it was my fault. My face hurt so bad. After the first hit or two to the face, my face went numb, but the feeling was coming back. He told ne to come lay with him, and I was still shaking and scared, so I did. He said, "you know i'd never really hurt you, I love you, I'm so sorry about tonight. Just come lay with me." So I did. I could barely sleep, I thought about leaving, or even beating HIM, since he was all weak and tired now, but couldn't, I was also afraid he might wake up, and kill me. I stayed with him, for two more days, when I was given the oppertunity to go to that other state, to get my GED. I was SO happy, I THOUGHT he would be too, but he was furious. We woke me up the next morning, yelling, and saying that i was leaving him with everything, and started throwing my stuff. I thought he might hurt me again, so I ran to the neighbours, and called the cops. He got taken away, in handcuffs, and I never saw him again, I kept in touch online, because I still loved him. He was only in jail for once day, and then there was a court date, but i said I didn't want to press charges and never went, since it was out of state anyway.

His life has just gotton worse, he's been in and out of jail, on worse drugs, been sleeping around, and gaining a lot of weight. Me, on the other hand, am engaged, to the sweetest man, he tells me i'm beautiful almost everday, and that he loves me. He's not only my fiance, but also my best friend. He knows about Ash, and promises he'd never do anything like that. I'm now pregnant and so much stronger. I know that I don't have to stay with anyone that hits me or treats me bad. I'm better than that. I WOULD like to press charges on Ash, but not sure if I could. I was still in love with him, and couldn't press charges, but now, I want him to get justice. I don't want him to hurt anyone else like he has me. But with my beliefs, I also believe, that he'll get what he deserves, and that everything happens for a reason. I've grown up with physical and emotional abuse, so it wasn't the first time, but i'm trying really hard to make sure it is the last time. I'm tired of people hurting me. I'd like anyone that would like to talk about abuse, or about this situation, or anything, to e-mail me at; [email protected] Thanks.

My Story Of Abuse, by Saddened Laughter

My family has always been tangled in abuse and threats, even from when I was little. There was always yelling and screaming and in turn I tried to solve it all, but I couldn't. I never really experienced distrust and a really bad case of abuse until I was nine.
I remember the night clearly, and that is the worst part- because it's been four years.
That night I had been scared from my bed by thunderstorms, so I had gone to see if I could sleep in the bed with my father. He made room for me so I did, and easily fell asleep.
I remember it was early morning when I first felt it. I had worn my jeans to bed and I felt someone or something undoing them. My eyes shot open as a hand slid down and.
I can't go into detail at this point because it still scares me pretty bad and It's really, really hard to deal with. But I do remember the mistrust and deception that went coursing through my body, I remember thinking it was only a dream as I slowly pulled away, giving the excuse of going to the bathroom.

I remember looking at myself in the mirror, my eyes only half open. My jeans were unbuttoned and my hair was disheveled.
It was only a dream I had reasoned, Dad wouldn't do that to me, I was his little girl.
So I zipped and buttoned my jeans back up and crawled back into bed, laying on my stomach and sleeping the furthesy away from him.
Then the inevitable, or so it seemed, happened. He drew me to his side and began slipping his hand down and getting closer to sticking his finger down me.
At this point I realised it wasn't a dream and I pulled away, giving the excuse that I was keeping him awake.

I tiptoed back to my room and slowly crawled into bed. I couldn't sleep with the light on anymore and I stared at the ceiling for what seemed like hours when it was only minutes.
I remember the worst part about the experience was for one thing, the alarm clock. I still hate alarm clocks, especially ones with red letters. It seemed for a long time that whenever I closed my eyes I would see that stupid alarm clock flashing it's red numbers at me.
The second worst thing was the morning after and school. In the morning we carried on our usual routine, getting donuts and a drink and the gas station. He stared at me the whole time, and grinned, asking me if I was o.k.
I stifled all my emotions and tried to remain happy, and nodded.
Then in the classroom I felt so tired and I leaned my head on my desk, a friend of mine, actually most of my friends, asked if I was o.k. for the rest of the day. But I couldn't tell them a thing.

When I got home I broke down and told my mom. That night I couldn't even so much as LOOK at his car without freaking out. I couldn't sleep with the light on, and I counted on my new comfort object. It was a stuffed animal I have to take everywhere, even now. It was a dog-stuffed animal and I can't sleep without him near me. It's kinda stupid but it's a comfort.
The next day I was forced to go to some place called the 'Hope House' or something along those lines.
My mon and I were interviewed and I was forced to point out when he touched me and tell them everything, but luckily I had my stuffed animal.
Through the years I was forced to see him a few times with family by me, by a rude councellor, - we stopped seeing her thank god.
But them I met another councellor, Neva, who has become my best friend and is helping me heal.
Of course, I have to see him again - but with others near me. I'm really scared, and I don't know why.

Through all this I've shed many, many tears, my sister hated me for a period and I was afraid to even walk the halls in school.
I'm not deathly afraid of being alone anymore, but my head still conjures up wild ideas when I'm alone.
The court is still debating over me, and the taped interview in the 'Hope House' has 'mysteriously' disappeared. That's the worst part about that man I used to call my father, his father was very rich so he could pay the court system off.
The thing that scares me most about that night though, is the druggy feeling I felt. What if I had been drugged and something else happened? That's what scares me the most now.