Title: Core
Series/Sequel: Prequel to Kidnapped
Author:Lydia aka Vinca
Pairing(s): Clark/Lex
Category: AU
Disclaimers: Smallville characters not mine. *sniffle*
Rating: NC-17
Author's Notes: Thanks so much for the feedback, and patience with my
slow writing! :)
Part 10
How he managed to get home with tears threatening to blind him, and
the voice of Lionel saying 'I told you so' ringing in his head he
didn't know. Just that he got there and ran into the castle and to
his room without stopping for the concerned looks that he passed by.
They were paid to look concerned anyway.
He threw himself on his bed and sobs that he held in all the way to
his room burst out of his chest and into the pillow he clutched. He
felt like his heart was ripped out of his chest, and tossed to the
wolves. He tried to calm himself but the sobs and hitching cries
brought on his asthma. He pulled out the lower drawer of his dresser
gasping painfully. He fumbled with the inhaler before taking several
sprays of the medication. He set it down calmly on the nightstand and
mentally shut down all the feelings that raged through him. It was
something that he learned when his father was alive and it came in
handy now.
Once he had a hold on himself he got up and took a long scalding
shower. He tried to scrub the remembrance of Clark's touch and feel
from his skin. As he did, he tried to commit those same sensations to
memory. He admitted that on lonely nights he would remember Clark and
drink most likely. He frowned at that thought. 'If I can keep it
down.' The mere thought of it made him sick to his stomach and that
confused him. He had never been nauseous of alcohol. It had helped
him get through some tough times.
He suddenly thought of Clark's words and was hit with a wave of pain,
dizziness. He gasped and placed a hand against a wall in the shower.
When the dizziness passed (he knew the pain wouldn't for a long time)
he shut the water off and got dressed in a over sized sleep shirt. He
felt cocooned in its warmth and weight and sat on the windowsill to
look out at the sun setting in blaze of gold, orange, purple, and
pink. He thought about Clark that day they were together and a tear
slipped down his cheek. He wiped it away and studied the moisture on
the tip of his finger with interest. His defense kicked in and his
mind became detached from his wallowing self. Something else Lionel
had taught him, for when they had meetings and Lex was upset. He used
it now and got up. He dressed again in slacks and a sweater before
heading downstairs. Before he got to the door Cliff stopped him.
"Sir. Roger Nixon is on the phone. He wants to talk to you about the
location of the drop off."
Lex nodded and followed Cliff. He would deal with this problem and
now. Since he and Clark were no longer together he had no story. He
intended to put Roger in his place and then take care of some things
he needed to do.
"Luthor."
"Mr. Luthor, its good to hear your voice. Now listen-"
"No you listen Nixon." There was a shocked silence over the
phone. "What you thought I couldn't figure out who you were? I think
you need to rethink this before you don't exist as a person. After
all computer glitches do happen and no one is safe from having their
social security numbers from being lost in such a glitch. I suggest
you find something else to do with your time since the negatives of
your photos are gone, and the copies were burned. You have nothing
Nixon, so back off now and don't ever try to threaten me again."
The silence stretched and Lex was about to hang up when Nixon found
his voice. "How...How did you find those negatives?" Lex smirked into
the phone and rolled his eyes.
"I'm a Luthor did you forget that quickly? Just know that nothing you
do is secret, and all of your ties have a tie of their own Nixon.
Have a good evening."
Lex hung up and walked back out to the front door. He jumped in his
car and was off to Metropolis. The road was deserted and he was going
eighty with his CD player blasting Sade, when he saw a blur out of
the corner of his eye. He looked over to see Clark waving wildly as
he kept speed with the car. Lex's heart throbbed painfully at the
sight of him and he turned back to the road and went faster. He saw
Clark zoom away and then his headlights picked up flannel and jeans.
Lex slammed on the brakes and the car swerved to avoid Clark. He
almost crashed into a ditch when the back of the car lifted and he
was slammed forward into the seatbelt as the car lost forward motion.
He put the car in park before jumping out of the car to scream at
Clark.
"Are you out of your mind?! What were you doing?" Lex's heart was
beating harshly against his ribcage as he stared at Clark with pain
filled eyes.
*
Clark was sitting in the living room with his parent's as they
continued to drill him about Lex. He had suddenly seemed to come to
himself around round ten of the discussion when his parent's were
about to give up.
"I can't I raised a son who would hurt another so carelessly." Martha
got up to leave after those words when Clark gave her a peculiar look
that made her stop in her tracks.
"I agree with your mother Clark. I've never seen you so blase about
someone's pain. I had thought that Lex's heart would be safe with
you."
"Lex's heart?" Clark shook his head and vague memories of this
afternoon drifted in his mind. He remembered being angry and
resentful for some reason, but everything else seemed to be blocked
out. He looked up to find his parents staring at him intently. "What
about Lex's heart?" The two looked at each other and then at him.
"Do you remember anything about this afternoon Clark?" Martha asked
softly as she saw signs of the wonderful young man she had helped
raise. He looked confused and looked back and forth between them.
"I remember being angry. And resentful about something. What
happened? Why did you guys look so upset a minute ago?"
"Clark what do you remember happening today?" Martha was very
suspicious now. Clark was not a forgetful man, and he was pretty much
clueless about something that should have definitely stood out in his
mind.
He scratched his head and thought back during the day. "I remember
getting up and taking a shower and doing my chores. Then I ate
breakfast with you guys before going to the loft to make something
for Lex."
"Anything else son?" Jon and Martha were kneeled down on either side
of Clark.
"Um...Oh! Yeah I remember Cresi coming in the morning to tell me
something about Lex. It might've been a dream though. What happened
guys? I feel like I'm missing something important."
"Clark...Clark you and Lex fought." Martha and Jon watched Clark
closely. No remembrance of the fight was shown on his face.
"We did? I think I'd remember fighting with Lex." At their sad looks
he became worried. "Okay if you say we fought, what did we fight
about?"
"We don't know. All we know is that Lex looked hurt, and he ran out
of here fast, and you didn't seem to care." Clark worry progressed as
he listened to his mother speak.
"I have to go to him." His parents stood with him and followed him to
the door.
"Clark. He was looked heartbroken. I think you might have to work to
get back into his good graces." He winced and nodded before zipping
off. He was bewildered on how he could forget something like a fight
with Lex, but he knew that was to think about later. Right now he
needed to see his lover and make things right between them that he
didn't remember making wrong.
Now he stood in front of Lex who looked like he wanted to kill him.
And looked like he had a great deal of heartache.
Clark took a shuddering breath and stepped forward into Lex's
personal space. Lex stepped back and growled at him. Clark's instant
instinct was to subdue Lex, but he fought against it knowing that
that was not a good idea right now. Lex needed his heart to be
mended, not bent to his wishes, which would effectively trample it.
"I'm sorry." He saw Lex open his mouth to say something biting and
cruel, but he stepped forward and put a finger to his lips, putting a
hand on the small of his back. "I don't know what I said to you, or
did, but I'm sorry and I want you to forgive me. Take me back."
Lex's bitter laughter tightened his chest painfully. "Take you back?
Don't you remember that you don't want to see my lying face anymore?
Oh! Or was it that you wanted to get a last lay from me since it's
all I'll ever be good for. But be careful because whatever I touch is
drowned with pain and darkness." He tried to blank out the feel of
the large strong hand on the small of his back, and the horrified
look on Clark's face. "Just go Clark." He said in a whisper and
twisted away wrapping his arms around his weak shivering body which
was fighting his mind to get back to the warm arms, strong arms that
could steady him, could hold him up through everything if they wanted
to. He felt those said arms wrap around his waist and a head bury
itself against his neck muffling a groan.
"Tell me I didn't say that." Lex tried to fight his body's
inclination to lean against Clark, but his body seemed to have a
stronger will than his mind at the moment.
"Don't tell me you don't remember. You were very clear in letting me
know you didn't want me anymore." Clark's breath hitched and he
turned Lex to face him.
"Lex, I don't have anyway of showing you that it wasn't my true self.
I could never say anything to you like that, and..." His voice broke
at the pain he felt for causing his beautiful mate heartache and pain
he could hear, feel, and see standing out in Lex's every move. "And
you are the light of my life, the sun to my world that revolves
around you. You are the other half of my soul. And if you will take
me back I promise that I will never leave you. I will stand beside
you forever."
Lex's eyes shined in the moonlight that painted his skin alabaster
and smooth. His throat worked and he turned his face away after a
moment. "I can't risk letting you hurt me again." As he spoke Sade's
smooth voice sang 'No Ordinary Love'. He didn't think life could get
any more unoriginal than to play that at this moment.
"I won't hurt you again Lex. Trust me. Be my mate." Lex looked up
sharply into Clark's eyes and stared into them for a long while. He
saw nothing but loyalty, devotion, and deep love that soaked into his
cold limbs, making his heart beat alive with the love that was shown
for him to take. He was weary, but for Clark he would try anything.
After all as fate decided to remind him their love wasn't ordinary.
"I trusted you with my body and mind once before Clark. Can I do so
safely again?" At Clark's truthful and devoted nod he gave in. His
arms went around Clark's neck and his legs wrapped around a slim
waist while arms encircled him in warmth and held him close to him.
They stood like that as 'By Your Side' played softly through the
still night air.