Paul stood looking panicked at Gina’s heaving breasts. His mind was screaming that they wanted to be set free from their lacy restraints while his conscience was reminding him that their closest friends were in the other room devouring three flavours of fondue. "Oh god put them away," he begged and took the opportunity to close her shirt.
          "I thought it’s what you wanted," Gina pouted, moving forward and toying with the buttons of his shirt.
          "Are you insane? Of course it’s what I want but not with a group of people in listening distance," Paul whispered, his hands creeping under her open shirt. "I’m just not that much of an exhibitionist babe. Despite what several of our guests might tell you."
          "Think of it as your engagement present to me," Gina chided and kissed his cheek. Her hands slid down onto Paul’s belt and he jerked away.
          "Hey," he giggled, slapping her hand. "Since when were you such a nympho?"
          "Since when were you such a prude?"
          "I’m not a prude I just don’t want our first love making session in a week to be against the fridge."
          "Where’s your sense of adventure?"
          "About to go and enjoy the fondue before it all goes," Paul mused and crossed his arms.
          "You’re no fun," Gina huffed, crossing her own arms to imitate him. "This is supposed to be our night."
          "I thought that was why we were having the fondue party?"
          "It’s not enough."
          Paul looked at her curiously. "What more do you want darlin’?"
          "Let’s just do something spontaneous and stupid," Gina suggested, smirking. "Like?" Paul asked, raising an eyebrow.
          Gina glanced around the kitchen and then strode over to the breakfast bar. She snatched up her car keys and then walked over to the window, which she opened as wide as she could. "Let’s escape via the fire escape and go to your apartment and fuck until it hurts."
          Paul blinked several times as he tried to comprehend what his future wife was suggesting. This was not the same Gina who’d battled with embarrassment and neurosis when they first met. No this Gina bandied about provocative propositions and was suggesting something completely and utterly irresponsible and selfish. A wry smile spread across his lips, this side of Gina was not only so much like himself it was disturbing but so damn sexy that he was halfway down the fire escape before he even managed to utter ‘It’s so on.’

          "You know this cheese and beer fondue tastes better than it looks," Mikey declared, dipping another piece of bread into the sauce.
          "I like the chocolate," Abbie piped up as she sucked the chocolate off the end of a strawberry. Danny found himself watching this action and having a rather rude thought. He shook the idea from his head and quickly poured himself another glass of wine.
          "They’re taking long enough," Richard declared, voicing the thought everyone else was having.
          "Yeah, I wonder what they hell they’re doing?" Tim agreed and looked over his shoulder. He couldn’t see well enough into the kitchen to answer his own question.
          "I imagine they’re doing each other," Abbie shrugged as she noticed Danny looking at her strangely. He went wide-eyed and choked on his mouthful of wine. "Strange man."
          "Maybe someone should ask them when they’re coming," Mikey declared then winced at his phrasing. "That sounded rude."
          "Rude yes but apparently they’ve not been having much in the way of sex so I doubt that’ll be an issue," Amanda mused and caught the attention of the other guests.
          "Oh please elaborate," Tim beamed. "Is little Paul not rising to the occasion?"
          "I think it’s some mutual non-arousal," Amanda nodded. "You have no idea how toey they’ve been."
          "You wanna bet?" Rich mused.
          "Knowing full well over here," Tim added.
          "You’ve no idea," Abbie chimed in.
          Amanda looked at them annoyed. "So is someone going to find out what’s happened to our hosts or not?"
          "I vote Rich," Tim chided and Rich shot him a withering look.
          "What if they’re naked and copulating up against a kitchen appliance?" he groused.
          "It’s not the first time you’ll have walked in on him mate," Tim grinned and prodded Rich with a fondue fork.
          "Don’t remind me."
          "Oh share," Amanda begged. "I had to!"
          "I really think delving into their sordid histories is kinda mean," Danny declared, deciding someone had to be the voice of reason.
          "He’s only saying that because he never got a chance to get into Gina’s undies," Abbie cackled and all rude thoughts vanished from Danny’s mind and were replaced with nasty things to do with an empty wine bottle. "Don’t look at me like that, you know it’s true."
          "Yeah anyway," Amanda chided. "About that time you caught Paul…"
          "Oh for heavens sake," Laura groaned, getting to her feet. "Apart from the fact they are probably listening to everything we’re saying I’ll go check." The rest of the guests held their breaths and looked on eagerly as Laura strode across the room and into the kitchen.
          "Well she didn’t scream and come out covering her eyes," Khym chided and patted Rich’s thigh. He felt he was being mocked and sunk into his cushion a little more.
          Laura reappeared several seconds later. "Well unless they’re hiding in the fridge they’re not in there."
          "What?" the other guests said all at once and got to their feet. They dispersed and began searching the rest of Gina’s apartment before congregating back at the table a few minutes later.
          "They’ve fucked off," Mikey said bluntly. "I can’t believe they fucked off from their own engagement party."
          "How very un-Ginalike," Abbie mused.
          "But how?" Khym piped up. "We’ve all been sitting here and no one saw them leave."
          "Fire escape," Danny laughed, thoroughly amused by the turn of events. "It’s out the kitchen window."
          "What are we supposed to do?" Amanda frowned looking slightly despondent.
          "I think we should stay here and greet them when they get back from wherever it is they’ve gone," Tim mused, lifting his wineglass to his lips.
          Everyone looked at everyone else and a silent agreement was made to wait for the stars of the party to return.

          "I feel like a bad human being," Paul declared as he fumbled with his keys to unlock the door to his apartment. "How could we just up and leave all our friends like that?"
          "I know," Gina nodded and grinned mischievously. "Isn’t it hysterical!"
          "No, it’s awful Genie," Paul pouted as he finally unlocked the door. "We’re bad friends, this was a bad idea and we should go back."
          "Oh listen to you Mr Voice of Reason," Gina giggled, stepping toward him. "And here I was thinking that you got a kick out of spontaneity and being very, very naughty."
          "There’s a time an a place for everything," Paul swallowed, although with her being so close he could feel her breasts pressing against him, his reasoning was becoming blurred.
          "You know you’re absolutely right," Gina cooed and brought her lips close to his. "If you want to go back then go, I won’t stop you," she said softly, her warm breath making every nerve in Paul’s body tingle. She gently pushed past him into the apartment, leaving the door open as she disappeared into the darkness.
          Paul stood leaning against the door frame, his heart beating a million miles an hour, his breath ragged. He thought about all their friends and the alternative to marching into his apartment and making love to his future wife. If he went back he’d have to endure the same old stories. Hundreds of wedding related questions like, "Have you set a date?" and "What colour underwear will you have?" and despite its unique format the evening would still be the stock standard engagement party that would be forgotten about by the morning, never to be discussed again. Unless their kids suddenly got some obsession and wanted to know how their parents met - wait - did he just think kids?
          The truth was that the whole evening was supposed to be about them, even Gina had said so. So was it really wrong that all he wanted to do was spend the evening ravishing the woman he loved? They’d been so busy with work, with party preparations, with uncooperative sexual organs that the reasons behind everything had been a bit forgotten. Actually, now that he thought about it, the only thing that should be puzzling him about the whole event was why the hell he was still standing at the door? He quickly leapt forward, slammed the door closed and hurried through the apartment to his bedroom.
          "I wondered when you were getting here?" Gina chided as she sat on his bed rather seductively in only a cute pink satin bra and panties set.
          "I think I’ve caught your neurosis," Paul declared, pausing for a moment and then realising getting undressed would be a good idea. He fumbled rather stupidly with his shirt, ended up bouncing around as he pulled his shoes off and nearly impaled himself on a jar of paint brushes as he removed his pants. He stood breathless a moment. "I think I wore myself out getting undressed."
          "You’re such an idiot," Gina giggled as she got to her knees and Paul grinned stupidly. "Come give me some McDermott love," she added cocking her head to the side.
          "As you wish," Paul breathed and crawled onto the bed, kneeling in front of her.
          "Don’t you go quoting the Princess Bride at me," Gina chided as she gently reached out to touch him. His heart was still beating very fast and she had the odd sensation that they hadn’t been very close in general for a longer than just the sex void of late.
          "I thought you liked that movie," Paul queried as he enjoyed the feeling of her cold hands on his chest.
          "I like Carey Elwes," Gina smiled as they inched their lips closer.
          "You can call me Westley if you like," Paul breathed as they shared a teasing kiss.
          "Oh Westley," Gina gasped and wrapped her arms around him. "Will you whip off your tight black pants, pull out your sword and give me a fencing lesson I’ll never forget?"
          "As you wish," Paul said, a wry smile on his lips, his eyes looking deeply into Gina’s. "As you wish," he said softer as they finally relented and clung to each other in a heated kiss as they sunk onto the mattress.

          "Snork is not a word," Danny frowned glaring at Abbie.
          "Is too," Abbie retorted. "It’s the name of a cartoon character."
          "Yeah cartoon character," Danny groused. "Not a real word."
          "Just because it’s not in the dictionary…"
          "People, help me here," Danny begged and looked around the rest of the table. They’d taken to playing Scrabble to pass time and while doing so it had emerged that Danny was a in fact a Scrabble Nazi.
          "I wouldn’t say snork was exclusively a word," Rich shrugged.
          "Does it mean I can’t use Fnord?" Tim queried.
          "They HAVE to be real words guys," Danny huffed. "Play properly or don’t play at all."
          "Were you not held enough as a child?" Mikey scorned as he looked down at the only words he had contributed: ‘cat’ and ‘loo’.
          "You’re the kid who always chucked the board on the floor when you lost aren’t you?" Laura chided, helping herself to another glass of wine.
          "You should see him at the annual trivia night," Amanda sighed. "He gives us all study notes."
          "You have to be prepared for these things…"
          "Do you not know the meaning of fun?" Abbie asked, raising an eyebrow. "You’re allowed to lose, no one will die if you do. No volcanoes will erupt, millions of Asians won’t be washed into the sea and your beloved Swannies still won’t will a premiership."
          "More wine Abbie," Khym piped up and quickly refilled Abbie’s glass in an attempt to placate her before she stabbed Danny with shards of broken goblet.
          "Oh well excuse me for having passion," Danny groused. "At least I don’t sit on my arse, getting drunk and obnoxious and then wondering why no guy wants me. Believe me, that part is glaringly obvious."
          "Guys," Rich piped up. "Chill!"
          "Fuck you Brannigan," Abbie snapped, got to her feet and stormed off into Gina’s bedroom.
          "Well this is going well," Tim half-smiled.
          "Yeah mate," Mikey agreed. "If we’re lucky we’ll get to play Cluedo without getting the game out."
          "Abbie, in the kitchen with a butcher knife," Amanda chided and Danny shot her daggers.
          "You’re suppose to be my friend," he huffed.
          "Oh honey I am," Amanda soothed and patted his shoulder. "I’ll clean up the blood so Gina won’t get angry and will read the eulogy at your funeral."
          "May your son grow up to be a raging homosexual," Danny said bluntly and Amanda looked vaguely startled and turned to her husband who was being very quiet.
          "We take his Tinky-Winky away when we get home," she declared and her husband nodded.

          "You know you do the funniest facial expressions when you’re having sex," Gina mused dreamily as she nuzzled into Paul’s neck. She kissed it gently as he turned his head to look at her bemused.
          "Yeah, you ain’t so pretty either," he chided, feeling absolutely spent.
          "Oh I know," Gina agreed and then felt the need to explain. "I dated a guy who had mirrors everywhere. It was revolting but I discovered I had a birthmark."
          "You know you’re so much nuttier when you’ve got the pheromones going," Paul said before sighing. He felt his eyes growing heavy, which with his already relaxed body meant a nice nap was about to take over.
          "What are you doing?"
          "I’m a guy, we just has sex what the fuck do you think I’m doing?"
          "Looking adorable," Gina cooed as she propped herself up on her elbow.
          "You make me sound like a puppy," Paul pouted. "I want to be rugged and manly."
          Gina giggled and Paul looked taken aback. "Sorry honey."
          "Bitch," he yawned and crept his hand onto her hip under the covers as he began to doze again.
          "Babe you can’t go to sleep," Gina declared as she sat up and then forced him to sit up as well.
          "Why?"
          "Because we should get back to our guests."
          "I’m hoping they’ve all fucked off."
          "Paul!"
          "What? I’m over it," he smiled coyly and gently dropped a kiss on her neck. "There are better things we can be doing."
          Gina let a hum escape her lips as she felt his hands caress her bare flesh. His lips worked on her neck and she felt him nip at the skin. She couldn’t help running her fingers through his hair. They started tilting toward the sanctity of the mattress again. "Wait! We need a maturity moment here."
          "Like hell we do," Paul frowned and tried to tease her back into his arms.
          "You will not get round me with sex," Gina scolded, although she highly doubted that was true. "We’ve got to be responsible and go back to our guests and apologise for leaving them like we did."
          "Are you insane because I’m not sorry?" Paul said blankly, noticed Gina’s frown and softened his approach. "Y’know this night is all about us and for me that’s not trying to impress our friends, it’s lying here in each others arms and whispering sweet nothings."
          "Oh and don’t try being sweet either."
          Paul went wide-eyed and pouted. "If you loved me…"
          Before he had a chance to finish his sentence Gina was out of bed. She grabbed a blanket from the end of the bed and wrapped it around herself.
          "Genie," Paul whined, still having no desire to move.
          "I love you Paul," Gina sighed and rolled her eyes. "But god you can be a right pain in the arse some times."
          "Are you going home wrapped in a blanket?" he continued, still pouting.
          "Yes, I plan to drive naked darling," Gina sarced. "I’m going to have a shower since I stink for sex and sweat."
          "Fine," Paul sighed heavily and watched her leave. He heard the shower start up and lay there a moment before it occurred to him that she’d still be naked in the shower. He leapt out of bed and headed for the bathroom. "Darlin’ we’ll conserve water if we share…"

          "You can’t honestly believe that," Laura scorned, glaring at Tim.
          "All I’m saying is that I know Paul and I don’t really think Gina’s his type," Tim shrugged. "Richard, Michael, back me up on this."
          "I’ve no idea what you’re on about," Mikey said quickly and then smiled stupidly at Laura.
          "I have to admit I was sceptical," Rich shrugged. "But they seem really happy, in fact I’ve never seen Pauly so smitten in my life."
          "You guys are so mean," Khym groused. "You’re all their friends, you should all be pleased for them. I don’t think they could be any more happier or settled."
          "You’ve clearly not been a witness to some of their neurosis then," Amanda sighed, working on a plate of cheese and crackers. "I mean Gina feels completely out of her depth and Paul is totally commitment phobic."
          "Here, here," Tim agreed. "It got serious way too fast."
          "He wanted to have her kids after only knowing her two hours," Mikey nodded and got elbowed by Laura.
          "I think that’s sweet," Laura sighed dreamily.
          "If they get hitched I doubt they’ll last a year," Tim shrugged. "I mean if Paul’s past is anything to go by…"
          "This isn’t about the past though," Danny cut in. "This is there future mate and you shouldn’t say stuff like that."
          "He’s kinda right though," Rich agreed.
          "Oh my god have you listened to yourselves?" Abbie spat, finally reappearing from the bedroom. "These people are our friends for Christ’s sake! Gina is my best friend ok, and I’ve watched her get fucked over by several guys and I’m so happy that she’s finally sound someone who actually gives a shit about her. Did you know that after one date Paul flew to Adelaide to see her because he couldn’t bear to be apart? And when they fought over his ex-fiance…"
          "See…" Tim said smugly and got a cube of cheese flicked at him by Amanda.
          "He bloody begged her to forgive him and you know why? Because, and this might come as a shock to some of you hypocrites, but they LOVE each other. Yes, that’s right, they’re actually devoted and happy and I don’t think it matters if they’ve been dating days, weeks, months or years because I sure as hell wish I could be that happy."
          "Here, here," Danny agreed and banged the stubby he’d acquired on the table. "Look at it this way people, right now they’re getting laid and we’re all here debating their future. Surely we’ve just wasted a lot of hot air?"
          "He’s got a point," Abbie agreed and raised an eyebrow. He smiled, pleased with himself as they shot each other a glance. "I still hate you."
          "Fair enough," Danny shrugged and brought his beer to his lips as the others sat in a startled silence.

          "And here we are back at the start," Gina mused as she and Paul reached the top of the stairs.
          "Yeah," Paul agreed, crossing his arms. "Genie."
          "Yeah," she sighed turning to face him.
          "You know I’ve been thinking about it and I don’t think we abandoned our closest friends to purely have sex."
          "Oh…"
          "I think, and you can slap me if I’m wrong, but I think we used it as a means of escape because we didn’t want to face up to the fact that this is real. We’re really engaged, we’re going to get married and we’re going to be together forever."
          "It does seem a very long time," Gina nodded and wrapped her arms around his waist. "That’s a bit of deep thinking you’ve been doing which is pretty impressive for a guy who’s had sex several times in the last couple of hours."
          "Can we have a maturity moment, please," Paul said softly and Gina nodded. "I need you to hear this, we promised honesty."
          "Ok," Gina nodded as Paul cupped her face in his hands.
          "I’m absolutely terrified and totally exhilarated about this huge step in our relationship ok," Paul said in a quiet, controlled voice. "But I’m petrified I’m going to walk in there and not be able to reason with people about why we’re doing this. I mean, why are we getting married exactly Genie?"
          "Because you proposed I should think."
          "Beyond that?"
          "Because we love each other."
          "Beyond that?"
          Gina looked at him blankly a moment and then smiled wryly. "I don’t know and I don’t care, to tell you the truth. Why should we have to reason with people anyway? We know why we’re doing it."
          "Do we?" Paul said worriedly. "I don’t think I got that memo."
          "We’re doing it because you love it when I kiss you," Gina said warmly and kissed his cheek. "We’re doing it because I love it when you go all deep, which gives your forehead cute worry lines and you bite your lip."
          Paul stopped biting his lip and tried to smooth out his forehead. "Yes but…"
          "Paul, we’re doing it because we couldn’t live without all those silly little things that we love about each other so much and to hell with having to explain that to anybody," Gina smiled. Paul added ‘I love the way she resolves my problems for me’ to his list and kissed her deeply on the lips. Still holding onto each other Gina unlocked the door and they threw it open to a round of applause.
          "Oh Jesus fuck you’re still here!" Paul gasped, not meaning to voice what he was thinking.
          "Congratulations on breaking the drought," Tim piped up and raised his glass to them.
          "We hope it was worth it," Danny added as he cracked open another beer.
          "Did you guys happen to hear anything that was said out there?" Gina asked as they stepped inside and closed the door.
          "Yes," Amanda smiled while the others nodded. "You guys are so adorable."
          "We’re sorry we ever doubted you," Mikey perked.
          "You doubted us?" Paul said, vaguely upset by the declaration.
          "Yes but we argued it out," Rich perked. "It’s not important now mate."
          "O-k," Paul winced and looked stunned at Gina who was looking much the same.
          "So are we having a toast?" Amanda enthused and quickly filled two more flutes of bubbly, which she shoved into Paul’s and Gina’s hands.
          "To the happy couple," Mikey cheered and raised his glass.
          "Oh please," Tim scorned. "Could you be any less original."
          "I’ve lost all feeling in my ankles," Mikey pouted. "So no."
          "Your brain is in your ankles?" Rich said blankly.
          "Are we having a toast or not?" Abbie huffed as some wine sloshed out of her glass.
          "There’s no need to be impatient," Danny scowled. "We can all make toasts."
          "Guys can we stop arguing for five seconds," Amanda groused, taking a sneaky sip of her own wine.
          There was an outbreak of bickering, cheeky retorts and general raised voices before Laura yelled. "SHUT UP!"
          "Why darling," Mikey gasped. "I never knew you could be so vocal," he gave her a weak smile but she simply glared at him further.
          "I hate to break it to you but while you’ve been squabbling like children our hosts have fucked off again," she snorted and drank her flute of wine over in one gulp.
          The other guests looked around guiltily for a few moments before Rich dared to once again say what everyone else was thinking. "Wonder where they’ve gone now?"

          "I take it all back hon," Gina whispered as she and Paul listened at her bedroom door. "We should have stayed at your place as our closest friends have clearly gone mad."
          "Now you know why I’d hoped they’d all fucked off," Paul whispered back. He straightened up and Gina followed suit. "Ah well," he shrugged and raised his glass. "To the hope that, that lot don’t attack each other with the rented cutlery on our wedding day."
          "Cheers to that," Gina giggled and they clinked glasses.
          They drank their flutes of bubbly and then let out a unified sigh as their guests had fallen into an argument about whose fault the argument was.
          "What now future hubby of mine," Gina breathed. "Oh how wrong does that sound."
          "I can think of a few time wasters," Paul grinned placing their glasses on the dresser. He then turned back and pulled her into his arms. "And they’re a lot more fun than playing pin-the-blame on the party guest." He guided her toward the bed, stopping only to press play on a portable CD player which he turned up very loudly to block out the grousing of the guests.
          "I do like the way you think," Gina cooed and elicited a squeal of surprise from Paul as she pulled him eagerly onto the bed.