"You awake?" Penny asked as she turned over in bed. She had been trying for the best part of an hour to escape to the land of nod but with thoughts of Chris coupled with having to share a sleeping space with Kirsty the task was never going to be easy.
          "I’m not even nearly asleep," Kirsty replied, moving onto her back. "You?"
          "Unless we’re sleep conversing I’d say I’m awake."
          "Good point."
          "So anyway," Penny sighed. "I can’t sleep."
          "I’m not exactly racking up the z’s either you know."
          "True, but you don’t have a crippled man in your house."
          "You don’t know what we keep under the floorboards."
          "Shut up."
          "Sorry."
          "I really don’t know what to do about Chris."
          "Aren’t you flattered that he’s passed on his promotion to you?"
          "Sort of," Penny breathed. "I mean, I’d rather have got there on my own merit than have it gifted to me by an ex-boyfriend."
          "No offence hon but you’d never have got there on your own. Despite the fact you’re as talented as the rest of them you have breasts and that is a major issue in the engineering world."
          "Who would have thought a couple of glands could prevent you getting a promotion huh?"
          "They’re guilty of holding you back."
          "They’re the reason I never got full marks is Chemistry."
          "What?"
          "Couldn’t see the text book to study."
          Kirsty started to giggle. "You idiot!"
          "What," Penny mused. "It’s partly true."
          "So can I give you some advice?" Kirsty asked propping herself up on her elbow. "Friend to friend, woman to woman?"
          "Now I’m scared."
          "Trust me, I have no desire to recreate your Chemistry book dalliance," Kirsty chided. "I think Chris is by and large one of the best things to ever happen to you. If you give up and let him go I know you’ll regret if forever."
          "Yeah but he dumped me, just dumped me because he got a promotion," Penny countered. "I mean who’s to say he wouldn’t do it again?"
          "I don’t think he’d be stupid enough to."
          "He’s a man."
          "I stand corrected," Kirsty mused. "Or lie corrected, I’m not sure of the correct terminology."
          "Now who’s an idiot?"
          "We’re not talking about me here," Kirsty scorned. "We’re talking about you and Chris."
          "There is no me and Chris."
          "You said he was never attracted to Sienna."
          "I also remember saying he dumped me on a whim."
          "He came back though, he risked his life to come to you."
          "He was fleeing his mother."
          "Penelope!" Kirsty said sharply. "I know he’s been an idiot, a big well toned, fantastic arsed idiot but as an outsider I’ve seen the way he looks at you. Despite your different lives you’re very much alike. You’re both freakishly intelligent, have an odd obsession with trashy 70s television and you’re clearly both deranged. Pen, if you can’t put your pride behind you for five seconds and admit how you really feel then I’m taking you into the garden and giving you an enema with the good hose."
          "You know you make more intelligent points at 3am," Penny remarked and then let out a heavy sigh. "Ok, to avoid having a hose inserted in my colon I’ll admit I’m still more than a little attracted to Chris."
          "A little?"
          "More like a lot."
          "So why are you hiding from him and taking up my bed space?"
          "Because I’m absolutely terrified," Penny said softly. "He’s ‘the guy’ ok? He’s the one I’d willingly give my womb over to, the one who could tempt me into a life of PTA meetings and last minute dashes into town on Christmas Eve to find that one special toy. Do you get what I’m saying?"
          "Jesus fuck," Kirsty gasped and sat up. "Pen, you’re talking about, well, marriage and kids and other serious shit I don’t even want to think about."
          "I know," Penny pouted. "You have no idea how much it kills me."
          "To be apart?"
          "No, to be so willing to give up everything that I thought meant something to me for a guy."
          "Yeah, but is he worth it?"
          "Every last inch," Penny said sadly.
          Kirsty nodded silently and then smiled. "Oh that sounded so rude."
          "Oh get fucked," Penny groaned and pulled the covers over her head as Kirsty fell about laughing.

          Rob hummed to himself as he walked from the bathroom to his bedroom sporting only an Incredible Hulk towel around his waist. He closed the door, dropped the towel and flicked on the light switch.
          "Oh mate, I don’t need to see your nads," Ross declared as he lay sprawled on Rob’s bed.
          "FUCK!" Rob shrieked and quickly pulled on his clean underwear. "What the hell are you doing in here dickhead?"
          "It’s my fucking apartment I’ll be wherever I want," Ross scorned and then quietly scolded himself. "Look, I just wanted to apologise for scaring off whatever her name was."
          "Red headed girl," Rob said blankly. "I never actually found out her name."
          "You charmer."
          "I learnt from you."
          "Hey, don’t drag me into your sinning."
          "Believe me, that’s something I don’t even want to contemplate," Rob chided as he grabbed his deodorant. "So what happened to Kirsty?"
          "She left," Ross replied. "Forgot Jools’s birthday or something."
          Rob nodded as he sprayed the deodorant under his arms and then coughed. "Did you guys make up then?"
          "Does it look like we made up?"
          "It’s hard to tell with you guys."
          "Thanks."
          "My pleasure," Rob smirked and plonked himself next to Ross on the bed. "So, what did she say?"
          "That I broke her heart, that when the accident happened she was scared of losing me and we almost kissed twice."
          "Oh see, that’s great."
          "She also tried to kill me and further traumatised me by deliberately driving at trees."
          "Woah," Rob gasped. "You really fucked her up."
          "I know," Ross groused. "I’m such a fuckwit and it’s probably lucky that I’ll be jetting off here, there and everywhere soon because I’m sure she’ll be better off without me. No, she deserves better than an inconsiderate, cowardly..."
          "Wanker," Rob suggested and Ross shot him daggers. "I’m helping."
          "The point is while I’m here it’s just going to make things harder," he continued. "It’s absurd to even consider getting back together and we should make a clean break."
          "Yeah, you’re not to drink any more ok?" Rob breathed and looked bemused at his brother. "You do realise you don’t actually mean anything you’ve just said."
          "That’s not the point," Ross frowned deeply. "They say if you can imagine something..."
          "The only image you have of her is of that fantastic rack."
          Ross allowed himself a small smile. "It is fantastic."
          "See, destroying all ties with her means no more playing with Fred and Rose," Rob sighed. "And by the way naming her tits after sexual serial killers is fucking sick."
          "That was supposed to be our little secret."
          "I suggest you gag yourself during sex then, for my sake if nothing else."
          "Well (a) we’ve broken up so there will be no sex and (b) you can always move back to the olds."
          "But you need me to help you do up your pants."
          "Never, ever repeat that sentence in public again, ever."
          "It’s true though," Rob chided as he pulled back the covers and climbed into bed. "Do you plan to stay there all night?"
          Ross went doe-eyed. "Can I?"
          Rob gave him a shove and Ross got up giggling. "I wouldn’t want to sleep within inches of your hairy arse anyway."
          "Hairy arse or not man," Rob said looking seriously at his brother. "Try and get some sleep for a change."
          "Robert honey," Ross cooed in his best impression of their mother. "I’m going to be just fine," he smiled and headed out of the door. "Now where’s my jar of little blue pills."

          Julia awoke in a cold sweat and sat bolt upright. She glanced frantically around the room and noted the time on the glowing beside clock read 4:30am. There was so much to take in just in those few seconds of eye opening that she was glad she wasn’t quite sure of the location of her glasses. From what she could see in the relative darkness she was in a large bed, with soft pale sheets. A thin curtain covered the window where moonlight was pouring in and lighting up the finely chiselled features of the lovely Ryan.
          He was lovely Ryan; there was no doubting that. Julia could check off the things in her head that proved this. He was attentive, could cook and looked fabulous in khaki shorts. Ryan had also proved to be a quality lover, and Julia still quivered as she remembered the feeling of his rough hands against her skin. All his loveliness combined actually made what she was about to do seem particularly mean and had she not been feeling so very confused she might not have been prepared to go through with it.
          Julia slid out from beneath the sheets and fumbled her way through the dark, collecting her clothes as she went and happily locating her glasses in the hall. She quickly dressed, grabbed her bag from the living room and crept out of the front door.
          It took her a little over forty minutes to arrive home and she still felt terribly guilty about fleeing. To be honest she hadn’t really wanted to but Julia was certain it would have been a rather uncomfortable breakfast had she stayed.
          As quietly as she could Julia unlocked the door and stepped into the living room. "Oh fucking hell," she gasped getting the shock of her life when she found Kirsty sitting on the couch watching infomercials with the volume turned down.
          "Where the hell have you been?" Kirsty scorned and paused to yawn.
          "Out," Julia replied, not wanting to share details with anyone, especially not her best friend on the planet. "Why aren’t you doing your second favourite hobby?"
          "Because Pen is like a frickin’ orchestra in bed."
          "Pen?"
          "She’s hiding from Chris," Kirsty sighed. "It’s a rather long and tedious story that evolves purely around her own neurosis and god forbid the realisation that she’s not as happy as she thought she was."
          "Do you realise you use bigger words after 3am?"
          "Freaky isn’t it?"
          "Very," Julia nodded.
          "Oh sorry for forgetting your birthday," Kirsty winced. "I guess we’ve all been a bit distracted lately."
          "Eh," Julia shrugged. "I’ll live."
          "We’ll make it up to you." Kirsty smiled. "Chuck a party or something."
          "You hate parties."
          "I never said I’d be there."
          "You’re a good friend."
          "I think so."
          Julia shook her head. "How’d things go with Ross?"
          "Might have been better had Pen not called me," Kirsty shrugged. "I don’t know. I mean I don’t know if its love or if I’m just feeling sorry for him."
          "Let it be love," Julia chided. "No one else will have you."
          "Oh thanks, that means a lot."
          "It’s the best I can do when I’m this tired," Julia yawned. "I’m gonna crawl into bed. You’re welcome to join me if you don’t want to endure Pen and her bodily functions."
          "Thanks," Kirsty yawned. "But I might just stay here a bit longer."
          "Night," Julia said quietly as she headed down the hall to her room. She paused outside Kirsty’s bedroom and heard Penny making a lot of freakish noises including calling for her cat. "Weird," she breathed and padded into her room.

          Monday – Back at Work…

          As reluctant as she was, Penny forced herself to go home early Monday morning to organise herself for work which was something else she was reluctant to indulge in. Penny unlocked the door and was more startled than she should have been to see Chris sprawled on the couch asleep.
          "Are you dead?’’
          "I was starting to think you were."
          "Nah I’ll always be here even when they drop the bomb. It’ll be me and the cockroaches.’’
          "There’s an attractive image.’’
          "You’re not looking so hot yourself," Penny remarked noticing Chris was looking a little too pale to be healthy. "You should probably see someone with medical expertise today. I mean you’ve had a big weekend.’’
          "I would have been fine if you hadn’t up and abandoned me," Chris said hissing through his teeth as he sat up a little. "I mean who leaves someone who’s recently had surgery, on their own?"
          "Well technically I wasn’t expecting you and you were more than welcome to stay in the safe, reliable care of your mother."
          "That’s not safe, reliable care Pen," Chris huffed. "That’s a stressful, unhealthy environment that I could never have recuperated in successfully."
          "Well you can’t stay here forever," Penny groused. "This place is nowhere near big enough for Bear.’’
          "Oh speaking of Bear. He kinda relieved himself behind the laundry basket and there was no way I could bend to clean it up."
          "Oh fantastic! Just want I want before work," Penny groused. "To be elbow deep in dog shit."
          "Sorry."
          Penny let out a frustrated huff and stalked into the laundry to deal with whatever mess Bear had left. It didn’t take long to clean and then she showered, dressed and dropped a bowl of Two-Minute noodles into her bag for lunch.
          "Do you want me to take you home?" she asked grabbing her keys.
          "God no," Chris gasped. "Could we just talk for a minute, please?’’
          "I really have to go," Penny said quickly. "But I’ll be back at lunch to take you to a doctor or vet or something."
          "Pen!" Chris whined in vain as the door closed and he felt a surge of pain from his abdomen. "I really wish I’d remembered my painkillers," he breathed as he gently lay back down to wait until the throbbing subsided.

          Julia strolled past the various cubicles at work. There was Jane’s that was decorated with about a million pictures of her two kids. She had pictures from when they were born up until the latest ones where they were in paint and sucking on paintbrushes. Then there was Giles who had pinned up a selection of his favourite comic strips along the partitions along with his beloved, humorous coffee stained mug that sat proudly on his desk. Julia’s cubicle wasn’t at all personalised, unless the empty Bounty wrapper and purple floppy disk she’d left loitering on her desk counted.
          "Jools!" Rachel who was one of the friendlier women that worked in the office gushed. She was barely out of a TAFE course and got overexcited about everything from lunch to the new financial year.
          "Rachel!"
          "You’ve got to see them."
          "See what?"’
          Rachel let out a girlish giggle, grabbed Julia’s wrist and dragged her into Julia’s own cubicle. "Those!" She remarked pointing to a large bunch of very bright flowers.
          "Oh, who are they from?" Julia asked, picking up the blooms to inspect them.
          "No idea," Rachel shrugged and looked on eagerly as Julia removed the small card from its tiny pink envelope.

          Hey Jools,
          I just wanted to wish you a Happy Birthday and to thank you for all of your help since the accident. You’re such a valuable friend, that I’m not sure what I’d do without you. Anyway, I hope you had a fantastic day and I’ll catch up with you soon.
          Love Liam

          Julia wasn’t sure if it was the gesture, the kind words or the fact he’d described her as friend but she felt the tears welling up in her eyes.
          "Are you ok?" Rachel asked, dropping a comforting hand on Julia’s shoulder.
          "I’m bloody fantastic," Julia swallowed. "Bit of a cold that’s all."
          "Oh you poor thing," Rachel pouted. "Should I get you some lozenges?"
          "No," Julia sighed as she sunk into her chair. "But half a mud cake and two coffees might help."

          Kirsty sat frowning at a piece of paper, which had only a few details pertaining to a fancy new breakfast cereal. The makers of said cereal wanted the agency to create and entire advertising campaign to bring ‘Fruity Flakes’ into the public arena. Kirsty had been given the task of creating the all-important slogan and this was proving to be a much harder task than she had anticipated.
          "They’re real fruit but flaky," she announced to her empty office. "God no, that’s terrible. Hmm, just like an apple only crunchy, wait, apples are crunchy."
          "Have you got that slogan yet?" Patrick groused as he appeared at the door.
          "Almost, I’m just doing the final tweaking," Kirsty lied and faked a smile until Patrick and his sour face disappeared. "Oh I’m so screwed."
          "Hey have you seen this?" Tabitha from accounts enthused as she waltzed into the room.
          "Tabs I’m busy," Kirsty huffed. "Genius at work here."
          "If you said you were belly dancing naked I might be more convinced."
          "Thanks for the faith hon."
          "No problem," Tabitha chided. "So anyway, look it’s our Ross."
          Tabitha plonked a newspaper down in front of her and Kirsty was surprised by the little picture of Ross next to a very good review for his show. She read it intently twice smirking at the line; the nipple lasers will have you on the floor.
          "Isn’t it fantastic?" Tabitha beamed. "We’re going to blow it up and put it on the noticeboard."
          "I’m sure he’ll be thrilled," Kirsty remarked deadpan.
          "Oh he is, we’ve demanded he come in later so he doesn’t forget all his old friends."
          "I didn’t think he had any old friends," Kirsty mused and received an annoyed look from Tabitha.
          "So you won’t be putting in money toward getting a cake then?"
          "I’ll give you $2."
          "Well that’s hardly generous but then I guess you were never as close to him as the rest of us," Tabitha scorned and turned on her heel.
          "Says you," Kirsty mumbled to herself as she tried to ignore the surge of panic that gripped her as she realised she’d have to face Ross whether she liked it or not.

          "You really didn’t have to do this you know," Chris said in a hushed voice and he and Penny sat in the waiting room at the hospital.
          "Like hell I didn’t," Penny frowned. "When I got home you were writhing in pain on the couch."
          "Writhing is such a strong word."
          "Why can’t you just admit you’re in pain?"
          "Why can’t you get off your highway of neurosis and have a decent conversation?’’ Chris retorted and flinched a little in pain. "I mean, all I’m getting from you at the moment is very few words and a glimpse of your back and you flee the room."
          Penny frowned deeply at Chris, crossed her arms and focussed her attention on a poster of Tinea treatments. They sat ignoring each other until a doctor appeared and gave them a broad smile.
          "Good afternoon Mr Waylon-Jones would you like to come this way," The doctor enthused. "Mrs Waylon-Jones you’re welcome to come…"
          "I’m so not his wife," Penny said curtly.
          "No," Chris agreed and got gingerly to his feet before he followed the doctor.

          "So remind me again why I’m buying you lunch?" Kirsty asked as she looked over her menu at Julia.
          "Because I had to escape the office," Julia replied. "And you were a bad friend and forgot my birthday."
          "I knew there was a glitch," Kirsty chided. "What’s with the flowers?"
          Julia passed Kirsty the gift card and she opened it and spent several seconds studying it.
          "Well?"
          "It was very sweet of him."
          "Sweet," Julia gasped and frowned at Kirsty. "He called me his friend."
          "Still, at least he cared enough to send you flowers," Kirsty shrugged. "That’s more than I did."
          "That’s not the point," Julia pouted. "I thought I meant a little more to him than that."
          "I think you’re reading way to much into it."
          "Oh who asked you anyway?"
          "Well…"
          "Don’t even go there."
          "If it’s any consolation I’m stumped when it comes to writing a slogan for ‘Fruity Flakes," Kirsty sighed. "And some braniac decided that inviting Ross back for a small celebration would be a good idea."
          "I love ‘Fruity Flakes’," Julia mused and then looked sympathetically at Kirsty. "I thought you were very nearly back together with him?"
          Kirsty shrugged. "It’s probably better to avoid the heartbreak or at least that’s what I’m telling myself."
          "I don’t believe that for a second."
          "You know what’s funny though," Kirsty smiled half changing the subject. "Tabitha from accounts reckons I’m the only one who wasn’t very close to Ross."
          "You licked chocolate sauce from the cleft of his buttocks," Julia giggled. "Which is more than she’s done I imagine."
          "He hates everyone who works there."
          "Apart from you."
          "So are you going to see Liam and thank him?"
          "Oh subtle subject change."
          "Nice answer avoidance."
          "I’ll answer yours if you answer mine."
          "Ok, so are you?"
          "I think I should, so yeah."
          "Hmm, should I have fries or a sandwich?’’
          "Hey!" Julia gasped and lobbed a sugar packet at Kirsty. It hit her in the side of the head.
          "Ow, bitch!" Kirsty pouted and rubbed the side of head as Julia giggled at her.