He was looking for the chicken
How do you fit an elephant in a safeway bag?
You take the F out of way and the A out of safe.
There isn't an f in way?
Exactly, there isn't a f-ing way you can fit an elephant in a safeway bag.
The tooth fairy, Santa Claus, an honest lawyer, a free whore, and an old drunk were all walking down the street. They all simultaneously spotted a 100 dollar bill, who picked it up? The old drunk of course, for the rest are just mythical creatures.
How do you kill a blonde?
Put a scratch and sniff sticker at the bottom of the pool.
Three women rob a bank. One a brunette, one a redhead, and one a blonde. The cops chase after them and they run down an ally. All that there are to hide in are these three potato sasks. Each woman hid in a potato sack. The police came up. They pointed at the bags, and asked, "Don't they look lumpy?" They kick the first and it says, "meow.", and they say, o its just a cat. They kick the second and it goes, "wolf.", so they say, its just a dog! They kick the third and it goes POE-TATE-OOOOO.
