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Author�s Note: To fully understand this story you have to read my 1st ever fanfic piece I Want Love, this fits onto it. The idea follows on from the news that Dianne is to leave L&O. Unfoolish It was mid-afternoon when Nora arrived home, usually tired from travelling she felt revitalised by it. Driving home on almost deserted roads, the sun shining, a clear blue sky greeting her, the breeze in her hair and her music on to loud as she sped along. Perfect, all too perfect for a respectable middle-aged woman. To be acting so unlike herself, to feel so free and unperturbed � for a change. How delightful life could be, how sweet. And yes there were definitely some perks to driving an open top car, hell actually driving herself for a change not some stuffy sticking-to-the-speed limit type guy she normally had chauffeuring her around. She took a shower when she got in, sat in her dressing gown on the balcony and had coffee. Unpacking and a quick tidy of the apartment revealed what she had always suspected � Jack was pretty much useless at keeping things in order. But where she would have usually screamed at him for it she smiled. He would never change. She put wine in the refrigerator to cool for later, and put on a light dress and did her hair ready for him coming home. There was much to talk about. * * * Jack reluctantly left his office at just after six, there was no reason for him to rush home, but it was damned hot in there and he decided he needed a cool shower and a beer. He knew she was home when he pulled his bike in next to her car, a deep breath as he took off his helmet and mounting the steps to their apartment. Waiting for the shit to fall � again. He closed the door after him. �Jack.� She called from the kitchen. He threw his keys into the bowl on the telephone table. Wasn�t he becoming domesticated! �You want some wine?� She called again. That calm voice, throaty, gentle, soothing � like nothing had happened, like she hadn�t done anything wrong. Torn between loving her and god damn strangling her. She came into the hallway and stared at him as he stood leaning on the outer door. �Wine?� She urged holding the bottle up. He looked up at her from beneath heavy eyes, stern eyes. �Do I want any fucking wine? Is that all you have to say?� He walked towards her. �You disappear for days, won�t talk to me, don�t call. And now you�re back, and everything�s normal again and that�s it. Well it�s not it Nora, so you�re back and turning my life upside down and I�m supposed to sit here and wait for the next time you disappear in a fit of selfishness.� He took the bottle from her hands and threw it at the wall. She watched the red liquid trailing down her white walls onto her perfectly shiny floor, ruined. �That was an expensive bottle.� She whispered then looked up at him. A look passed over his face, one she hadn�t seen before, regret? Pain? He turned away from her and grabbed his keys. �Jack I�m sorry, I wanted� I needed to be alone. But I want to explain, I have things to tell you.� �Such as?� �Perhaps I was wrong to run away like that but it wasn�t you or us that was the problem it was me and until I could find out what was wrong with me we stood no chance of sorting this out.� �And now you know?� �I�m not going to run for DA again Jack.� �What?� Now he faced her again. �Please, don�t let�s have this conversation here, let�s sit down and talk properly.� �You�re leaving?� �Hogan Place yes. I can�t do this anymore, I was wrong, it isn�t me.� She smiled. �Isn�t ironic, I wanted it so very long and it ends up screwing me up.� �Why do you never even share these thought with me until the last minute?� �I am sharing it with you, Jack I didn�t even know that was the problem until I was away from it. I stayed at this idyllic place Jack, I want to show you�� �I don�t want to hear it right now, do you even realise how messed up I've been the last few days, thinking it was over. That for some reason once again I�d ruined it�� He was beginning to shout again. �I�m sorry.� �For what?� He shook his head and turned away letting himself out of their apartment. She didn�t drag him back, he needed time too. Besides she wasn�t his keeper and she wasn�t about to have yet another argument with him. She wasn�t in the mood, he�d come back, he always did. She looked at her dyed walls and decided she should start by cleaning up. As she passed by the mirror that hung in the hall she stopped and wiped the red liquid on her cheek. But it reappeared � blood, it had cut her. * * * Jack didn�t reappear so she went to bed alone. She must have been asleep for a good few hours when she heard a door close. Vaguely aware of somebody moving in the room she opened her eyes and looked up at Jack watching her. She stretched the arm that was under her head and the covers slipped down to her waist as she turned over. Her pale skin shone in the darkness and she always loved the way it captivated his eyes. Even after two years together he still stared. She smiled and reached out for his hand. Squeezing it as he slipped off his jacket and shoes. �I should learn not to walk away from an argument with you.� His voice was deep and steady � somewhat reassuring, but then there was no doubt he would come home again � not for her anyway. �I knew you�d return. There was no reason for you to fear I might not.� Her hand wandered down and opened his trousers then she lay back and watched as he undressed, gloriously naked and climbing in next to her his mouth was on hers in a second, harsh and demanding kisses to satisfy his doubt, his fear, his anger. Then over her face seeking forgiveness for the incident earlier. �I�m sorry.� �It�s only a small cut but the walls may never be the same.� �I�ll paint tomorrow.� She laughed and rolled onto her back pulling him with her and allowing him to rest between her legs. Kisses around her neck and over her chest, fingers groping for her breasts and those words he moaned against her skin, I love you, and her name like a mantra in the silent night air. Perhaps she was in the wrong, selfish, always wanting things her way but in some strange destiny way he suited her and she him and it worked. * * * Jack was already up when she climbed out of bed, she�d become too used to sleeping in late. He was on the couch reading the papers when she wandered past, touched his shoulder and headed for the window watching as the day began over the city. �Nora.� �Hmm.� �I never was one for one night stands.� She smiled. �Liar.� She went and sat in his favourite chair, curled her legs beneath her and set about explaining. �I have decided, as I told you, that I don�t want to be DA anymore � apart from that I don�t think my health could cope anymore Jack.� He raised an eyebrow. �Dangerously high stress levels the Doctor said. So I�m stepping down, going to try and take life easier for a while.� �And what will you do?� She shrugged. �Nothing for the moment, then maybe return to lecturing, see what opportunities present themselves over the coming months.� �And what will I do?� �I�m sorry?� �How hard will it be for me to wheedle my way into the next DA�s affections the way I have into yours? Not easy being a smart arse you know, they don�t always appreciate it.� �Sometimes I didn�t even appreciate it.� She smiled. �I would also like to spend more time planning our wedding, I don�t want it rushed and me still in some kind of daze when it happens.� �You want to postpone it?� �Only for a few months, until I�m free of work and have spare time to do things how I want them done.� �Always the boss hey.� �Always demanding too.� �If that�s what you want then we�ll do that.� �You�re always so willing to oblige.� �I know, it�s the easiest route through life I�ve found.� �Funny!� �Seriously, you should have spoken to me earlier about this instead of just disappearing.� �I didn�t disappear I just needed time alone.� �But after everything we�ve been through together. All the stuff with Lita and then you and that guy�� �Please Jack, not that.� She got up and headed for the kitchen uncomfortable with the progression of things. �I know you�d rather forget it happened but it is part of us now and we should deal with it.� �We did deal with it, not it�s over, now Lita is as normal a part of our lives as any other member of the family, now me running away from our problems is history and soon me being DA will be history too. We move on.� He grabbed her waist as she passed him. �But not from each other anymore.� �No, I may have made mistakes but I�m not that foolish. Whatever happens from now I will be here to deal with it.� �Alright, and I�ll be stressed at Hogan Place.� �Only until retirement honey.� She stood on her tiptoes to kiss him and then walked back to the refrigerator. �Right, so get on with breakfast woman.� She slammed the door shut. �Now don�t start that again�� Review Story Index Home |