This is to be an archive of all the entries in the "Latest Scores" column so that the homepage does not get enormously long. All other entries will be placed in here after a certain amount of time.
14/15 February 2005:
For a half-day, people racked up some nice points. No one told me about any Feng Shuis, even though there undoubtedly had to have been some. So no points go that way. Players Luis and Livi both receive 2 points due to light scolding for not having a blank tape in on time for the IB orals. Player Roshni received the bulk of the points however. She receives 4 points for a harsh scolding and a bonus point for having Gleason use the phrase, "I am really disappointed in you." Accordingly, Roshni is awarded the Fantasy Stud of the Session. Towards the end of class, perhaps the unthinkable happened: Newman received praise. The Fury showed benevolance towards Newman and said that she knew he would do well on the real Paper 1. Moderate praise is awarded (-3 puntos).
The next day, I was legitimately absent for an English oral...so I don't know what happened in class. The only thing anyone has told me is that the Fury told Kent that she hopes to be at his wedding when she is an old woman. He receives -5 points for an excellent praise plus a bonus point just because. El Predicador and his wedding are therefore given the Fantasy Play of the Session.
On a side note, some of you have told me that I talk too much about what happens to me in class and that I don't report other points that people should get. That tells me one of two things: either you aren't stepping it up in class, or you aren't telling me what's going on. Obviously when Gleason pulls students aside during or after class, I have no idea what is being said unless I am that student. It's even more difficult for me to award points when I skip and no one bothers to take my place as scorekeeper. For example, when I said earlier that there were undoubtedly some Feng Shuis but I couldn't award points, it was because I asked about 5 people who was Feng Shuied while I wasn't there and they all gave me the same, "idk" response. So don't give me shit when your points aren't given to you when you don't tell me.
09 February 2005:
Considering the fact that we didn't do anything in class today, it was pretty brutal. The period started off with ferocious and completely random Feng Shuis. Jeff, Patel, Kim B., Priyanka, and Serena all receive 1 point for being moved about the class for no particular reason. After all of the movement, Gleason began to talk to El Predicador. However, Player Nicole was speaking at the same time. Gleason could not allow this, and thus proceeded to shush Nicole. Nicole appeared speechless...which I suppose was the entire point. She receives 2 points, the equivalent of a light scolding.
Let us not forget about our dear Newman. About the middle of class, Gleason walked over to his desk to lightly scold him about not having picked up his homework from the time he was absent and that he should have known better, being an IB student and all. Through this event, Gleason has provided an interesting riddle: would Newman have actually done the homework if he DID come in to get it the day after he was absent? I mean c'mon, seriously...who's this lady trying to kid? Oh, but Newman wasn't done yet. Apparently Gleason had been avoiding coming over to Newman's desk to critique his writing all period. So when the bell rings for break and Newman exits the room, Gleason rushed over to his desk to grade his work. If this wasn't bad enough, Newman had a feeling this type of crap was going to happen (based on previous experiences). So Newman, in all his wisdom, hid his work for the period among a bunch of other random papers. Reports from within the class confirm that Gleason spent a good time rummaging through the heap of papers just to get to the day's work. Upon finding the correct papers she is reported as asking, "Where's my red pen?" Upon re-entering the classroom, Newman found his desk and belongings to be slightly askew, papers strewn about in an order that he had not left them. He also found half of his work to be missing and the other half covered in red ink; not because of corrections, but rather because she felt that she had to list every possible synonym for everything he had written. Newman receives 2 points for the light scolding and 3 points for the incident previously described.
The Fantasy Stud of the Session is Newman with his big 5 points. The Fantasy Play of the Session also goes to Newman for forcing Gleason to hunt for his work. The next sessions will be on Monday and Tuesday due to the Double B Day. I'm sure that double the Gleason equals double the points, so expect big plays. Also, division point recording has been stopped because it doesn't really matter.
04 February 2005:
Once again due to Newman's uncanny absence from class, the duty of recording points was deligated to another player. This time the job was allotted to Player Torro instead of Player Sam (who failed miserably last time I might add). Torro did a wonderful job with no bias toward himself. To prove this, Torro admits that he was given a light praise based on his writing skills. He is thus awarded -2 points. In the realm of Feng Shuis the only recorded incidences are those of Sam and Nicole. From what we've been told, Nicole's Feng Shui is quite the comedy: apparently she was sitting too close to the door. I have no idea exactly what that means, but I have also heard that the throwing of water was involved. Hopefully, clarification will be given at a later date. Sam's Feng Shui, on the other hand, was nothing more than the classic move that we have all come to know and love. Both players are awarded 1 point.
Player Jona has put points on the board for the third straight session, something we should all be proud of. Jona was taken aside for a 1-on-1 talk with Gleason to sort out this whole Rond�n & Jona v. Fury fiasco. The final judgement was a unanimous 9-0 in favor of forbidding Jona and Rond�n from sitting near each other in class. Jona is awarded 2 points. Maddie and Rond�n were also given light scoldings...apparently...that's what the paper that Torro gave me says anyways. Whatever. They each get 2 points for now. Someone will have to give me the DL on those too.
The Fantasy Stud of the Session is currently being awarded to Player Jona for the second straight week pending the severity of the scoldings involving Maddie and Rond�n. The Fantasy Play of the Session, however, is awarded to Nicole for being too close to the door, being Feng Shuied because of it, and something about throwing water. Who knows...only Gleason could move someone for being too close to the door.
01 February 2005:
Another Paper 1 day, but good news: a very big play was seen by Players Rond�n and Jona, a superb play indeed. At the beginning of class before we got smacked with the Paper 1, Jona and Rond�n sat next to each other in the corner by the TV and talked a little bit. Gleason became irate, giving each a harsh scolding about how she told them last session not to sit next to each other and that she doesn't want to talk to them about it again. Jona was then asked to Feng Shui. For this Jona receives 4 points for a harsh scolding plus 1 point for being moved. Rond�n receives 4 points for the harsh scolding.
The only other Feng Shuis that have been reported to me are those of Torro and Ross. Both receive 1 point. Newman was surprisingly inactive this session, perhaps a result of the recently declared List of Grievances that you can read at the very top of the page. Next session will be Friday, 04 February 2005 and if I remember correctly, we're supposed to be going over the reading comps that she has been giving us for the last couple of weeks. A bloodbath is expected.
27 January 2005:
Finally some action! After 2 absolutely boring sessions, we finally have some worthy plays. The beginning of class started off with a bang as Players Newman and Sam were Feng Shuied probably for being too close to each other ("too close" reads as "in the same row"). Each is awarded 1 point. Player Priyanka was also moved to a random location and therefore also receives 1 point. We are still in the process of locating the spinner that Gleason uses to seat Priyanka.
Towards the middle of class there was an "altercation," so to speak, between Players Jona and Rond�n. Both received a light scolding for talking in class and Jona was moved. These two receive 2 points and Jona is given an additional point for being moved. While on the topic of light scolding, Kim B. wowed the crowd (as you can see, I rhyme all the time), by "invading Brice's personal space" by stretching. She is given 2 points for this light scolding and is awarded an extra point for sparking a conversation about why everyone has their own personal space. Conversely, Player Ross has informed me that prior to class, he was given light praise. For this he is deducted 2 points. Shame on you Ross, shame on you. And per usual, Player Patel disappointed CrunkMoney with an inactive day. Obviously Team Crunklin has to whip her into shape.
This session's Fantasy Stud is Player Jona with a quite impressive 4 points for two offenses. The Fantasy Play of the Session, however, must be awarded to Player Kim B. and her invasion of Brice's personal space via stretching. Sure Kim, you were "stretching."
24 January 2005:
Gleason Roulette has hit a sort of a slump. This time both periods were monopolized by Prueba 2, and what a fun Prueba 2 it was. Half of the class accidently wrote off topic. And for this Player Nicole was slightly scolded. I wouldn't even call it a scolding, but I will give her the full 2 points because Gleason made her rewrite the entire Paper 2. El Predicador y Newman also wrote off-topic. Kent realized it as he was nearing the end of his essay and therefore gave it a creative twist. Newman on the other hand could not be bothered by such things; he turned in the essay as is. This was of course after he was Feng Shuied. Score 1 point for Newman.
The Fantasy Stud of the session is Nicole with an awesome 2 points. The Fantasy Play of the session was of course the Prueba 2 which pretty much owned all who did not read "s� mismo" correctly. That's about all that really happened. Qu� triste, ?no?
19 January 2005:
Unfortunately, this was a sad session for Gleason Roulette as once again Prueba 1 dominated the scene. A feng shui was ordered for the entire class, but since everyone would receive 1 point, I won't bother adding it on. However before class started, both Livi and Newman were taken aside individually and told that they might receive an F for a test that they have not yet come in to take. Both were given a short lecture on how they are IB students and how tests must be taken. For this, a total of 5 points is given to each (2 for a 1-on-1 talk, and 3 for moderate scolding). Yet once again, by the end of the day all would know that Gleason's scornful eye turned towards Newman. Apparently Gleason has been telling some students that Newman does not know any Spanish. The quote relayed to me is as follows: "Se�or(a) X, please give this [homework] to Se�or Newman, he apparently doesn't know Spanish." Newman receives 5 points for Gleason's irresponsibility as a teacher and utter failure as a human being. It is currently rumored that Newman is preparing to declare war. More information will be provided as we receive it.
UPDATE: It has been confirmed that Newman has torn up all reading comprehensions that Gleason issued last session. He appeared angry.
12 January 2005:
Due to my uncanny absence from class, the job of tallying points was delegated to Player Sam for this session. Unfortunately, Player Sam has yet to give me the points he has recorded. Now you may be asking, "How has he not yet given you the points after FIVE days since class was held?" My answer to you is quite simple. I would tell you, "Because Sam is a lazy mofo." And I would be correct. The more of you who get on Sam's case, the faster I'll be able to update (hint hint). Next session is 19 January 2005. I'll be there this time, eventhough I don't know why I bother, so the scores will be updated then by me.
UPDATE: Sam has finally given me the scores for this day. They are as follows: Amanda and Nicole get 1 point each for feng shuis and Brice gets 2 points for a light scolding because he was caught studying for the grammar test in class. Maddie, Ross, Roshni, and Torro all receive 3 points for being caught without homework and bluffing. Maddie receives an extra 2 points for Gleason saying, and I quote, "They have a word for this...blofear." Torro receives an extra 2 points for being told after class that she has no idea how well he writes because he never turns in any homework. Serena and Kim B. both receive -2 points for helping the class out of a jam and winning some light praise. Finally, in the most disappointing play of the week, Sam receives -5 points for a combo of being held after class so that Gleason could moderately praise his writing skills. Boo Sam. Therefore, for this session, the fantasy studs are Maddie, and Torro; the fantasy play of the week is the group of Maddie, Torro, Ross, and Roshni being caught without homework. I must say it was a great effort (or non-effort) by all of those involved.
07 January 2005:
Once again it was a slow day for Gleason Roulette because once again we spent both hours either reading or writing. She did not take us into the back room individualy as she had threatened to last session. But do not fret my pretties, there were still a few comical stories as can be expected from such a class. There was a disturbingly large proportion of feng shuis this class, with some of the most unsuspecting students caught in the uproar. Priyanka, Roshni, Sydeny, Jeff, Jona, Kim B., and Ross were all scattered randomly throughout the room as the Chapter 12 Test commenced. Due to these feng shuis, it is obvious that all cheating was avoided since it is common knowledge that cheating is determined by the so-called 'energy' of a room and not by the factor of cheating itself. Feng shuis were awarded 1 point each.
Newman returned once again in all of his glory this session with 3 points. At first it seemed as though he would go the entire block without ANY points (of course the Fury could not allow that to happen). Towards the end of the second period Newman was reading the plethera of reading comprehensions given out by Gleason previously in class. As she walked around the room she gave him a light scolding for not writing anything down as he completed the first reading. As it turns out however, Newman was planning on (and enjoys I might add) reading all of the comprehensions before starting to work. Gleason seemed confused by this apparent presence of organizational skills. This light scolding was given 2 points. As students were dismissed for Senior Privilege, Newman earned another point for receiving an indirect scolding. In all of her fury, the Fury wittingly warned that students should be writing crap down for her to check as they complete EACH comprehension. It is still unknown whether the direct eye contact to Newman was purely coincidental or not. For these scoldings, Newman shares the title of Fantasy Stud of the Week.
Sam is the other student to share the title of Stud this week and also owns the Fantasy Play of the Week by being caught with a history book in class. Sam obviously had more important things to study in history than to do some lame-ass reading comps in Spanish (my guess is he probably did). Gleason did not take too kindly to the defiance and thus issued a medium scolding which earned Sam 3 points. One might be as bold to say that Sam pulled this trick on purpose with the sole intent of earning points. In fact, I will be as bold to say that Sam pulled this trick with the sole intent of earning points. Either way, I like the cut of his jib; this is indeed the type of moxy that makes GREAT Fantasy Roulette players and pirates. ARRRRRGH MATEY!
In unimportant news, Kim B. got -2 points for receiving light praise. Gleason tried to trick her at the beginning of class about what occurred in a reading comprehension given for homework. But no, oh no, not our Kim. She ain't takin' no crap. After the play, Kim whipped out a Sharpie marker and signed Gleason's gradebook in triumph, then proceeded to do the "Dirty Bird" in the endzone. It is not yet known whether the Gleason Roulette League Commissioner will fine her for this indecency. We also have a new team on the site because of an SL student who was praised by Gleason for doing well in something. CrunkMoney receives -2 points for the praise and will probably sit out for the rest of the season due to a high ankle sprain (a result of jumping up and down for receiving praise from Gleason). Next session is 12 January 2004.
UPDATE: It was recently discovered that Kim B. was held after class by the Gleason for a scolding discussion about her extended essay. This warrants 6 points. While the content and result of the discussion usually warrants more points (a LOT more points), the League Commissioner has decided that the addition of these points would be unfair to the other teams because not all players have the same chance to earn points from an extended essay. Therefore, only the meeting with Gleason after class was awarded.
04 January 2005:
First, I would like to thank everyone for their vigilance and unity the first session back. Because of your alertful eyes, no one was hurt or killed. Strength truly does lie in numbers.
There are a couple of highlights worth mentioning this session although both hours were spent writing compositions. Newman started the year off with a bang (as can be expected) by receiving a light scolding for not doing the compositions in the correct order (yes, I'm serious). When he asked if Gleason had an extra copy of "Liberaci�n Masculina" so he could complete his tasks, The Fury in all her fury said no, then proceeded to give Newman an extra copy of "Liberaci�n Masculina." To this moment we still have no idea what the hell that was about. However, Newman's numbers grinded to a halt at that second as he demonstrated that he in fact knows how to write in Spanish. Gleason issued him no more scoldings, but also strayed away from giving him praise. Sam also received a light scolding for not having his composition paper. Unfortunately for Sam, his points grinded to a halt too, even after crumpling up all of his papers and throwing them into his backpack. If Gleason would have noticed, who knows how brightly this star would have shined. Kim. B received a light scolding for not giving Gleason the TurnItIn.com receipt for her Extended Essay. All light scoldings were awarded 2 points. Jen was given the harshest scolding of the day, when the Fury leaned over her desk to read her writing and commented that her writing was not very good and encouraged her to come in after school to discuss her problems. It is not clear yet whether a tear bonus will be given, so her score so far sits at 4 points. In the world of medium praise, Serena receives -3 points for gaining Gleason's acclamations on her writing skillz (she is uber 133t).
And then there is the play of the session performed by the duo of Kent and Sydney. In proving why he is in Division 1A and why she WANTS to be in Division 1A, both Kent and Sydney spent time and money in buying Gleason a Lassie tin lunchbox and an art book, respectively. Both received lavish praise from Gleason (-3 pts. each) and the rancor of their fellow classmates. The act of giving the presents receives -7 points for each player and +infinite hatred/jealousy from all students. Don't worry...I kid, I kid because I love. But seriously, that was really gay. Even ask Team Workman. He's pissed as hell that he got screwed into taking Kent in the 24th round of the draft. Pobrecito!
Next session is Friday, 07 January 2005 and it plans to be a massacre since she is calling us into the back room individually to talk about random crap. Oh I'm just drooling at how many points will be awarded as each student re-enters the room.
02-03 January 2005:
Last Season's Scores:
Team Mariz: 75
Team Humps: 44
Team Tracy: 35
Drafting is currently underway for the new season of Fantasy Gleason Roulette. Prepare for a fantastic adventure this semester. Since the divisions have been redone, it is expected that the scores will be a lot tighter.
Draft Update: All teams are currently being chosen. The draft results are being reported in real time and are as follows:
1.) Newman (Workman)
2.) Natalie (Wilkerson)
3.) Torro (Shaw)
4.) Livi (Shaw)
5.) Jessica (Wilkerson)
6.) Maddie (Workman)
7.) Crystal (Workman)
8.) Katherine (Wilkerson)
9.) Sydney (Shaw)
10.) Kim B. (Shaw)
11.) Jen (Wilkerson)
12.) Sam (Workman)
13.) Priyanka (Workman)
14.) Ross (Wilkerson)
15.) Luisito (Shaw)
16.) Rond�n (Shaw)
17.) Roshni (Wilkerson)
18.) Nicole (Workman)
19.) Jona (Workman)
20.) Serena (Wilkerson)
21.) Jeff (Shaw)
22.) Brice (Shaw)
23.) Sebba (Wilkerson)
24.) Kent (Workman).
The draft has officially been completed. Trades will be allowed now and throughout the season pending the approval of the team not involved and myself, The Newman. Scoring will begin this session, 04 January 2005. Good luck to all coaches and all players.
Trade: Rond�n (Shaw) has been traded for Roshni (Wilkerson)
10 December 2004:
Well Gleason gave us another Paper 1 so there's not much to say in regards to points. Once again a class Feng Shui was given so that no one cheated on the Paper 1 (because that's what we do apparently), so each player was given 1 point except for Jona who was legally absent. Isn't it ironic when a class wishes that the teacher gives a 2 hour test because they think it's more relaxing than having a normal class with the teacher? There may be more points on the way because I have heard about a few students being taken aside for 1-on-1s, but those won't be added on until I get the full stories.
Anyways, Gleason Roulette appears to be done for the semester. Team Mariz is the official winner and Player Newman has compiled the most points with 27 points. Team Mariz will be given a beautiful certificate of victory which I will also post on this site later. The divisions will be redone according to points and a new fantasy draft will take place over the break. Until then...CONGRATULATIONS TEAM MARIZ!!!
07 December 2004:
Wow!!! We start off today with the Fantasy Play of the Session since it saved most people from being pulled after class and given 1-on-1 talks. Today 2 other Spanish teachers came into class to monitor The Fury's teaching. So obviously in an attempt to make a good impression Gleason did not chastize, embarrass, or break any students down into tears or fits of hysteria. Let's give a collective sigh of relief and round of applause for these 2 teachers; they are truly kings among men.
In point news, despite the fantasy play of the week there were still a few positive gainers including Katherine, Newman, and Jen for being caught without homework. All three players receive 3 points. In an unusal day hampered by visitors, there was an abnormally low number of Feng Shuis. Only one occasion arose in class where there was so-called bad energy around Kim. However, she offset this gain by receiving light praise about her grandmother...no joke. Kim receives a total of 0 points. Player Rond�n receives -1 point this session also for light praise.
Now what you've been waiting for...the absolutely disturbing antics of one Player Torro. He receives a shameful -7 points today for absolutely blatant ass kissing. On two occasions when the Sra. called on other students to give answers, Torro stole the limelight and answered before they were given a chance, thus resulting in laughter from peers and praise form Gleason. On two other occasions, Player Torro struck up conversations unrelated to the class with Gleason and the guests. At times, I could have sworn there was a vacuum cleaner in the room due to the loud sucking sound.
That is all for this session. The next and last session before the end of the semester and the new draft will be 10 December 2004. If there are any updates to this session, you know where to find them.
02 December 2004:
This appears to be a weak fantasy roulette session for all players due to Prueba 1. The only highlights worth mentioning are Feng Shuis by Newman, Luis, and Ross; all three receive 1 point. Luis however negated his gain with a downright shameful use of grammar skills: Gleason gave him light praise for his high grades on the last two tests. Luis receives -1 point for the approval that seems so fleeting when given in this high-anxiety HL Spanish class. Fantasy point updates for this session may be updated due to the fact that I have not received all scores, but don't hold your breath, 3/4 of the class was spent taking a test. Next session is 07 December 2004 and fantasy roulette is expected to return to normal. Breaking Fantasy Wire News: Luis's praise appears to be more serious than first believed. Not only was he praised for grammar skills, the fantasy roulette wire his just obtained information that she told him, "You are going to succeed in life" ...whatever that means. So for this fortune cookie praise, it has been decided that instead of -1 point, this player will receive -5 points. All scores are now accurate.
Whoa!!! Another update: Apparently Gleason has given the same fortune cookie praise to Player Jona as well. Not only this, The Fury showed a rather disturbing side by giving Jona a kiss on the cheek. There is no need to say that both the player and this reporter were paralyzed with fear. Total points awarded to Jona: -8. Also as an update, an inside reporter who shall be called CrunkMoney has informed me that player Nicole was scolded outside of class in the library for wanting to photograph the library ladies. This is a mindblowing play as it pushes her into positive numbers and gives Team Humps the lead in Division IA.
