date

Read: 1 Thessalonians 4:3-5,7
            2 Corinthians 6:14-15
            Song of Solomon 3:5

      Ok, admit it. I KNOW we've all had guy troubles at least once in our lives. Either you like them and they don't like you, or they like you and you're like "no way" or you were so in love with them and you broke up or you got lied to or cheated on...the list goes on. There IS hope though cause you know what? God has a special guy out there who was made just to be with you...unless of course, He's calling you to be single for life (scary thought, I know!)! You just have to be patient and wait for him to come along, and be wise along the way with whom you choose to date! Speaking of whom to date, the Bible also warns against realtionships with non-believers...marriage ones anyway, and since dating can indeed lead to marriage someday, it's smart to refrain from dating unbelievers unless God calls you to. I read a wonderful book by Elizabeth Elliot about her 5 year courtship with her first husband (he got killed in Africa...he was a missionary) and what she learned. Being a very wise woman of God, I feel that I should pass along her wisdom to you all. You can take it to heart if you wish...if you get way confused with relationships, pray. God'll tell you what He wants you to do. He knows His plan. Anyways, without further adieu, here are some quotes from Ms. Elliot's book "Passion and Purity" that I found useful to my own life.
      "Don't push yourself on a guy who's not interested. Let them do the asking." In our modern world, this one sounds pretty wierd. I like it though...it takes the pressure off of me! If a guy likes you, he's gonna let you know, so just wait patiently!
       "Let him take care of you." Don't get offended if a guy wants to open a door for you or carry something for you. Sure, it seems wierd today that some guys still have the heart to do that, but if they offer, take advantage, don't be all like "I can open my OWN door thank you very much!" He's just tryin to be nice!!
       "Give all passions, problems, and pain up to God everytime it comes up." This is a good one for break-ups. It hurts bad, I know. But if everytime you think of him you say, "God, he's yours now, do what you will with our relationship wherever it stands, it's in your hands." God will heal you and take away your pain. He knows you're hurting and it hurts him that you are. Another one that goes along with this one, "If we hold tightly to anything given to us, unwilling to let it go when the time comes or unwilling to allow it to be used as the Giver means it to be used, we stunt the growth of the soul." Totally true...well said!
       "Guard your virginity jealously for the man who will marry you." OH YE-A! Totally don't put yourself in a situation where you'll be tempted to do something you don't want to do. Pray for strength if it's a struggle for you. God won't let you be tempted beyond anything you can handle with Him by your side. Even if you're not a virgin, you can have "second virginity". God has forgivin you for what you did... you are holy and pure again so promise yourself to save sex for marriage from this day on!
       "If your goal is purity of heart, be prepared to be thought of as very odd." This kind of goes with the last one. In today's world of 'safe sex', premarital sex isn't really looked at as bad. I mean, it's on TV, in movies, in song lyrics, all over the place. The world is gonna think you've lost it...probably will think that you're old fasioned....if you wanna stay pure. But we are not of this world, we are God's children and He calls us to be SANCTIFIED (holy).
      "Isn't it altogeather fitting and proper that men and women should hunger for eachother? It is natural indeed. However it's not the only thing God has in mind for us. We are not ment to live merely by what is natural. We are called to learn to live by the supernatural."
      "Unless a man is prpared to ask a woman to be his wife, what right has he to claim her exclusive attention? Unless she has been asked to marry him, why would a sensible woman promise any man her exclusive attention? If, when the time has come for a commitment, he is not man enough to ask her to marry him, she should give him no reason to presume that she belongs to him."   Since I broke up with my last boyfriend and read this book, I think this one makes a ton of sense. Why bother with the dating game? Why not just be friends and if something grows out of it, hey that's great! Consentrate on God and building your relationship with Him and if He wants you to be with someone, then He'll make it happen. Personally I think, for me anyway, that dating is so blah. I'd rather spend my time getting to know God better and working on our relationship instead of concentrating on guys. Sure, it's natural to like guys, but I love God and He comes first. Besides, relationships are way flusterating! I'm too young for all this! Anyways, I hope you got some Biblical insight on weather"to date or not to date". Remember, when in doubt, pray!