Summary: Luke and Lorelai musings. Set after "Forgiveness and Stuff." Disclaimer: Gilmore Girls characters and situations are the intellectual property of Amy Sherman-Palladino, etc. Archive statement: Mystic's archive, OK. Other archives: NO. Do not archive this story without my permission. Fathers by Megan Reilly eponine119@worldnet.att.net August 3, 2001 Last night was a terrible night in Lorelai's life. But I feel like it was one of the best nights in my life. Which is wrong. I should just get over it. Stop thinking about it. Stop burning the french fries and setting off the smoke alarm in the kitchen because I'm daydreaming. I don't daydream, by the way. But if the alarm goes off one more time, Kirk's going to bust in here with a firehose and things will get ugly. There was a crisis and she turned to me. Because I was there. Otherwise she would have called Sookie. Or Mrs. Kim, or anyone else in town. Max Medina. She said I looked good, though. Damn it, the fries are on fire again. * * * I wonder what Luke's father was like. He talks about him like he's this great guy, like he was the best dad in the whole world. But something in his eyes says maybe he wasn't, really. That it's because he's dead. The way I talked about my father last night, when I thought he was going to be dead. I feel like I've turned him into this horrible person when really he's not. The things I said were true. He did what he was supposed to do. He took care of his family. He didn't have to buy me a Barbie. I had a Barbie anyway. What I really wanted, was him. I can't even fit together the things Luke's told me to put together a picture of his dad. His name was William. He had a hardware store. Did he look like Luke? Was he grumpy but soft underneath? Would he have taken Luke shopping for a Barbie? So to speak. It's strange, how little we know of other people's lives. Even the people we see every day, the people we feel the closest to. * * * The Stars Hollow cemetery is on the gentle slope of a hill near the edge of town. Old stones stand at odd angles, some of them broken. Those are the ones that say, in hard to read letters, things like "Died 1789." For some reason, Lorelai pictured Luke's dad's marker as one of those old stones, as though he'd lived a hundred years ago. But it was flat and modern looking. William Danes. There were daisies resting against the stone. She stood there, head cocked slightly to one side, looking at the white and yellow flowers. She heard someone walk up beside her and then sensed him standing there, but didn't turn at first. Just felt his presence, half-expecting him to touch her shoulder, but Luke never touched her. After a moment, Lorelai turned her head and saw Luke standing there. With daisies in his hand. He looked embarrassed as he leaned past her and set the flowers on the grave. Then he looked at her and she didn't know what to say, which led to the babbling. "I...just...thought, you know...I wanted to..." "Lorelai, it's okay," Luke said. "I'm glad it's okay," she replied. Then frowned. "Why aren't you at the diner?" "Small kitchen fire," Luke said. Lorelai raised her eyebrows interestedly. "It was nothing." They stood there in a strange silence for another few moments. "Well, I guess I'd better go," Luke said, not moving. "No, I should be the one to go," Lorelai said. "This is your...I mean, he's..." This was just Luke, why didn't she know what to say to him? "Thanks," said Luke. Lorelai smiled, because she knew what he meant. She nodded, and started walking back to where she'd left the Jeep. She turned and glanced back and saw Luke watching her. She raised her hand to wave and stumbled over the uneven ground. "It's okay," she called, waving again. She got in her car. When she sped past Luke on her way to the cemetery exit, he had an expression on his face she didn't think she'd ever seen before. And even though she knew nothing more about the man than she had before the visit, Lorelai felt like she'd learned something about William Danes. And his son. And just maybe about her own father, too. End. Feedback would be great! -- _______________________________ Megan eponine119@worldnet.att.net http://members.dencity.com/eponine/ "It's my sunset." -Pinocchio, Harsh Realm