Friday, 8/30:  MTC Orientation, Apocalypse Now, and Cashbox KTV

 

As Gary had warned, orientation was a joke.  The auditorium was packed, with barely enough seats for everyone.  The acoustics were terrible, as was the décor (strung green paper Christmas trees with “Merry Xmas” hung from ceiling, gaudy red 80’s curtains on the stage, etc.).  The director went over lots of childish rules and things and I felt just like I was back at Love Boat, then showed a cheesy 70’s film about the history and facilities of the MTC (Yale University was responsible for creating the beginners textbooks), holiday celebrations and outings where we can participate.  I kept looking around yawning and discreetly eating the red bean bun I got at the FamilyMart (ChuanJia) that morning—it’s right next to my bus stop, I guess that’s where I’ll be having breakfast then.  It wasn’t ‘til after I was done that the guy said [“Please don’t eat or drink in the auditorium.”]  Buses have signs that say that too.  This will be something to get used to since I’m accustomed to having most “meals” (rather, caloric fuel) in transit, while everyone here is into properly sitting down in a place designated for eating before you can consume something.  I looked around wondering when I’d start meeting people—should I start talking to people?  The guy sitting to my right, a tall athletic-looking brown-haired white guy looked pretty cool but I couldn’t think of anything to say, and the last thing I wanted was to give the impression I’m another Asian girl ready to fall all over his bod just because he is white. 

 

The administrative system is of the same decade as the film and décor.  In a word, ridiculously disorganized.  We were dismissed to go obtain our schedules so it was a mob scene, everyone pressing up to the bulletin board to read the tiny print, our names and class and room and time.  After I found mine and squeezed through, had to line up to obtain the form, and it was all written there, duh.  Then we had to go to another floor where the times/rooms for all classes were posted, to see if we wanted to switch to another class.  The titles of the classes were all written in Chinese so I didn’t even know what kind/level I was in, I just copied down the title and the other level 1 class title, found there were 3 sections at 8-10 am, one of them mine, and only 1 section from 10am-12 which I was determined to switch into.  I asked the office about the 2 titles and they said I’m in the one that means I can speak pretty well, but can’t read/write.  WooOOoo.  I can speak well?  I didn’t know that. 

 

After that they were giving tours of the building.  I ran into a tour group outside the computer room being given in English, but just listening for a minute I knew it was BS and a waste of time.  He gave his schpiel about how we had to pay 300 NT fee for the semester and couldn’t use the lab right now, and as soon as they moved on I went in just like I had the first day, put my ID down and sat at a PC.  Again, the supervisor never looked up.  I emailed some, went to the bookstore to try to order my textbooks but they said if I end up switching I might not have the same book, so I had to wait. 

 

        I took the MRT to ShiMin to pick up my ARC at the police station.  When I got out I was hoping to see the police station right there, but of course didn’t.  It was really hot and I didn’t know how to say police station in Chinese.  I wandered a little, finally spotted a white guy getting on a motorbike and said in Chinese “Sir, excuse me” then in English, “Do you know where the police station is?”  He sounded visibly annoyed, as are most white people who’ve been living here and know Chinese, since everyone insists on speaking to them in English all the time (Gary), and pointed to the building right next to us, “It’s right there.”  Duh.  Got the card in a snap, it feels flimsy and very easily faked, but anyway, I now have a green card.

 

        I’d called Gary and we were set to meet at 3 at GongGuan station, where TaiDa (National Taiwan University) is.  I got there a few minutes early for once and bought a passion fruit juice at a stand and was about to step into a book/music store to browse when Kate spotted me and said they were already in there looking.  I showed them my green card.  Art said Good, now if the police stop you, you can whip this out and say “Ha!  I’m not DaLuMa!”  I asked “What’s that?”  He said “Those girls who swim over illegally from the mainland across the strait.”  He looked at the green card, MTC ID, and extra passport photos and claimed I was very photogenic.  I said They’re all the same photo. 

 

We wandered down the street where there were lots of shops (as always) that Kate said are cheap.  I saw underwear for like $7US, top and bottom set, really cute, in all pretty pastel colors, and kept stopping to look at umbrellas since I needed one for the sun (JuLing had mentioned it more than once and I know it’s her subtle hint I’m too dark).  I got one for 199, but after I paid for it we saw even smaller, lighter ones next to those, for 390, as small as cellphones.  I waffled as Gary went into a bakery to buy a small loaf of red bean bread.

 

Bakeries here are heavenly places.  They smell soooo wonderful and there are all sorts of breads and buns with interesting things sprinkled on top of them and stuffed with things, dried pork, scallions, red bean, sweet green bean, taro, egg, cheese, and many others I’m sure I don’t know, and all are incredibly soft, like stuffed animals.  Even the sliced bread in plastic bags is so soft, and slices are thick and perfectly square.  There are bags of tiny cookies, some in different pastel colors, everything is wrapped cute, and arranged so that you just go through and browse. 

 

Anyways, I decided having a really small, light umbrella was worth the extra money--after all it was still cheap for an umbrella, though expensive for here, so I went back and changed it.  Kate tried to haggle but the girl didn’t budge.  Gary recommended the lavender, and I trust his taste because we all (including himself) often joke that he’s gay.  Umbrellas here come in all kinds of very pretty colors and patterns, because they’re such indispensable accessories—rain or shine.

 

I’ve quickly learned that though the lavender is pretty, it doesn’t do jack to block sunlight because it’s too light.

 

We walked through the TaiDa campus main road, past the huge gym arena which looks like a multi-level stadium and has everything inside, 2 pools, squash courts, saunas…They said to try to get a student ID and I can use it for cheap.  If not, I can still join but it costs much more.  Walked past tennis and basketball courts, where Gary joked “Come on Arthur, let’s play.”  The guys playing didn’t look that good and I said Dave is much better than these guys.  Gary said when he, Ofiji and Joe were here one summer studying at ShiDa, they came to play just for the hell of it even though none of them really play, and when the local students saw Ofiji they all watched him expectantly, waiting for him to bust out some crazy moves since he’s black, but he’s actually the most spasdic ball player Gary’s ever seen, and was just terrible. 

 

The road we were on was blocked off to cars and motorbikes, people were bicycling and I wished I had my blades, though I never see anyone blading here.  We reached the main gate and they took some pictures, but it didn’t look all that nice…construction going on.

Stopped to take required photo of global reknown Ronald McD.

 

        We went back to the hotels to change. This time I wore my sparkly tank top and jeans, since we weren’t doing anything dressy.  Kate had it all planned--dinner, KTV, and club that didn’t open UNTIL 2am.  It sounded crazy but I said OK, we’ll do it. 

 

We went to a trendy place for dinner, called Apocalypse Now, which is like a beer hall where you can get your own mini keg with a tap at your table, and a DJ plays dance music on a stage.  It was a cool concept and we wondered if there’s anything like this in NYC, and if not why not.  The waitstaff all wore long black aprons that looked like leather, even the guys, making them look like they were wearing skirts (Art:  “If the guys didn’t have to wear those gay skirts, I’d want to work here”).  Some of the girl staff wore short yellow dresses.  All wore black boots.  All were good-looking.  Art said excitedly, like it was such a new concept, that’s what Gary and he would do when they start their own business (apparently they’re always trying to think of a great business idea to make tons of money, they don’t really want to practice law, “Law’s just a temporary thing”), is open a restaurant and only hire “hot guys and hot chicks”, and they two would be the owners, and I could be their head manager or something.  I said Great, just what my career aspirations are.  He kept saying, “Yeah!!  Hot chicks, only hot chicks!”  until I finally asked, “Don’t you ever look beyond the surface?”  He stopped his raving and said, “What do you mean?” 

 

We had about a 30 minute wait.  One of Gary’s friends from the club night, Wayne, came.  We got a table and tried to figure out how many beers the keg was, and decided probably about 9-10, and that I and Kate would have 1 each, Art and Wayne 2 each, and Gary the last 3.  The beer (San Miguel) tasted surprisingly good, very light and not too beer-y.  Gary joked that that probably meant it was watered down.  I let them order the dishes as usual.  They’re surprisingly healthy for guys, they order lots of vegetables, tofu.  I was hoping for some meat, and fish.  I chose a fried fish, but for the meat dish they got something in a big stew pot with lots of things I couldn’t exactly identify.  I recognized red blocks as coagulated blood which I never eat, and tried a piece of meat which felt like it was all fat, so I left it on the plate and just ate the other dishes.  At the end, Gary asked me if I liked the stew, I said not really, he said do you know what it is?  Pig’s blood and cow intestine.  The fatty thing was intestine.  OK, so at least I’m consistent about what I don’t like.  It’s not like I didn’t eat it only after knowing what it was. 

 

Art got hot and took off his shirt and was wearing a black wife-beater.  Gary asked Kate how to say wife-beater in Chinese (“Zemme shuo Wife-beater?  Yeh jiau Ginny tee?”) but she didn’t know.  Gary though, always wears long pants and two layers of shirts, a T-shirt and a collared button down on top.  I don’t know how he does it in this heat.  He’s also pretty hairy, his arms all covered with almost fur, and he says he gets asked a lot if it makes him hot, but he says it doesn’t.  I guess he wouldn’t know what it feels like NOT to have it, unless he’s ever tried to remove it.  Maybe if he did, he’d feel freezing.

 

We had a lot of time to kill because our KTV appointment was for 11:20 and it was only 10.  The most famous KTV chain is Cashbox (ChienGui) and it’s so popular that you need to reserve a room several days in advance, and we only did it one day in advance.  We’d passed one the first afternoon, it was the middle of the day and it was still crowded.  But that’s because kids haven’t started school yet, and are still on summer vacation.

 

As people were finishing dinner, a live band started playing up front and the lead singer who was apparently pretty well-known, started singing Ricky Martin and Enrique songs—it seemed to be Latino theme night.  Girl dancers came out and started dancing on the tables, spotlights on them and dance lights all around the room.  A couple times they pulled up random girls from tables to get on and dance.

 

At KTV, two of Kate’s friends from the club came too and I quickly learned this was going to be a majority of Chinese songs that I didn’t know, because I was the only one who couldn’t read.  I ordered a few English ones but was suddenly getting really tired and not feeling very into it, and fell asleep on the couch, wearing Art’s shirt since I was cold and he wasn’t using it (still brandishing the wife-beater).  This always happens after I drink alcohol with a meal, which is why I don’t usually order it with dinner.  Kate’s friends dominated the whole time, anyway, singing a few English ones too that they probably choose and order every time they go until they know them perfectly.  Gary says, “Isn’t it funny that when they sing these songs they sound like they have perfect English, but then you talk to them and…?” 

 

Gary said Wayne is a great singer, but we couldn’t get him to sing.  I think they also felt kinda bad for me, so Gary and Art tried to order a couple Jacky Cheung songs I knew for us to do together, but one never came up, and one they didn’t have.  I went to the bathroom and forgot which room we were in when I came back.  I opened a few wrong doors and embarrassed, waited for awhile hoping one of them would come out, but finally found it through process of elimination.  We’d all noticed there was an abnormally huge toilet, really a big basin, in front of the stalls in the bathrooms and wondered what it was.  Someone answered it’s a puke-tank, there especially for people to puke in.  It made sense because it’s larger than a real toilet and they don’t want you messing the real toilets, but it’s totally in the open and I honestly wouldn’t want to be puking in front of people washing their hands and doing their makeup.  Anyway, I don’t think people use it because when I went to the bathroom the cleaning lady was in one of the regular toilet stalls, cleaning up what I believe was puke.

 

Another of Kate’s friends arrived to go to the 2AM club.  I was way too tired to go and Gary said I was lucky, he wanted to go to bed too, but they had to because Kate and her friends expected them too, and besides they had a great girl/guy ratio.  They dropped me off first even though I wasn’t really on the way, and I crashed.